Help--My Kid is Driving Me Crazy: The 17 Ways Kids Manipulate Their Parents, and What You Can Do About It

( 9 )

Overview

A family psychologist offers parents clear and simple techniques for disarming the strategies kids use to manipulate them.

Every parent knows that children quickly learn how to push their buttons. Now, this invaluable and insightful book, written by a prominent clinical psychologist, identifies the specific ways kids manipulate their parents-and how to stop each tactic. These uncannily sophisticated and undermining strategies include:

• ...

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Help--My Kid is Driving Me Crazy: The 17 Ways Kids Manipulate Their Parents, and What You CanDo About It

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Overview

A family psychologist offers parents clear and simple techniques for disarming the strategies kids use to manipulate them.

Every parent knows that children quickly learn how to push their buttons. Now, this invaluable and insightful book, written by a prominent clinical psychologist, identifies the specific ways kids manipulate their parents-and how to stop each tactic. These uncannily sophisticated and undermining strategies include:

• Emotional blackmail
• Shutting down
• Negotiation
• Protest
• Playing the victim
• Dividing the parents

Filled with informative and practical advice, this insightful guide is designed to help parents restore harmony, discipline, and healthy relationships-and put an end to selfish, manipulative behavior for good.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780399535260
  • Publisher: Penguin Group (USA) Incorporated
  • Publication date: 9/1/2009
  • Pages: 240
  • Sales rank: 804,322
  • Product dimensions: 5.40 (w) x 8.20 (h) x 0.70 (d)

Meet the Author

David Swanson, Psy.D., a licensed clinical psychologist practicing in Encino, California, treats children, teens, and families suffering from anxiety disorders, behavioral difficulties, and social problems to improve parent-child relationships.
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Table of Contents

The 17 Ways Kids Manipulate Their Parents xi

Introduction 1

Part 1 How Did We Get Here? The Truth About Kids, Parents, and the Unspoken Dynamics Between Them 9

1 The Three Major Misconceptions Most Parents Believe 11

2 The Three Innate Desires That Lead Most Parents to Inconsistency 21

Part 2 Your Child's Tools of Power The 17 Ways Kids Manipulate to Get What They Want 25

3 Emotional Blackmail 27

4 Punishment 32

5 Shutting Down 40

6 Irrational Logic 46

7 Negotiation 52

8 Confrontation and Protest 57

9 Steamrolling 67

10 Covert Operations 74

11 Divide and Conquer 82

12 Tactical Engagement 88

13 Creating Leverage 97

14 Playing the Victim 101

15 Forging the Friendship 105

16 Character Comparison 112

17 Casting Doubt 117

18 Glorification 123

19 Surprise Attack 128

Part 3 Developing an Action Plan to Decrease Problematic Behavior in the Future 133

20 The Five Reasons Children Manipulate 135

21 Assessing Your Child's Temperament: Using the Star Method 142

Part 4 Setting Structure Based on Your Child's Temperament Meeting Your Child's Interpersonal Needs 149

22 The Self-Doubting Child 151

23 The Impulsive Child: A Case of the Shuns 158

24 The Oppositional Child 167

25 The Low-Tolerant Child: A Need for Control 179

26 The Anxious/Insecure Child 195

Final Note 209

Appendix: Five Steps for Imposing a Restriction 211

Special Acknowledgment 213

Index 215

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 3.5
( 9 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 9 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted November 21, 2013

    Y CANT U JUST SAY

    Shut up and listen to me. You need to calm down. You are giving me a brain smoosh. LOL JK. ACTUALLY I AM A KID IM TEN YRS OLD! LOL

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted September 2, 2011

    Excellent resource for all parents!

    No matter how successful a parent you think you are this book will uncover tactics your child has in place to usurp your ability as a parent. The book is written in a practical and easy to use format. It is helpful in your daily relations with your child whether they be in Grade School or in High School. How wonderful to come across this tool. Within reading a few chapters I was able to put to use a few examples from the book to much success. Read it once, twice and then send it to your friends!!

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted September 8, 2009

    Great Book

    This is truly a great book.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted August 26, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    Help-My Kid Drove Me Crazy

    We are all in the back to school swing. Right?
    No? Well, maybe some of us still need a little help.

    Dr. Swanson shares the following back-to-school transition tips:

    1. Before school starts, send your child to bed at the normal school year bedtime.
    2. Start waking your child up at the same time he would if school were in session. (Waking up early is a great trick for getting a child to fall asleep at a reasonable hour.)
    3. Begin to set limits around things that conflict with school-year priorities (video games, television, overnights, e.g.).
    4. If assigned, make sure that your child's summer academic projects are completed and ready to be handed in.
    5. Put other structured routines--such as dinner time, baths/showers, and hygiene rituals--back into place.
    6. Regardless of the stress, fight the battles of getting back to the normal routine now. Waiting for the school year to return will only add to your stress.
    7. Lastly, take your child shopping for school clothes and supplies. Usually, new clothes and supplies elevate a child's excitement about returning to school.

    Now that we have that all down pat, you do have that routine set? Right? Okay at least we are still working on a routine. Now what can we do for the dragging our feet to get ready times. Or is it the I don't wanna do my homework? Yeah, of course we are still struggling with "Chores, I have to do chores?" But we can work on all of these things with a little help and guidance.

    Dr. Swanson has a new book to help. "Help! My Kid Is Driving Me Crazy: The 17 Ways Kids Manipulate Their Parents and What You Can Do About It". Sounds familiar right? I know I have had to deal with some issues when helping to raise children. Some with ADD/ADHD and others just lil button pushers. We all have them. Which are your kids favorite ways to get you to do what they want?

    Emotional Blackmail
    Shutting Down
    Irrational Logic
    Negotiation
    Divide and Conquer
    Playing the Victim

    Each of these issues and more are addressed in Dr. Swanson's book. I know that CG was a great lil negotiator. And Nessa's son can do the irrational logic to a tee. Of course lil Miss Ashley just shuts down. I am glad there is a way I can find some help, back up, bring out the child raising hand book from time to time. We are all great parents but help and advice is still needed.

    SO, check out
    "Help! My Kid Is Driving Me Crazy: The 17 Ways Kids Manipulate Their Parents and What You Can Do About It"
    and find some answers for yourself.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 6, 2009

    Great Parenting Guide for Parents Frustrated With Their Child's Behavior Problems

    Any parent who struggles with behavior problems on the part of their child knows all to well the frustration, sadness and guilt that comes along with it.

    NOW THERE'S 'HELP!'

    Dr. Swanson has given us an easy-to-use quick reference guide to better understand and effectively intervene when these problems arise. With the use of this incredible tool, parents can stop the fighting and start building strong bonds and a lifetime of fulfilling attachment.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 6, 2013

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted May 31, 2010

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted September 20, 2009

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted September 1, 2009

    No text was provided for this review.

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