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Anyhoo . . . back to me and Randy.
It was a Saturday and my mom dropped me off at Toady's party for some harmless, supervised dancing and some unsupervised lovin' if we were lucky (wink, wink). A few of us were in Toady's bedroom when he started going "C'mon, you guys, start kissing!" He could be such a dork! Randy was way above that chumpery, so he shrugged Toady off and asked if I wanted to go outside. Gulp, tight throat, nervous skinny girl, don't screw it up. "Sure." It's always best to play nonchalant girl when you are about to get a smooch. He took my hand and we crept around the house without talking. He stood next to a fence that was hidden from the rest of the house, put his hands on my hips, and pulled me a little closer. He had so much experience! A woman knows these things, don't you think? I have low blood pressure. The moon was bright in the autumn sky and his little pink lips looked sweet and fresh. It was a little cold. I was still quiet (for once) because I didn't want to say something wrong and kill the moment. I was ready. My stomach felt like I was on a ride at Magic Mountain where the bottom drops out and you free-fall for a few seconds that frighten you and amuse you all at once. He was smiling a happy little puppy smile and finally moved his face in close to mine and slowly planted a kiss that only the vice president of the student body would know how to give. It was all so yummy, like cookie dough and presents and tap shoes, it was something I had thought about so much and built up and feared. What are you supposed to do during your first kiss? How much are you supposed to do on the first night you become physical? What is he going to expect from me? Hedidn't maul me, he didn't rip off my Guess? jeans with the little ankle zippers. He just held my face, we pressed our lips together and became cotton candy for a few seconds that night. It was one of those nights you go back to in your mind when the mental computer is trying to pull up those fresh, sweet images to revitalize something tired inside.
Randy and I broke up a few weeks later. He called me up on a Sunday night and chatted with me for about twenty minutes about sports and school politics. Apparently his numbers were down in a straw poll and he needed to refresh his youthful image. Unfortunately I was not the refreshment. I got the ax. He broke up with me after wasting twenty minutes of my time pretending to still be my sweet junior high boyfriend with the cute puppy lips and the sugary hand-holding. He was the model for the next ten years of my dating future and he was ruining it by stringing me along with Sunday night small talk. That was the last time I dated someone in public office. The pressure to maintain a perfect relationship was too much, the facade too demanding. It was probably best we broke up when we did, you know, before we had children. I admit, it was hard for me to look Randy in the eye after that pride-crushing blow. It's hard to have your first love dump you on the side of the road like a sack of old hangers. It's OK now, the wounds have healed. He went on to date a bunch of perky rally girls and eventually became a religious fanatic in New Zealand (a beautiful country, you should see all the sheep!) and moves around the world with his group preaching their message of love and acceptance. Where was my love, Randy? Why couldn't you accept me? Was I a little too "fast" for you? Oh well . . . I was the girl who got the kiss in the moonlight at the boy-girl party. I got to be Mr. Vice President's junior high girlfriend for three weeks, and that suited me just fine. Your first kiss is hopefully the sweetest, and that goes hand in hand with first love, which is powerful and so untouchable in its emotion because your heart is so fresh and unscathed, so ready to fall so deeply in love, and it breaks so hard when it falls too fast. If you are too careful with your heart you will never fall completely in love and you won't experience the best part of life. Whoever your Randy is I hope he treats you well and basks in your sunshine. Just don't follow him to New Zealand. It's best to break up with someone before you become one of the sheep, no matter how well they kiss.
Posted July 23, 2003
I found this book to be a most interesting and feel that it is a book all females should read. It gives great third-party insite and would help guide younger women to make the right life choices. Kennedy goes into vivid detail about some tough issues plaguing today's girls such as smoking and breast size. Her own tales and thoughts will comfort those facing the same problems that she did. A great read!!Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.