How to Land an A330 Airbus: And Other Vital Skills for the Modern Man

Overview

"His tongue-in-cheek technical explanations here will have you howling with laughter ..."-Daily Telegraph

After being given yet another pointless "man manual" that told him fifty ways to tie a bow tie in under thirty seconds, James May, star of the international TV phenomenon Top Gear, was certain guys needed a different kind of book. This book, in fact.

He reckons there are nine vital things that a true man should be able to do. Not stuff you ...

See more details below
Paperback (Reprint)
$12.09
BN.com price
(Save 19%)$14.99 List Price
Other sellers (Paperback)
  • All (22) from $1.99   
  • New (13) from $1.99   
  • Used (9) from $1.99   
Sending request ...

Overview

"His tongue-in-cheek technical explanations here will have you howling with laughter ..."-Daily Telegraph

After being given yet another pointless "man manual" that told him fifty ways to tie a bow tie in under thirty seconds, James May, star of the international TV phenomenon Top Gear, was certain guys needed a different kind of book. This book, in fact.

He reckons there are nine vital things that a true man should be able to do. Not stuff you can download from the Internet, but really important things, like:

HOW TO LAND AN A330 AIRBUS IN AN EMERGENCY*

HOW TO PREPARE AND EAT YOUR BEST FRIEND

HOW TO DRIVE THE PEPPERCORN CLASS A 1 4-6-2 PACIFIC LOCOMOTIVE TORNADO

HOW TO DELIVER TWINS

HOW TO DEFUSE AN UNEXPLODED WORLD WAR II BOMB

The chances that you will ever meet with the circumstances outlined here are, frankly,
very remote. But you're still better off knowing this stuff than not knowing it.
Life is a lottery, and maybe, just maybe,
it could be you who can do this stuff.
But only if you've read this book.

*Authors Note: This guide has been prepared for use in an absolute dire, buttock-clenching emergancy. None of the advice inside has been sanctioned by Airbus, any of its associates, or anyone else really. Do not attempt to fly the A330 Airbus on a recreational basis, or use one for joyriding. The A330 is not a toy.

Read More Show Less

Editorial Reviews

The New York Times Book Review
May's book would be a welcome addition to any collection of toilet reading, and I say that lovingly. It's a jauntily written set of nine hypothetical challenges, including "How to Invade and Occupy the Isle of Wight" and "How to Prepare and Eat Your Best Mate." The instructions are fact-based and fairly detailed.
—Henry Alford
Read More Show Less

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781402269554
  • Publisher: Sourcebooks
  • Publication date: 5/1/2012
  • Edition description: Reprint
  • Pages: 256
  • Sales rank: 990,739
  • Product dimensions: 5.90 (w) x 8.90 (h) x 0.70 (d)

Meet the Author

James May is a writer, broadcaster and co-host of Top Gear on BBC2. He writes a weekly column in the Daily Telegraph and has presented series for the BBC, ITV, Channel 4, and Sky.

Read More Show Less

Read an Excerpt

Introduction

Yes, there have been plenty of other books about so-called man skills, but they've all been a bit too bow-tie and light-a-barbecue for my liking.

This, I hope, is different. There are only nine topics, but they are not, as far as
I can discern, covered anywhere else.
That makes this book indispensable in a sea of duplicated "how to" manuals,
the one tin of fortifying Spam in the post-apocalyptic corner shop of putrefying groceries.

The chances that you will ever meet with the circumstances outlined here are, frankly, very remote. But you're still better off knowing this stuff than not knowing it. One day, there may well be an A330 Airbus wandering pilotlessly over the Atlantic, and someone will have to land it.

Life is a lottery, and maybe, just maybe, it could be you. But only if you've read this book.

Read More Show Less

Table of Contents

Introduction 1

Chapter 1 How to Land an A330 Airbus in an Emergency 3

Chapter 2 How to Escape from Buttins 35

Chapter 3 How to Fight a Duel 61

Chapter 4 How to Deliver Twins 89

Chapter 5 How to Drive the Peppercorn Class A1 4-6-2 Pacific Locomotive Tornado 109

Chapter 6 How to Invade and Occupy the Isle of Wight 141

Chapter 7 How to Prepare and Eat Your Best Mate 171

Chapter 8 How to Defuse an Unexploded World War II German Bomb 193

Chapter 9 How to Play the First Movement of Beethoven's Piano Sonata in C-Sharp Minor, Opus 27, No. 2 Quasi Una Fantasia (the "Moonlight") with No Previous Experience 217

Acknowledgments 247

About the Author 247

Index 248

Read More Show Less

Customer Reviews

Be the first to write a review
( 0 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(0)

4 Star

(0)

3 Star

(0)

2 Star

(0)

1 Star

(0)

Your Rating:

Your Name: Create a Pen Name or

Barnes & Noble.com Review Rules

Our reader reviews allow you to share your comments on titles you liked, or didn't, with others. By submitting an online review, you are representing to Barnes & Noble.com that all information contained in your review is original and accurate in all respects, and that the submission of such content by you and the posting of such content by Barnes & Noble.com does not and will not violate the rights of any third party. Please follow the rules below to help ensure that your review can be posted.

Reviews by Our Customers Under the Age of 13

We highly value and respect everyone's opinion concerning the titles we offer. However, we cannot allow persons under the age of 13 to have accounts at BN.com or to post customer reviews. Please see our Terms of Use for more details.

What to exclude from your review:

Please do not write about reviews, commentary, or information posted on the product page. If you see any errors in the information on the product page, please send us an email.

Reviews should not contain any of the following:

  • - HTML tags, profanity, obscenities, vulgarities, or comments that defame anyone
  • - Time-sensitive information such as tour dates, signings, lectures, etc.
  • - Single-word reviews. Other people will read your review to discover why you liked or didn't like the title. Be descriptive.
  • - Comments focusing on the author or that may ruin the ending for others
  • - Phone numbers, addresses, URLs
  • - Pricing and availability information or alternative ordering information
  • - Advertisements or commercial solicitation

Reminder:

  • - By submitting a review, you grant to Barnes & Noble.com and its sublicensees the royalty-free, perpetual, irrevocable right and license to use the review in accordance with the Barnes & Noble.com Terms of Use.
  • - Barnes & Noble.com reserves the right not to post any review -- particularly those that do not follow the terms and conditions of these Rules. Barnes & Noble.com also reserves the right to remove any review at any time without notice.
  • - See Terms of Use for other conditions and disclaimers.
Search for Products You'd Like to Recommend

Recommend other products that relate to your review. Just search for them below and share!

Create a Pen Name

Your Pen Name is your unique identity on BN.com. It will appear on the reviews you write and other website activities. Your Pen Name cannot be edited, changed or deleted once submitted.

 
Your Pen Name can be any combination of alphanumeric characters (plus - and _), and must be at least two characters long.

Continue Anonymously

    If you find inappropriate content, please report it to Barnes & Noble
    Why is this product inappropriate?
    Comments (optional)