How to Profit from the Coming Rapture: Getting Ahead When You're Left Behindby Steve Levy, Evie Levy
And that means one thing: investment opportunities!
For those who are not as expertly versed in the Book of Revelation, Ellis Weiner and Barbara Davilman, authors/em>
Are the end times near? Is the Rapture really just around the corner? Could Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson possibly be right? About 1 billion people among us believe, yes, absolutely.
And that means one thing: investment opportunities!
For those who are not as expertly versed in the Book of Revelation, Ellis Weiner and Barbara Davilman, authors of the bestselling Yiddish with Dick and Jane, helpfully offer both illumination and advice: What exactly is the Rapture, anyway? How is it different from the Tribulation? Who are the Antichrist, the Four Horsemen, and the 144,000 male virgins, and what do they want? And, most important, how can I make money during the 7 years of societal breakdown before Armaggedon?
Taking the familiar form of a how-to investment guide, HOW TO PROFIT FROM THE COMING RAPTURE instructs those readers who will certainly be left behind (Jews, Catholics, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, less ardent Protestants, and many more) on how to exploit the inevitable demise of the world in order to make a tidy profit. Sure, the rivers and seas will run with blood, locusts will swarm, mountains will move all over the place, and famine will strike. But for the five billion of us left behind, the post-Rapture world will be a time of even more unique investment opportunities.
Taking on the religious, political and consumer force of the modern End Times movement, comic authors Weiner and Davilman (Yiddish with Dick and Jane) turn out their sharpest satire yet with a hysterical step-by-step financial guide for those "left behind" by the Rapture-when, according to literal interpretations of the New Testament, the faithful will be whisked bodily to Heaven by Jesus. The authors chart their way through the Rapture and Tribulation, using actual bible verses and scholarship (Tim LaHaye, bestselling author of the Left Behind series, is quoted often) to chronicle the series of plagues that make up the end of the world (war, famine, a fiery mountain in the sea, invisible horse-shaped locusts), and their considerate plans for making money in the aftermath. At times laugh-out-loud funny, this skewering volume is also a sobering look at the beliefs of many Americans, but Weiner and Davilman employ irreverence without insult, handling the highly-charged topic with a surprisingly light touch. Illus.
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- Little, Brown and Company
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Meet the Author
Co-authors of the bestselling Yiddish with Dick and Jane, Ellis Weiner has been an editor of National Lampoon, a columnist for Spy, and a contributor to many magazines, including The New Yorker and the New York Times Magazine, and Barbara Davilman is a writer for television and movies. They live in Los Angeles.
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How To Profit From The Coming Rapture: Getting Ahead When You're Left Behind is one of the funniest books this reviewer has read in a long, long time! Steve and Evie Levy have produced a masterpiece of satire, religious irreverence, and plain good old humor that will leave you laughing till you cry. The timing of this book could not have been better. As tension in the Mideast grows, religious and ethnic intolerance spread, How To Profit From The Coming Rapture injects a healthy dose of comedy into a situation that typically has little to laugh about. With little, well actually no, regard for political correctness, Jewish stereotypes or Christian fundamentalism, the Levys guide the reader on an economic romp through the horrific events prophesied in the book of Revelation. Set up as an "investment guide," How To Profit From The Coming Rapture instructs the reader how to make the most (financially speaking of course) of the end of the world. Of particular fun is the section (called "Up, Up, and Away") that prepares the reader for the rapture; the instantaneous removal of all believing Christians from the Earth. The reader is told to take pictures of the people being raptured and sell them at a significant profit of course, to their loved ones left behind. After briefly considering and ultimately rejecting the claims of Michael Jackson, James Carville, and George W. Bush to be the Antichrist, the Levys move on to the actual events of the Seal, Trumpet, and Bowl judgments. Hilarious schemes are proposed for each judgment; carefully suggesting what commodities are "good to get into" and when to dump them. Feathered Quill highly recommends this book to everyone, Christian and Jew alike; it will be very hard for the reader not to laugh out loud. How To Profit From The Coming Rapture is well written, and is filled with hysterical diagrams, tables, charts and FAQs (Fearfully Asked Questions!). Quill says: Kudos to the Levys for poking fun at a subject usually devoid of humor.
This book tells how you can profit from providing services such as taking care of the pets and estates of those who have been raptured. Since most of mankind will not be taken up into heaven during the rapture but will endure years of famine, pestilence, and torture by The Beast during the tribulation, you might as well take the advice offered and make the best of it.
If you are tired of hearing your relatives say, "We're living in the last days," pick up this book for a hilarious yet thought-provoking read.