I Only Roast the Ones I Love: How to Bust Balls Without Burning Bridges

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More About This Book

Overview

One of the world’s foremost practitioners of insult comedy, Jeffrey Ross has memorably and uproariously roasted some of our favorite celebrities. Part memoir and part how-to guide, I Only Roast the Ones I Love unveils the irreverent secrets every successful roastmaster should know, such as how to:• Write roast jokes• Turn any event into a roast your friends will never forget• Rip your honoree a new one without hurting their feelings• Save yourself if you bomb• Prepare yourself to take a punch• Give toasts at family gatherings • Save lives through roasting

Jeff’s hilarious and poignant stories feature everyone from Dave Chappelle and Courtney Love to Tom Cruise and Bea Arthur and take readers backstage for unforgettable roasts of stars like Pamela Anderson, Flavor Flav, William Shatner, Shaquille O’Neal, Larry the Cable Guy, Bob Saget, and even the finalists of Dancing with the Stars. Most of all, Jeff’s teachings will inspire you to channel your own inner roastmaster.

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781439102794
  • Publisher: Gallery Books
  • Publication date: 6/1/2010
  • Pages: 290
  • Sales rank: 338,256
  • Product dimensions: 8.28 (w) x 5.60 (h) x 0.79 (d)

Meet the Author

JEFFREY ROSS is feared and revered for his appearances at celebrity roasts. In fact, making fun of people is a way of life for Jeffrey Ross. Called “an heir apparent to such old-school masters as Buddy Hackett and Rodney Dangerfield” by the New York Times, Ross has memorably and uproariously roasted many of America’s favorite stars. His first book, I Only Roast The Ones I Love: Busting Balls Without Burning Bridges will be released in September by Simon Spotlight Entertainment, a division of Simon & Schuster.

Jeff also stars in a popular Comedy Central stand-up DVD and CD, “Jeffrey Ross: No Offense – Live From New Jersey”, as well as an award-winning documentary he directed about his experience entertaining U.S. troops in Iraq titled, “Patriot Act: A Jeffrey Ross Home Movie.” Jeff divides his time between New York City, Los Angeles, and the road.

Read an Excerpt

We All Have an Inner Roastmaster

Our world is full of Roastmasters. Some of them are well known. But most of them are completely unknown. They live amongst us. They live inside of us. They are the part of us that occasionally says out loud what most people only dare think to themselves. The part of us that isn't afraid of severe consequences. The part of us that isn't afraid to die for a laugh. The part of us willing to take a punch from Courtney Love, if necessary.

It is the Roastmaster's belief that gracing someone you admire with unfiltered honesty is the highest form of respect you can pay them — especially when it's delivered in the form of a well-crafted joke.

Of course, not everyone has the guts to channel their inner Roastmaster. In fact, most people have the good sense NOT to insult people to their faces. Instead, they talk behind people's backs after they leave. They gossip. They whisper. They say mean things. They laugh at the weaknesses of others. This isjust human nature. But a Roastmaster defies human nature. A Roastmaster goes for it. A Roastmaster tells it like it is. A Roastmaster says, "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke." A Roastmaster kills.Copyright © 2009 by Jeffrey Ross

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