If at Birth You Don't Succeed: My Adventures with Disaster and Destiny

by Zach Anner Narrated by Zach Anner

Overview

Comedian Zach Anner opens his frank and devilishly funny book, If at Birth You Don't Succeed, with an admission: he botched his own birth. Two months early, underweight and under-prepared for life, he entered the world with cerebral palsy and an uncertain future. So how did this hairless mole-rat of a boy blossom into a viral internet sensation who's hosted two travel shows, impressed Oprah, driven the Mars Rover, and inspired a John Mayer song? (It wasn't "Your Body is a Wonderland.")

Zach lives by the mantra: when life gives you wheelchair, make lemonade. Whether recounting a valiant childhood attempt to woo Cindy Crawford, encounters with zealous faith healers, or the time he crapped his pants mere feet from Dr. Phil, Zach shares his fumbles with unflinching honesty and characteristic charm. By his thirtieth birthday, Zach had grown into an adult with a career in entertainment, millions of fans, a loving family, and friends who would literally carry him up mountains.

If at Birth You Don't Succeed is a hilariously irreverent and heartfelt memoir about finding your passion and your path even when it's paved with epic misadventure. This is the unlikely but not unlucky story of a man who couldn't safely open a bag of Skittles, but still became a fitness guru with fans around the world. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll fall in love with the Olive Garden all over again, and learn why cerebral palsy is, definitively, "the sexiest of the palsies."

A Macmillan Audio production.

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly

★ 11/09/2015
In this wonderful, open collection of essays, Anner, a stand-up comedian, reflects on his 30 years with cerebral palsy. Though the disease has limited Anner’s mobility, it’s done nothing to dampen his sense of humor and love of the world; he was a breakout favorite on the OWN reality competition Oprah’s Search for the Next TV Star, which launched a series of travel shows, and he writes at length about the experience with some intriguing insights. A great deal of Anner’s comedy is the peppy, uplifting sort you’d expect from someone who Oprah says “makes want to be a better person,” such as his elaborate Olive Garden metaphors for the nature of life, but there’s a healthy dose of sobering reality in the mix as well. Some of his most resonant work deals with the influences on his life as a person with a disability: Anner remarks wryly that being expected to act as an ambassador for the disabled “is a tightrope walk, which is hard on four wheels.” Maybe so, but with this book, he makes it look easy. (Mar.)

From the Publisher

Praise for Zach Anner

“Cerebral palsy couldn't stop Anner from becoming a celeb, traveling the world, and Friending Oprah (for starters).”—Cosmopolitan

“Zach makes you want to be a better person, with his humor and his heart and everything he's had to deal with from the time he was born. I've never met anyone like him, and I've met a lot of people.” —Oprah Winfrey

“A laugh-a-minute read…. If At Birth You Don’t Succeed recounts his journey from being what he calls a “crappy baby” [with cerebral palsy to] the host of his own travel show and an improbable workout guru. If there was ever a book that showed the importance of laughing at yourself, this is probably it.”—MentalFloss (#1 A Best New Book for Spring)

“Zach Anner is a truly inspiring and hysterical human being with a warped sense of humor (and body). He’s also an exceptional writer and his memoir is an absolute joy.”—Rainn Wilson

“I love Zach Anner and I love his memoir. If everyone were a little more like Zach, the world may not be abetter place, but it would be funnier place, which is a great step forward.”—Reddit Co-founder Alexis Ohanian

“I think I speak for everybody when I say...I want to see more of Zach.” —John Mayer

“Comedian Zach Anner takes readers on his wild wheelchair ride through 30 years of dealing with cerebral palsy—‘the sexiest of the palsies,’ as he likes to say. He rides a Mars Rover, wins an Oprah contest to create his own travel series and discovers he’s not only datable but desirable too. Hilarious and inspiring, Anner has made a life filled with fans, love, and Internet fame—reminding us that disability is no match for dreams.”—People (Book of the Week)

“Zach Anner is way more than an inspirational figure for anyone who has ever felt impossibly different: he’s also a great f**king writer. Wise and funny, with unfailing insight into the booby trap known as the human mind, you will hang on every word as you watch him turn his considerable intellectual gifts into a life worth envying. I like that this book has no genre, and neither does this special man.”—Lena Dunham

“A characteristically hilarious and candid book about growing up with cerebral palsy, winning a reality TV contest with Oprah’s OWN channel and becoming an unlikely-yet-inspiring fitness guru and YouTube celebrity with more than 10 million views.”—What’s Trending

“Zach Anner is the living definition of ‘giving better than he’s gotten.’ Life dealt him a difficult hand but he managed to beat the house with humor, heart, and a fearless punk attitude. Required reading.”—Patton Oswalt

“Wonderful. . . Anner’s comedy is the peppy, uplifting sort you’d expect from someone who Oprah says ‘makes [her] want to be a better person,’ such as his elaborate Olive Garden metaphors for the nature of life. . . . Anner remarks wryly that being expected to act as an ambassador for the disabled ‘is a tightrope walk, which is hard on four wheels.’ Maybe so, but with this book, he makes it look easy.”—Publishers Weekly (starred review)

“Funny, empowering…An inspirational memoir with a seasoned, infectious sense of humor…[Anner’s book chronicles] his three decades of life (so far) with cerebral palsy, a permanent condition that hasn’t prevented him from living his dream as a comic, a media sensation, and a motivational speaker.”—Kirkus Reviews

“Forget the travel show, Oprah. Give him a sitcom.” —The New York Times

“Our favorite lovable, optimistic, and absolutely hilarious YouTube star in a wheelchair.” —The Huffington Post

“He’s a unique, creative kid with a smart, edgy sense of humor.”—Arsenio Hall

“Meet Zach Anner...He’s handsome, smart, and funny [and] has won...legions of online fans.”—Tara Parker-Pope, The New York Times

“Zach Anner... Internet folk hero.” —Vulture, New York Magazine

Library Journal - Audio

05/15/2016
Born with cerebral palsy (or as the author likes to call it, the "sexiest of the palsies"), Anner has seen more and done more in his life than many healthy adults. He has worked at Disneyland, won his own show on the Oprah Winfrey Network (Rollin' with Zach), traversed the world for his travel shows, driven the Mars Rover, and become a viral sensation—all before the age of 30. The book starts out somewhat slow but picks up quickly and is filled with humor. Anner hosts several web series, including Wednesday Workout and Riding Shotgun, and travels around the United States speaking at universities and conferences. Anner narrates his own work, and listeners will be charmed by his wit and good attitude. VERDICT Patrons who enjoy humorous, inspiring memoirs with a message about refusing to accept limitations will want to listen to this.—Jessi Brown, Huntington City Twp. P.L., IN

APRIL 2016 - AudioFile

Ambitious and hard-working media personality Zach Anner narrates his memoir with the verve and compassion that make his story so compelling. Anner has cerebral palsy—as he says, “the sexiest of the palsies”—and listeners get a glimpse of that world, but what Anner truly offers is a funny and thoughtful exploration of the ways human beings can propel themselves forward or hold themselves back. This is a man who, with a voice full of expression and enthusiasm, frames accidentally soiling himself on the second day of filming a reality show as a hilarious tale of triumph. Anner’s sincerity shines throughout the production, and listeners will find themselves laughing out loud, nodding with recognition, and hoping for more of Anner’s stories. A.F. © AudioFile 2016, Portland, Maine

Kirkus Reviews

2015-12-08
Wry anecdotes from the life of comedian, "inspirational leader," and Oprah protégé Anner. "I never expected to be a disability advocate," writes the author in this funny, empowering autobiography chronicling his three decades of life (so far) with cerebral palsy, a permanent condition that hasn't prevented him from living his dream as a comic, a media sensation, and a motivational speaker. In Anner's own words, he was born "a crappy baby who failed his way into this world and I've been making the best of it ever since." The result of a premature birth, Anner's CP emerged, but the condition took a back seat early on during his very public, whirlwind life developing his TV and online persona and his work "humanizing disability." Anner's narrative is affably chatty as he escorts readers through the stories of his childhood, the nicknames, the foibles, and the journey toward winning a competition to star in his own (if short-lived) wheelchair travel show, Rollin' with Zach, on Oprah's OWN network. His viral audition for Oprah made him a "household name overnight," and the author recounts his random adventures in speed dating and telling "cripple jokes" onstage as a budding comedian. Not exclusively modest yet free of hubris, Anner's talky, balanced memoir picks up steam in the second half as the author's involvement in a radio show, a documentary, and a TV series provide pages of appealing, hilarious riffs, including a tenure as a "Disney Cast Member" and his "cowardly Casanova groove" period spent dispensing dating advice while ignoring his own late-blooming romantic life. After years of hard-won success and personal challenges, Anner still admits, "learning how to stay true to yourself while some people expect you to speak for everyone has been a tightrope walk—which is very hard to do on four wheels." An inspirational memoir with a seasoned, infectious sense of humor.

Product Details

BN ID:	2940171953089
Publisher:	Macmillan Audio
Publication date:	03/08/2016
Edition description:	Unabridged
Sales rank:	1,089,079

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