If God Is My Lover... Why Is My Bed So Cold?

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"IF GOD IS MY LOVER...WHY IS MY BED SO COLD?" You're single. You're saved- but you're not satisfied. Lying in your queen-size bed, you wonder why God hasn't sent your mate. Takeout dinner for one is starting to get old. You are doing your work in ministry as the Lord has directed - so what's the hold up? Is God ever going to release you to marry?

Do you really want to know my sister? Ask yourself truthfully, are you really prepared for that ...
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Overview

"IF GOD IS MY LOVER...WHY IS MY BED SO COLD?" You're single. You're saved- but you're not satisfied. Lying in your queen-size bed, you wonder why God hasn't sent your mate. Takeout dinner for one is starting to get old. You are doing your work in ministry as the Lord has directed - so what's the hold up? Is God ever going to release you to marry?

Do you really want to know my sister? Ask yourself truthfully, are you really prepared for that special man?

Perhaps you are already married, but the fire seems to be dwindling. You pray together and then turn to sleep, each on your own side of the bed. What is going on? Is this how a Christian relationship is supposed to be?

It's time for the truth to be told! It's time for you to set aside old church ideas, beliefs and doctrines that don't fully teach you what it will take to have a strong relationship with your mate and with Christ. You will soon read some things that the church mothers just didn't tell you.

Whether you are single or married, knowing these truths will help you to better your relationships overall. No longer will you have to ask yourself, "If God is my lover...why is my bed so cold?" The truth is ready to set you free!
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780979060304
  • Publisher: TriManna Publishing House
  • Publication date: 12/28/2006
  • Pages: 166

Meet the Author

About the Author
Olivia Stith is the CEO of Trimanna Productions and founder of the ministry, Women on the Road of Deliverance. She also is a motivational speaker and biblical studies teacher at Bethphage Outreach Center in Virginia where she and her family make their home. Ms. Stith is currently working on her novel - Pastor's Wives and The Front Row Diva.
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Read an Excerpt

Single, Saved, But Surely Not Satisfied !

If one more married person had explained to me how blessed I was to be single, I was going to scream. What was so blessed about it? No one to play "footsie" with over an evening dinner. No warm hands to playfully pull a remote control from while watching my favorite show. Not even a soul to pull the covers off of me at night. "Where was the blessing?", I wondered. In those moments, I usually flashed a superficial smile as I thought to myself how easy it must have been for them to tell me how content I should be when they were going home to a warm body and a handsome man.
I constantly replayed those thoughts. Personally, I was becoming frustrated. In my heart, I thought that I was doing everything for the sake of my love for Christ, yet it seemed like my works were going unmerited. Hey, I deserved happiness -- didn't I? I felt cheated.


Since God knows all things, I know God knew this. My problem was in the fact that He didn't seem to be bothered by my murmuring. I would act like a little child who tries to convince their parent to buy a toy. I would do some work or ministry program and then go to my secret closet and pray, all wide eyed with anticipation looking to heaven saying, "Okay, God. I did this. Now can I have my man? You see how I ministered Your Word. Lord, You know I love ya." (I had to throw my loving wink at him, too). Oh yes, I did that many times. Shoot, I did that many years! Still nothing changed.


As each day passed, my marital status remained the same. Single, saved and Lord knows not satisfied. I would cringe in my seat on Sundays listening to my fellow sisters testify about how happy they were in Jesus alone. "Really?", I wondered. What did my sister know that I didn't? Was there some spiritual formula to being single and happy? Where does she eat? Who does she talk to at night? Was she sane? Somebody tell me!


I was tired of smiling across tables at couples at retreats and conferences and then going to my quiet room. I was tired of marking the boxes marked "Ms." or "Miss" on documents. I wanted to be "Mrs.-Whoever-Was-Out-There-For-Me". I wanted a change of life and I was determined that I would devise a way to show God that I was prepared.


I kept hearing folks say that verse that's seared in all of our minds: "But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you, as well." (Matt. 6:33 NIV) I jumped up, ecstatic that I had "figured it out". I would plunge myself fully into ministry work and just do it all. I would plan programs, counsel the lonely, pray for the sick. Hey, if I did all of that -- I was sure that God would see that I was totally sold out for Him. So that is what I did. Like that persistent child, I went to Him again. Nothing. Same result.


Unfortunately, waiting led to foolish rebellions and unequally-yoked relationships. I felt myself slipping with men who were surely not sent from God. My goodness, it was as though The Enemy went shopping and handpicked ones just for me; shined them up real good with intelligent conversation; taught them a few scriptures; gave them some charisma and then said, "Go get her boy!" They almost did get me. Thank God that in the midst of my foolishness, the Holy Spirit opened my eyes to the truth -- opened eyes that wanted to stay shut. "A half a loaf of bread is better than none", I heard one Pastor say. What a sad untruth because what happens is that the loaf gets stale real fast. It gets old and is as unhealthy as a dead-end relationship. Both my spiritual and physical lives were being affected. I felt as though I was dying inside. My desire for companionship would doom me to eternal loneliness unless a change came.


It came in a way I least expected. I was driving past our church, on a rare moment that I had away from the kids and others, and stopped inside to pray. I walked around the building, visualizing the services that had taken place there, with heaviness on my heart. The more I looked around -- the sadder I became. My loneliness began to manifest itself in my tears. I fell onto the altar where I had prayed for tear-soaked members many times. Today was my time. I sat there and I cried unto God from the pit of my heart. I told Him how lonely and angry I was. I didn't understand why He was blessing others with families while my children and I were stuck in a rut. I grabbed my stomach and began to wail louder and louder. I didn't care who heard me, this time. I was broken inside and needed answers.


I pulled myself off of the floor and slumped into a chair. I was certain that this was another moment in my life that God would silently listen as I cried. I sat there expecting nothing; to be honest with you, then to my surprise God was no longer silent. I heard the Spirit of The Lord speaking within my heart, saying: "Let Me love you and show you what you deserve. Give Me the opportunity to mold you into the woman you are to become. Allow Me to show you what qualities you must possess to be that woman of integrity in Proverbs 31. Learn to love Me with your full heart. Learn to accept pure love without hesitation. Then, my daughter, I will release you to love a man beyond your imagination."


I stopped crying and sat there absorbing what I had heard. For once, I'd stopped listening to my sadness and listened to the voice of God. Finally, after all these years, I got it. God did not want to withhold a loving relationship from me. He wanted me to allow Him to mold me into a vessel fitting for the king whom he had set aside for me to be my husband. I just had to allow Him to take me through the process.

It was then that it dawned on me. It was not about how much scripture I knew; it was about knowing myself fully inside and out -- physically, emotionally and spiritually. All of these aspects would represent the woman who I was to become. My life was not solely ministry. I was a full-fledged, warm-blooded, thinking and loving woman with dreams, desires, emotions, likes and dislikes. I had areas in my past that needed to be dealt with and things in my present that needed revamping. Yes, I was getting the picture. Instead of jumping into a relationship and then cleaning house, I had to clean things up first.


I was accepting of what I'd heard and felt a weight lifting because of the hope that was restored in my spirit. I knew, now, that the process that God was taking me through to prepare me for my mate was for my own good. He was cleansing the rooms of my heart of the things that tried to taint me -- things that I hadn't recognized -- and perfuming me up to be found by that special one. God was loving me by showing me my inner beauty. I stopped complaining and allowed the process of acceptance and renewal to begin. I started handling life with a different mindset. My motives and attitudes had changed and self-appreciation began to take hold. I began to see the benefits that singleness would reap for me --a fulfilling one-on-one relationship with God that would eventually lead to my soul mate.


Finally! The light came on and truth began to be revealed! It's so good that I can't keep it to myself. So here I am now, girlfriend, sharing my findings. I am one who can relate to others going through the same plight. I still have my moments when I want to sigh and grumble; but, I keep moving forward. I smile, now, as I sit and listen to my single sisters fretting over the comments like "Be happy you're single, girlfriend." They look at me and raise their eyebrows as if to say, "If God is my Lover, why is my bed so cold?" I throw my hands up and say, "Sister, I thought you would never ask! Let me tell ya! This is what you have to do!"

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 5
( 22 )
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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 22 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 1, 2007

    When this lady speaks...She demands attention!!

    In the inspirational book If God Is My Lover, Why Is My Bed So Cold? Readers are given a in your face look at relationships. Author Olivia Stith does an impressive job of taking the same bible scriptures you have sat in church many of Sundays reading and simply applied them in a influential way that will make you examine relationships. If God Is My Lover, Why Is My Bed So Cold? will definitely leave readers applauding the author for her simple approach to the old question of when will I meet my soul mate? The authors approach will leave the readers talking for days. The author also leaves the reader knowing the truth about how and when that special someone is coming. The author eliminates the aged myths when it comes to women and especially the relationships they were taught they were supposed to have. In the novel If God Is My Lover, Why Is My Bed So Cold? Readers will find the literary effort of author Olivia Stith to be insightful but more a so bona fide hit! The author tackles an often-taboo subject and all Christian women will be able to relate. If God Is My Lover, Why Is My Bed So Cold? hands down is sure on it¿s way to being every book club¿s/ ministry must read. I enthusiastically anticipate the next literary endeavor from Olivia Stith.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 10, 2006

    A wonderful analogy for a book title

    Invigorating,refreshing and from reading the excerpt will capture your full attention. A question in the minds of so many who have yet to find the answer, I look forward to having a enlightening experience and gaining some understanding from a truly spiritual gifted sister with such animation in personality....will be a great stocking stuffer for this Chritmas seson.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 5, 2006

    The million dollar question...

    Prayerfully speaking, please let this novel provide enlightment, insight, and answers to the question that so many Christian sisters struggle with in their personal lives. When you are striving to live an obedient life under the annointing of God day-in, day out, week-in, week-out, month-in, month-out..... Then those months turn into years, and you are still hurting, wondering, and asking the Lord, 'How can I be so blessed & fulfilled in other dimensions, however I'm yet to know that *special* man?' I can't wait to read this one!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 4, 2006

    Excellent

    Excellent and insightful. I appreciate the realness when it comes to a subject that many talk around but never truly address.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 8, 2006

    Enough Said!!!!!!

    I am just so excited for the release so I can get into the books pages. I mean the title alone says so much......... Makes you say 'mmmmmmmmmm'

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 5, 2006

    If God Is My Lover... Why Is My Bed So Cold?

    I declare and decree that a mighty blessing and anoiting be on this book. I am gonna BUY this book because then i can say I brought Author Olivia D. Stith 1st Book!! Maybe I can get an autograph to show my friends when she sitting up on Oprah!! Olivia-Oprah... hmmm.... the O's got it!!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 3, 2006

    Awesome: Right on time Word

    This book is going to be an awesome tool, used to set so many women free, for it is full of truth and it is the truth that will make you free. Wisdom is the principal thing, therefore get wisdom, In all of thy getting get an understanding. After reading this book what you may not have understood in the past , will be libertating if you will apply it to your life.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2006

    LOOKS LIKE A #1 BEST SELLER TO ME!

    The title of the book gives us a peek into the content of this work. It is a subject that needs to be addressed in today's society. It compels its potential readers to wait expectantly for the message!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2006

    AN AUTHENTIC WORD

    An age old question asked by many women who serve the Lord....If God Is My Lover...Why Is My Bed So Cold? Finally a book to reach within the depths of what it means to have God complete you in every way. It is a must read for any woman who is searching for that total oneness with the Heavenly Father.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2006

    If God Is My Lover... Why Is My Bed So Cold?

    This book is top notch and first class. Any woman who is following the word of God and being obedient to wait, instead of going the EASY route, by just giving in and giving IT up, can totally relate to this urban christian GEM (jewel). It's about time someone kept it real! Author Olivia D. Stith has given a humerous urban voice to an all to familiar battle. Her anoited way of expressing what many of us are experiencing is truly A gift from GOD. This book is MINISTRY!! I am personally Thankful for this book. This is a book that I will share with my daughter and any sister that is struggling with wanting to do the right thing. Five Stars!!!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 3, 2006

    Eye catcher

    This title will catch the eyes of any true Christian...even non- believers because so many of us has felt this way before.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2006

    This one meets the needs of so many singles

    The topic addresses the needs of soo many single Christians. This book was well overdue.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted November 3, 2006

    The Sista has flava

    I believe that there is constant deception on the parts of those who call themselves Christians when it comes to sex, alcohol and tithing to name a few. Ms Stith is trying to illustrate for the reader, that celibacy is not easy. Many of us know that it is extremely difficult, but are we talking seriously about it, are we deluding ourselves or are we pretending the issue doesn't apply to us? Of course, if we are, that is something between oneslf and God. Yes we live under God's grace. But He still requires our obedience to His word. It will be delightful, and interesting to read from Olivia Stith's posture and perspective of truth in dealing with this and similar issues. Just because you are celibate doesn't mean you don't have feelings. On the contrary. I think you can feel even more distressed because when it comes to the discipline required to allow God to be your all and ALL when you are single and perhaps waiting...the mind body and spirit must be on one accord. Its time to put the cards on the table and have a frank discussion. I look forward to it!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2006

    Thank you, girl, for keeping it real!

    I wasn't sure what to expect as I began to read the excerpt, but as I continued on your words made pulled me in. It was like a perfectly fitted glove. You knew exactly what Christian single women are feeling. And when the Holy Spirit spoke those words of truth to you I had to stop and re-read them over and over again. I can't wait until I receive my copy so that I too can find warmness in a bed(life)that is so cold. Olivia, the Lord is truly blessing you. Keep writing, keep dreaming, and keep hoping...God's not through with you yet!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 2, 2006

    This is a question asked by many single Christians

    Today, dating in a Christian way is not easy for women. It's hard to stay on Gods course and find your mate. Often times it's hard to believe that God has already sent a mate for you after once more being the bridesmaid at another girlfriends' wedding or another Saturday night with you all alone. This book helps you remember many of the things you have forgotten over the years. From how to attract your Christian mate to how to keep attracting him long after the wedding is over. It offers guidance on how to heal your spiritual self and how to enrich your mental self. It speaks to your strengths and weaknesses and as I read it I often found myself thinking 'How did she get in my head?' I highly recommend this book for Christian women of all ages because it's message is something we all need to receive.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2006

    THIS TITLE IS FABULOUS!!!!

    THIS IS A CATCHY TITLE THAT WILL DEFINITELY GRAB A READERS ATTENTION!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 2, 2006

    At glance

    the title alone would have you wanting to know more. I would recommend this book to all single ladies

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2006

    I can hardly wait

    Wow... This is a very much needed book. I can hardly wait to read it!!!!!!!!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2006

    Up and coming

    Well I must say that this book and author are ready to be seen by the world and I will be looking for more work from her.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 1, 2006

    AWESOME

    This is such a fresh title for single women who are struggling with their relation with God. Enven fot those who have a close relationship there are those times when thy wonder is it ever gonna happen. Will they ever find the right man.

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