If I Were You [NOOK Book]

Overview


Does size matter?  Is bigger better? That’s no small question to Tom Little—the circus midget with giant dreams. 

Tom may be king of the midgets, but he’s got far grander ambitions—to become the muscleman at the top, the ringmaster.  Now, drawing on some dark ancient secrets and mystic texts, he’s about to get his wish.  Imagine a pint-sized Mickey ...
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If I Were You

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Overview


Does size matter?  Is bigger better? That’s no small question to Tom Little—the circus midget with giant dreams. 

Tom may be king of the midgets, but he’s got far grander ambitions—to become the muscleman at the top, the ringmaster.  Now, drawing on some dark ancient secrets and mystic texts, he’s about to get his wish.  Imagine a pint-sized Mickey Rooney on steroids, trading up into a body like Burt Lancaster’s.  Then imagine paying the biggest price of all…. 

Assuming another man’s identity, Tom discovers he must also take on his sins, debts, and enemies.  He may be living large—but now there are those who want to make him pay for the big man’s sins.

Throughout his young life Hubbard was fascinated and intrigued by mysticism and magic.  From an old Blackfoot Indian medicine man in Montana to the last living magician descendant of Kublai Khan in China, from the Chamorro natives of Guam to voodoo displays in Haiti, he absorbed information and insight wherever he could—putting it all to marvelous use in stories like this.


Also includes The Last Drop, an astounding tale of a New York bartender who mixes some very magical drinks—to amazing effect.

“Unexpected twists…keep you guessing as to what will happen next.” —SFsite.com
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Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly

Hubbard's 1940 fantasy tale centers on a circus dwarf named Little Tom Little who becomes obsessed with the idea of swapping bodies with the circus's larger-than-life chief. This fantastic production features a large supporting cast of readers, sound effects and a variety of brilliant voices provided by The Simpsons' Nancy Cartwright. The only downside is that Little Tom Little bears a striking resemblance to Bart Simpson, so much so that the entire story is jeopardized because audiences will be hard pressed not to see a Simpsons episode playing out in their minds. As talented as Cartwright is, especially in voicing child characters, one would have expected her to come up with a more original voice. A Galaxy Press paperback.(Sept.)

Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
Library Journal

Hubbard wrote a ton of pulp stories in every genre during the 1930s and 1940s. Galaxy is reissuing all of them in paperback-80 books in all (told you it was a ton). Each book features a killer pulp cover along with other illustrations, a glossary (parts of a ship for the briny swashbucklers, etc.), and background on the author.


—Michael Rogers
School Library Journal
Gr 7 Up—Two stories from the Golden Age by L. Ron Hubbard are featured here: If I Were You (approx. 95 min.), and The Last Drop (approx. 30 min.). In If I Were You, Little Tom Little hates being a midget, along with his accompanying feelings of invisibility and powerlessness. He inherits an ancient set of books from an evil, dying professor containing the secret of switching bodies. Tom believes he has found the answer to his dream of becoming a visible, all-powerful circus ringmaster. He learns to migrate between bodies, and does so several times, encountering numerous dire situations. This is ultimately a tale about being careful about what you wish for. A concoction sent from Borneo that, when imbibed, causes drinkers to swell up in size, is the focus of the second equally fantastic story. The antidote causes the opposite effect. What makes these completely unbelievable stories so wonderfully entertaining is the excellent audio quality, the cast of talented performers, great sound effects (growling lions and tigers, murmuring crowds, etc.), and intervals of dramatic, ominous music that draws listeners into the tales and holds their attention to the end.—Mary Oluonye, Shaker Heights Public Library, OH
From the Publisher


 
“Hubbard’s 1940 fantasy tale centers on a circus dwarf named Little Tom Little who becomes obsessed with the idea of swapping bodies with the circus’s larger-than-life chief. This fantastic production features a large supporting cast of readers, sound effects and a variety of brilliant voices.” —Publishers Weekly

"L. Ron Hubbard wrote some of the most gripping and imaginative fantasy stories of the Golden Age of pulps—Hubbard’s work has influenced generations of writers, and his stories are as lively and startling as anything being written today.” —Tim Powers

“A master of the fast-action short story.” —Robert A. Heinlein

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781592125760
  • Publisher: Galaxy Press, LLC
  • Publication date: 9/8/2008
  • Series: Stories from the Golden Age
  • Sold by: Barnes & Noble
  • Format: eBook
  • Edition description: First Edition
  • Edition number: 1
  • Pages: 121
  • Product dimensions: 5.37 (w) x 8.00 (h) x 0.25 (d)
  • File size: 862 KB

Meet the Author


As one of the 20 top bestselling authors of all time, with more than 325 million works in circulation, L. Ron Hubbard stands alongside an illustrious company of writers. But he also stands alone—as an author who actually lived many of the stories he wrote.

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Read an Excerpt

“You are wondering,” said the Professor, “why I have sent for you.” His voice was very low and Little Tom had to put his ear close to the evil-smelling lips. “In your mind,” said the Professor, “you are turning over the reasons for this. I must put you at ease, for I have always respected you.”

Little Tom was startled.

“Yes,” said the Professor, “I have seen much to admire in you. On the lot about me, men are afraid. They spread away from me when I approach. But you . . . you were brave, Tom Little. You did not cower away. You had steel enough in you not only to meet me and speak to me, but you also had courage enough to risk my wrath—a thing which all other men feared.”

L. Ron Hubbard


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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 3.5
( 21 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(8)

4 Star

(2)

3 Star

(7)

2 Star

(2)

1 Star

(2)

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 21 Customer Reviews
  • Posted November 10, 2008

    I Also Recommend:

    I've never read anything like it

    This one is something special. A great fantasy yarn in the classic pulp tradition, but as fresh and original now as it ever was. I couldn't put it down and loved every second of it. If you like cookie cutter characters and demand only the pure, handsome hero, stay away. But if you like a great adventure fantasy story, with a unique main character and a whole roller coaster of twists, I couldn't more strongly recommend this story. I loved it.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted September 28, 2008

    What's after Harry Potter

    I've been wondering what fantasy titles were going to come out that would captivate me as much as Harry Potter did and I think I found it. This was a great audio book. Action, adventure, good clean fun. I really like fiction stories that not only entertain me but leave me feeling like I learned something too. This new series that is out by Hubbard is really something!

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted February 16, 2014

    more from this reviewer

    This book has two pulp stories by L. Ron Hubbard first published

    This book has two pulp stories by L. Ron Hubbard first published in magazines years ago.
    The first one:




    If I Were You -
    This a fantasy stories about a little person, named Little Tom, and a black magic magician at a circus.  The magic dies but Little Tom inherits his books even though the magician hated him.
    Thing of course go awry and body switching ensues.




    I enjoyed this one a little. I do like Hubbard’s fantasy more than sci fi. 




    The second story is : 




    The Last Drop-




    A bartender drinks adds a strange syrup to his drink and his head inflates and mob boss comes in.  The Mob Boss whole body begins to shrink after he drinks the syrup.  




    This one was strange and remind me of the scene in Alice in Wonderland.  I do not remember how it ends but I am sure it was strange because that is what Hubbard does well strangeness. 




    If you think of it these two stories are centered around plots that we have had in movies before and get redone after time. Like the first story we would probably think of Freaky Friday and the second story as I said Alice in Wonderland. Of course the ending is different for each. Decent stories  but stuff I have seen before. 

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted December 29, 2013

    Very suspenseful story. Wasn¿t sure I would enjoy because I¿m n

    Very suspenseful story. Wasn’t sure I would enjoy because I’m not a big circus fan, but Hubbard made the characters all come alive and the sound effects and music definitely held my attention!



    My mom listened with me and she said as a retired school librarian, I think this would be a good story to share with middle school students because of the moral of the story….the size of your character is way more important than your actual physical size.



    I enjoyed the short story, The Last Drop, better. It was hilarious!

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  • Posted April 29, 2012

    I Also Recommend:

    This pulp is so wacky and far-fetched that one has to admire Hub

    This pulp is so wacky and far-fetched that one has to admire Hubbard's imagination. This is the story of circus dwarf, Little Tom Little. The front flap of "If I Were You" states: Tom is "king of midgets, loved by crowds and carnival folks alike." The problem is Tom wants more than the recognition of being a "cute and dear" little man. Looking at people's shins all his life and being considered a freak has taken its toll. He has big dreams in his little body... he longs to be ringmaster. His life changes when he discovers ancient books that contain the "how to" secrets of switching bodies. Without giving away the conclusion, Little Tom Little craving a larger body, embarks on a naive, but brave and perilous journey that finds him center ring in a heap of trouble. It's an unbelievable and fantastical tale, but at the same time, it offers a portrait of the extent a human being will go to achieve his dreams.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted November 21, 2008

    Know thyself!!!

    Circus midget, Tom Little, is loved by friends and audiences but not by himself. He wants desperately to be "big". This is a compelling and revealing study of the importances of the size of one's body, one's spirit, one's strength of character, and integrity. While it takes place in the bawdy atmosphere of a circus, there are lessons to be learned, on a deep level, about the value any of us place in physical vs. character attributes. This is more than a shallow amusement. It is a revelation and lesson in who we really are and the value of real relationships. I'd recommend this to anyone who has a physical quality about themselves they do not like and to all pretty people as well.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted November 11, 2008

    I Also Recommend:

    Unlike anything I've heard before

    This one is something special. A great fantasy yarn in the classic pulp tradition, but as fresh and original now as it ever was. I couldn't put it down and loved every second of it. If you like cookie cutter characters and demand only the pure, handsome hero, stay away. But if you like a great adventure fantasy story, with a unique main character and a whole roller coaster of twists, I couldn't more strongly recommend this story. I loved it.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
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