If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom?: Confessions of a Do-It-Yourself Single

Overview

'If you doubt that God has a sense of humor, you haven't read about Kerri's love life yet!'

Discouraged with dating books written by authors who married just after puberty and then tried to give relationship advice—'I didn't meet my husband until I was seventeen, and I'm so glad I waited'—Kerri decided to write her book as a single woman in the trenches trying to meet Mr. Right.

Stand-up comedian Kerri Pomarolli shares her side of the Christian dating scene and brings a fresh ...

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Overview

'If you doubt that God has a sense of humor, you haven't read about Kerri's love life yet!'

Discouraged with dating books written by authors who married just after puberty and then tried to give relationship advice—'I didn't meet my husband until I was seventeen, and I'm so glad I waited'—Kerri decided to write her book as a single woman in the trenches trying to meet Mr. Right.

Stand-up comedian Kerri Pomarolli shares her side of the Christian dating scene and brings a fresh new light to dating, faith, and being single. In this tell-it-how-it-is book, Kerri offers a glimpse into the mind and heart of a single woman as she shares her personal stories of joy, frustration, pain, and late-night snacks. If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom? is the humorous and moving story of one woman's search for real faith and true love.

'This book is hilarious. It's perfect for the God-fearing gal who's looking for love in all the wrong places. I found myself uplifted, knowing I wasn't alone.'
—Christia Mantzke, recording artist

'Finally! We men get a glimpse of what is really going on in the minds of Christian single women! I couldn't put it down!'
—Jay Pesek, Nashville Speakers Bureau

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780310269106
  • Publisher: Zondervan
  • Publication date: 2/28/2006
  • Pages: 256
  • Product dimensions: 5.40 (w) x 8.40 (h) x 0.80 (d)

Meet the Author

Kerri Pomarolli is a comedian, actress, and writer. She has appeared on the Tonight Show and the Comedy Central channel, among many others. She currently lives in Southern California.

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Read an Excerpt

If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom?

Confessions of a Do-It-Yourself Single
By Kerri Pomarolli

Zondervan

Copyright © 2006 Kerri Pomarolli
All right reserved.

ISBN: 0-310-26910-5


Chapter One


Beginnings

While enjoying some cheese dip at a ladies' church function, I sat down near two twentysomething girls and noticed they were not wearing rings on their left ring fingers. Great, I thought to myself, I'm not alone. I was ready to meet some nice single girls and actually have a conversation that did not involve home-schooling or breastfeeding. I approached them and we introduced ourselves. My track record at church ladies' functions had involved a lot of craft circles and lectures on the benefits of making the perfect Christmas tree ornament out of old dried flowers. I was basically just there for the free food.

Jennifer told me she had just moved from Wisconsin to California and was staying with her boyfriend's parents until she found a place of her own. She briefly described her relationship: "It has been five months, and he is just the greatest," she said in that totally-in-love, high-pitched, sickeningly happy girlie voice.

I asked where she met him, and she smiled and shot her friend a knowing look. They both giggled and I immediately jumped in with, "The internet?"

"Why yes!" they laughed. "How did you know?" She went on to tell me how she logged on to a Christian dating site where she met "Mr. Right." And just like that, she's in California!

"Well, that's great. I tried the online thing and ended up with a stalker. The police were involved and everything - it was so amazing!" I said with a huge smile and more than a hint of sarcasm. I then told them I was writing a book about my experience. After hearing the title, they were not too impressed. Were there any single women left on the planet who hadn't fallen prey to the world of internet dating? Had everyone sold out like me?

I went home and dove into a bag of potato chips and some chocolate chip cookies for comfort. That was supposed to be me, not Jennifer! With the click of my mouse I was going to design my husband. Kind of like that 80s movie Weird Science where two guys had the bright idea to design the perfect woman on their computer and then watch her magically appear before their eyes. They ended up with Kelly LeBrock and that ain't bad. What a great concept! I mean, I had tried everything else - well, almost everything. Why not embrace our world of technology?

Let's talk about dating. Oooohhhh, did I say a bad word? Do I believe in the pagan ritual of ... dare I say it again ... dating? Well, do I? Do you? I mean, did the powers-that-be leave out of the Bible the apostle Paul's letters to the Americans? I'll listen to them. But seriously, the world has all these rules about dating - what to do ... what to wear ... what not to wear - and I'm confused! I know dating is a very vital part of our culture today, and I know God has an opinion. He wants my heart to be pure, among other things. Yeah, well I do too! Where's the discrepancy? Oh yeah, it's when I watch too many romance movies and start to take dating tips from Meg Ryan that all chaos breaks loose.

You know, I've actually looked up "courtship" and "dating" in a Bible concordance and they were not there. There are no little notes in red on the side of my Bible that tell me anything about this concept at all. I think people in the Bible turned twelve and were magically married by God or by their parents - case closed. Of course, I can't let it go, so I read the next best thing ... every self-help book available to today's woman: I Kissed Dating Goodbye, I Gave Dating a Chance, Boundaries in Dating, Loving Your Husband (if I ever get one) Bible study, The Power of a Praying Wife, Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts ... Ha! Obviously way before it starts! Yes, I became a self-help junkie.

So I read all these self-help books because I'm a planner and because I figured there was a blueprint in them somewhere for the perfect relationship. If Oprah wasn't advertising any Christian dating books, I'd have to find the best ones myself. I know you laugh, but these books are addictive - and all along the Bible was sitting right there in front of me, patiently waiting to be opened. And don't you think my Father God was, and still is, patiently waiting for me to talk to him about it? I have asked the opinions of 175 strangers, acquaintances, pastors, mentors, and friends ... but not of God. That would be too easy! He is just sitting up there in heaven saying, "Would you please let me handle this?" He then waits for my response. And then he waits some more - years, in some cases. He is such a gentleman and will not intrude unless asked, and then ... look out! God takes over and life is never the same. I've learned that it is a powerful prayer when we actually ask God to get involved in our lives. I did just that and this is my story - before and after.

I'm not a teacher or a preacher, and I don't believe this book has the answers to life's great spiritual truths. This is not a "how-to anything" book. Maybe it's more along the lines of "how-not-to." This book was written in the moment, as much as possible, so I could portray the emotions going on in my crazy little head as they happened. No matter what your spiritual beliefs or background, I hope my story can speak to you, and when you take my journey with me, we can laugh along the way. Remember, if you doubt that God has a sense of humor, you haven't read about my love life yet!

As I reveal the blunders in all areas of my life, my hope is that you will be able to grasp how loving, patient, and gracious our God really is. In my life it is God who has been doing the waiting. He's been waiting for me to screw up enough times in order for me to realize I can't do this alone. I can't be a "do-it-yourself Christian." It doesn't work. It's hard and God doesn't want my life to be a series of mishaps. So he just loves me, gently prods me, and waits.

(Continues...)



Excerpted from If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom? by Kerri Pomarolli Copyright © 2006 by Kerri Pomarolli. Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

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Table of Contents

Contents Acknowledgments 13
1. Beginnings 15
2. Cleaning Therapy 18
3. Boys Like Girls Named Jennie 20
4. I Love Corey Feldman 24
5. Daddy's Girl 26
6. Band-Aids and Shortcuts 28
7. Working Out and Other Miseries 30
8. Diva on a Mission 32
9. Ya Gotta Have a Gimmick 35
10. You Would Be So Nice to Come Home To 38
11. Why Can't I Just Ask for Directions? 41
12. Mean Reds 43
13. Why I Don't Watch Chick Flicks 45
14. Childhood Memories 48
15. Hold On to the Nights 50
16. Being a Cool Catholic 54
17. Me, Me, Me, and More Me 57
18. Love Me! Validate Me! 59
19. Italy 63
20. The In Crowd 66
21. What I Did for Love or College Frat Boys 69
22. Lee Press-On Nails and Tales from the Bus Stop 73
23. Mortified 77
24. Jewish Love — Los Angeles Style 79
25. Moving On — An Officer and a Lady 83
26. Changes 88
27. Next! 97
28. The Christian Chatroom: Tales from the Dark Side 104
29. He Will Reward You with Riches 112
30. The Real Dark Side Begins 116
31. Current Events 122
32. Dog Lover 126
33. Why I Don't Go to Trendy Bars 128
34. Do Nice Guys Really Finish Last? 131
35. Take Me Out of the Ball Game! 134
36. Single and Ranting 136
37. Cheating on God 138
38. Joshua 145
39. Waiting on God . . . Proactively 151
40. Last Call 156
41. Dear God 158
42. Women's Lib Is Bringing Me Down! 160
43. Enter Mr. H. 164
44. Is It Supposed to Feel Like This? 169
45. Practice What You Preach 171
46. Tennis Match 174
47. Spiritual Leader 177
48. Rock the Boat 179
49. Girlfriends 182
50. Worth the Struggle? 184
51. The Talk 187
52. One Strike and You're Out! 189
53. Watching a Movie 191
54. Reality Bites 194
55. Romance, Romance 196
56. Is There Life after Mr. H.? 204
57. What If . . . 207
58. A Really Hard, Horrible, Rotten, Lonely, Bad Day 210
59. My Best Friend's Wedding 213
60. Victorious 215
61. Sunday 219
62. My Date with a Metrosexual 224
63. Settling . . . a Little 228
64. Planes, Trains, and Chocolate Chip Cookies 231
65. She Likes You 240
66. The End? 246

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First Chapter

If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom?
Copyright 2006 by Kerri Pomarolli Originally published by Portley House Publishing 2004
Requests for information should be addressed to:
Zondervan, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Pomarolli, Kerri L., 1973-
If I'm waiting on God, then what am I doing in a Christian chatroom?:
confessions of a do-it-yourself single / Kerri L. Pomarolli. — 1st. ed.
p. cm.
ISBN-10: 0-310-26910-5
ISBN-13: 978-0-310-26910-6
1. Dating (Social customs) 2. Dating (Social customs) — Religious aspects — Christianity. 3. Online dating. 4. Man-woman relationships — Humor.
I. Title.
HQ801.P73 — 2005
306.73082 — dc22
2005027570
All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible:
New International Version. NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.
The website addresses recommended throughout this book are offered as a resource to you. These websites are not intended in any way to be or imply an endorsement on the part of Zondervan, nor do we vouch for their content for the life of this book.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means — electronic, mechanical, photocopy,
recording, or any other — except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.
Interior design by Michelle Espinoza Printed in the United States of America
06 07 08 09 10 11
• 17 16 15 14 13 12 11 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Kerri Pomarolli 15
Chapter 1
Beginnings While enjoying some cheese dip at a ladies' church function, I sat down near two twentysomething girls and noticed they were not wearing rings on their left ring fingers. Great, I thought to myself, I'm not alone. I was ready to meet some nice single girls and actually have a conversation that did not involve homeschooling or breastfeeding. I approached them and we introduced ourselves. My track record at church ladies' functions had involved a lot of craft circles and lectures on the benefits of making the perfect Christmas tree ornament out of old dried flowers.
I was basically just there for the free food.
Jennifer told me she had just moved from Wisconsin to California and was staying with her boyfriend's parents until she found a place of her own. She briefly described her relationship:
'It has been five months, and he is just the greatest,' she said in that totally-in-love, high-pitched, sickeningly happy girlie voice.
I asked where she met him, and she smiled and shot her friend a knowing look. They both giggled and I immediately jumped in with, 'The internet?'
'Why yes!' they laughed. 'How did you know?' She went on to tell me how she logged on to a Christian dating site where she met 'Mr. Right.' And just like that, she's in California!
'Well, that's great. I tried the online thing and ended up with a stalker. The police were involved and everything — it was so
16 If I'm waiting on God, then what am I doing in a Christian Chatroom?
amazing!' I said with a huge smile and more than a hint of sarcasm.
I then told them I was writing a book about my experience.
After hearing the title, they were not too impressed. Were there any single women left on the planet who hadn't fallen prey to the world of internet dating? Had everyone sold out like me?
I went home and dove into a bag of potato chips and some chocolate chip cookies for comfort. That was supposed to be me,
not Jennifer! With the click of my mouse I was going to design my husband. Kind of like that 80s movie Weird Science where two guys had the bright idea to design the perfect woman on their computer and then watch her magically appear before their eyes.
They ended up with Kelly LeBrock and that ain't bad. What a great concept! I mean, I had tried everything else — well, almost everything. Why not embrace our world of technology?
Let's talk about dating. Oooohhhh, did I say a bad word?
Do I believe in the pagan ritual of . . . dare I say it again . . . dating?
Well, do I? Do you? I mean, did the powers-that-be leave out of the Bible the apostle Paul's letters to the Americans? I'll listen to them. But seriously, the world has all these rules about dating — what to do . . . what to wear . . . what not to wear — and I'm confused! I know dating is a very vital part of our culture today, and I know God has an opinion. He wants my heart to be pure, among other things. Yeah, well I do too! Where's the discrepancy?
Oh yeah, it's when I watch too many romance movies and start to take dating tips from Meg Ryan that all chaos breaks loose.
You know, I've actually looked up 'courtship' and 'dating'
in a Bible concordance and they were not there. There are no little notes in red on the side of my Bible that tell me anything about this concept at all. I think people in the Bible turned twelve and were magically married by God or by their parents — case closed. Of course, I can't let it go, so I read the next best thing . . .
every self-help book available to today's woman: I Kissed Dating Goodbye, I Gave Dating a Chance, Boundaries in Dating, Loving Your Husband (if I ever get one) Bible study, The Power of a Praying Wife, Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts . . . Ha! Obviously way before it starts! Yes, I became a self-help junkie.
So I read all these self-help books because I'm a planner and because I figured there was a blueprint in them somewhere for the perfect relationship. If Oprah wasn't advertising any Christian dating books, I'd have to find the best ones myself. I know you laugh, but these books are addictive — and all along the Bible was sitting right there in front of me, patiently waiting to be opened. And don't you think my Father God was, and still is,
patiently waiting for me to talk to him about it? I have asked the opinions of 175 strangers, acquaintances, pastors, mentors, and friends . . . but not of God. That would be too easy! He is just sitting up there in heaven saying, 'Would you please let me handle this?' He then waits for my response. And then he waits some more — years, in some cases. He is such a gentleman and will not intrude unless asked, and then . . . look out! God takes over and life is never the same. I've learned that it is a powerful prayer when we actually ask God to get involved in our lives. I did just that and this is my story — before and after.
I'm not a teacher or a preacher, and I don't believe this book has the answers to life's great spiritual truths. This is not a 'howto anything' book. Maybe it's more along the lines of 'how-notto.'
This book was written in the moment, as much as possible,
so I could portray the emotions going on in my crazy little head as they happened. No matter what your spiritual beliefs or background,
I hope my story can speak to you, and when you take my journey with me, we can laugh along the way. Remember, if you doubt that God has a sense of humor, you haven't read about my love life yet!
As I reveal the blunders in all areas of my life, my hope is that you will be able to grasp how loving, patient, and gracious our God really is. In my life it is God who has been doing the waiting. He's been waiting for me to screw up enough times in order for me to realize I can't do this alone. I can't be a 'do-it-yourself Christian.'
It doesn't work. It's hard and God doesn't want my life to be a series of mishaps. So he just loves me, gently prods me, and waits.

Read More Show Less

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Sort by: Showing all of 10 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 4, 2006

    Loved it

    this book is for anyone who ever felt the single christian life was God's joke on you. Its truly a blessing to know we have all gone through and are going through this.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted April 11, 2006

    So Real!

    It's like she was writing my life in her book. This book has everything and you can totally tell it was inspired by God. She is completely open about her experiences and has no pretensions of perfection. At no point does it feel like she's setting up some goal or ideal that none of us can really achieve. She's just telling her inspiring story in a way that will speak to your soul. She's all at once hilarious and vulnerable, innocent and wise. If you're feeling worn-out with Christian dating (or dating in general) and ready to give up, this book is for you. It renewed and strengthened me.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 31, 2006

    The witty truth about the ups and downs of dating!!!

    This book had me laughing, crying and soul searching throughout! This is the best book I have ever read on dating! Funny, real, and deep all rolled up into one great easy read! Kerri does a fanatastic job of relaying the true feelings and thoughts of a woman trying to trust God for a relationship, all while trying to take control at the same time. I think both women and men will enjoy this book! Guys- this may be the closest you will get into the true heart of a single woman!!!

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 25, 2006

    Loved it! It's Cracking me up!

    This book is so darn funny. I didn't think being single was anything to laugh at till I read this book. Readers will probably crack up like me when they read this author's stories about being single and all the married people praying around her to get a man! Thank goodness somebody can be honest about what it's really like. It's clean and fun and would be a great purity message for teens to read and not feel preached at.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 22, 2006

    If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom?: Confessions of a Do-It-Yourself Single

    I was refreshed reading this 'tell it like it is' book in the real world of dating. Men and women will laugh out loud at this true life crazy story of a woman out there trying to 'get it right' and falling down a lot! The author doesn't give How To's or preach it's just a hysterical and sometimes touching look at her ups and downs on and offline. It's a wonderful gift for teens and adults married or single . You won't want to put it down. I loved it!

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 23, 2006

    If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom?: Confessions of a Do-It-Yourself Single

    I just finished reading Kerri Pomarolli's book, 'If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am Doing in a Christian Chatroom?' published by Zondervan. It was akin to a personal performance by a stand-up comic, which incidentally is what the author does when she's not writing books. When the TV audience tires of 'Desperate Housewives' I now realize there is a fresh social venue to be tapped--'desperate singles' We've all been there (remember?) except that few of us had the courage to recount those experiences in writing. Laughter will overshadow tears, mostly because that was the cycle of the growing and single years. You'll remember. This is one for you and the family. Rusty Restuccia Author/Corporate Consultant Ann Arbor, Mi.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 23, 2006

    If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom?: Confessions of a Do-It-Yourself Single

    After readiig Zondervan's recent release by California comedienne Kerri Pomarolli 'If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I doing in a Christian Chatroom?', my singular regret is that I didn't have this book as a resource while raisiing my own children. To this day, I'm not sure what my gang was thinking about key 'growing-up' issues during those critical developmental years. Ms. Pomarolli allows an in-depth look at how one girl interpreted and responded to the everyday challenges of social relationships. When this dad wasn't laughing out loud, I was trembling with after-the-fact fear concerning all that I didn't know or understand. This is a fun ride with education value for both kids and adults. This is writing from the heart to the heart and a great workout for the funny bone. The authors's passion for life and comedy flows through easily. It's easy to understand how she chose a career in entertainment. Well done young lady. Michael A. Smail Historian Brighton, Mi.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 22, 2006

    If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom?: Confessions of a Do-It-Yourself Single

    I read it not sure what to think .It's not a chick book only.It really related to what single men are going through as well. If you're a guy and you want to better understand what women are really wanting. This book is really helpful and also if you're a guy and you're single it's good for laughs for sure.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 22, 2006

    If I'm Waiting on God, Then What Am I Doing in a Christian Chatroom?: Confessions of a Do-It-Yourself Single

    This book is REALLY funny. There are tons of chapters with different stories that share the authors foibles in the world of dating. It starts with her fist love all the way in Kindergarden and goes on from there. I laughed a lot and think men would enjoy knowing more about what women are really thinking. This author tells us every detail in a fun clean way.Her faith that God always has her back prevails in her writing and I enjoyed that part too.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 23, 2006

    I honestly still keep this book as a road map for my future dating success!

    Awesome. That is all I can say. When I first read this book, I was hesitant, thinking I was reading a book maybe only for girls, or maybe just some weird chicks diary that she had published. Man was I wrong! If anything guys, let this book be a guide to what is going on inside the minds of single women everywhere. It is almost like you are reading Kerri's inner monolgue as you turn page after page waiting to see what in the world happens next. Who knew that truth could be as interesting as fiction? Well this girl, Kerri knew and put it all down on paper. Not only that, but she is pretty freakin' funny as well! I more than recommend this book. Now, I had better get back to sassysingles.net before they automatically log me out!

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