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If the Buddha Dated: A Handbook for Finding Love on a Spiritual Path

If the Buddha Dated: A Handbook for Finding Love on a Spiritual Path

4.1 21
by Charlotte Kasl

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Zen and the art of falling in love . . .

At once practical, playful, and spiritually sound, this book is about creating a new love story in your life. Drawing from Christian, Buddhist, Sufi and other spiritual traditions, If the Buddha Dated shows how to find a partner without losing yourself. Kasl, a practicing psychotherapist, workshop leader,


Zen and the art of falling in love . . .

At once practical, playful, and spiritually sound, this book is about creating a new love story in your life. Drawing from Christian, Buddhist, Sufi and other spiritual traditions, If the Buddha Dated shows how to find a partner without losing yourself. Kasl, a practicing psychotherapist, workshop leader, and Reiki healer for thirty years, offers practical wisdom on using the path to love as a means of awakening.

If the Buddha Dated teaches that when you stay loyal to your spiritual journey, you will bring curiosity, fascination, and a light heart to the dating process.

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher
Praise for If the Buddha Dated

“[Charlotte Kasl] adds an entirely new level of understanding to our lives through love and not fear.” —Geneen Roth, author of When Food is Love

“[This book] focuses not on a lot of basic how-to's or manipulations but on creating spiritual bonds. Kasl does a beautiful job weaving Eastern philosophy into modern day relationships.” —Janet Luhrs, author of Simple Loving and The Simple Living Guide

Praise for If the Buddha Married

“[Kasl] brings the Buddha's wisdom to the complex world of relationships. We've all heard that marriage can be a spiritual experience; reading this book, you actually believe it.” —Marianne Williamson, New York Times bestselling author of A Return to Love and A Year of Miracles

“Filled with succinct and practical advice that is immersed in spiritual wisdom.” —Brenda M. Schaeffer, author of Is It Love or Is It Addiction? and Love's Way

Praise for If the Buddha Had Kids

“Dr. Kasl provides a wonderful blend of Buddhist wisdom, practical suggestions, psychological research, and her own rich perspective of being a mother.  Parents will find this book very helpful in their efforts in promoting healthy brain development.” —Daniel Ladinsky, author of Love Poems from God, A Year with Hafiz, and The Purity of Desire

“This book brings the wisdom of the ages to bear to help parents inways that are extraordinarily inspiring and remarkably practical.You discover compassion for your child and compassion for yourself.” —Marti Erikson, PhD, coauthor of Last Child in the Woods

Praise for If the Buddha Got Stuck

If the Buddha Got Stuck provides a roadmap to freedom and greater possibilities. Regardless of your starting place, Kasl will help you achieve greater joy, authenticity, and peace of mind. . . . Encouraging, practical, beautifully written.” —Laura Davis, author of I Thought We'd Never Speak Again and coauthor of The Courage to Heal

“Charlotte Kasl's new book overflows with insight, humor and eminently practical suggestions.” —Anita Doyle, former Director of the Jeannette Rankin Peace Center, Missoula, MT

“If previous attempts to work with your life from a Western philosophical or psychological perspective encountered gaps . . . [consider this] your bridge.” —Rowan Conrad, PhD, Director, Open Way Mindfulness Center

If The Buddha Got Stuck brings perspective, inspiring stories, and useful exercises to feel less overwhelmed by life's difficulties.” —Lisa M. Najavits, Ph.D., Associate Professor in Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School and author of Seeking Safety: A Treatment Manual for PTSD and Substance Abuse

Product Details

Penguin Publishing Group
Publication date:
Compass Series
Sales rank:
Product dimensions:
7.16(w) x 10.88(h) x 0.42(d)
Age Range:
18 Years

Meet the Author

Charlotte Kasl is a licensed professional clinical counselor, a certified addiction specialist in the areas of chemical dependency and sexuality, a Reiki master healer, and the author of over a dozen books, including Women, Sex, and Addiction and If the Buddha Got Stuck.

Actor and voice-over artist Renee Raudman has performed on film, television, radio, and stage. A multiple Audie Award nominee, she has garnered several AudioFile Earphones Awards, a Publishers Weekly Listen-Up Award, and numerous starred reviews.

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If the Buddha Dated 4.2 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 21 reviews.
Guest More than 1 year ago
I've read it, I've done the exercises, I've made gifts of the book to others.Of all the 'Relationship books'I've read,this one is absolutely the best. Once I cleared the way,by eliminating people and things that were not helpful or supportive of me,I found that void was suddenly filled with the ones I had identified that I was seeking. I'm not sure I've found 'The One'-but I've never been happier about this part of my journey! P.S As a Therapist, I'll be recommending this book to clients ready to take these steps! Thank you for writing this Charlotte!!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Very helpful and insightful on how to date with integrity. I'm rereading it! Great info on Bhuddist ad Sufi principles.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This is by far my favorite book about dating. So many dating books dating focus on finding someone perfect or say you can work it out with anyone if you follow their technique. The message here is that what you bring to dating is most important.
Guest More than 1 year ago
For me, it was one of the very best books I've read. With all of these dating/relationship books/advice out there, from the Rules to aligning your zodiac sign to theirs, this read focused a lot on the common denominator in any relationship of yours - YOU! At the time I read this, it was what I needed. I've recommended this book to others. It had me asking those questions of Dr. Kasl to myself and often not liking (but needing to hear) the answer.
Seekerpilgrim More than 1 year ago
Another great book by Charlotte Kasl showing how the sometimes obtuse concept of Buddhism can be applied to every day life. In this case, she shows how the world of dating has become such a source of anxiety and frustration, everybody putting on their best face to try and find someone, all the while not realizing (or caring) that their best face isn't their face at all, just a visage of what they think others want to see. Dating, it turns out, can be fun and exciting. If you go into it with your genuine self, have no expectations except for seeing what happens, being in the moment, realizing you may or may not like the other person or results (all Buddhist views of life), you are much more likely to find a genuine connection. Even if you don't, so what? You've met people, had some new experiences, perhaps made some new friends...and yes, possibly fallen in love. Written in brief chapters, like all of her "If The Buddha..." series, this is perfect book to nibble at, digesting a bit at a time, turning into practice. If the Buddha dated, he'd have fun and be genuinely interested in people...and so should you.
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Anonymous More than 1 year ago
What can I say? I loved this book. I stumbled across it as I was perusing some spiritual Buddhist related books and after reading the overview and then sampling of the content, I decided to purchase it. Well, I have never been a believer in Buddism and this book is really not so much a book on Buddism but a useful tool in helping one find their way again in a somewhat spiritual path. I found it extremely helpful. I am going through a difficult time in my life and felt a little lost and well, I feel renewed after reading this book in one day. I am making it required reading as far as my bookmarks are concerned and using the tools this book gives you to apply to my thinking. I am buying this book for my daughter and two of my friends for a lift. Hightly recommend it.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
i was in the dressing room today with my friend at the store. i was explaining to her a situation that was going on in my life at the moment which involved a guy. well i got some interesting adviced from a complete stranger in the next fitting room recommending me this book. so im about to get it so i can learn a little more.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Guest More than 1 year ago
This book got me interested in Buddhism and it gave me a new perspective on relationships.
Guest More than 1 year ago
This book is an excellent source for understanding how to find love from a spiritual perspective. When I first saw the title, I thought what a silly book, however something tugged at me to pick it up. I am glad I did. I truly believe I found my partner because of this book. I have recommened this to all my friends and family that are on a spiritual path trying to find love.
Guest More than 1 year ago
Mostly because it tickled me. Then I went on my merry way. Three weeks later I bought this book. What a profound work. Right to the core and a far cry, much needed, from some of the other relationship books. Thought provoking, aware awakening and life changing. Highly recommended!!
Guest More than 1 year ago
This little book is packed with some much good advice. The stories are great and a must read for the person that is looking beyond the traditional ways of thinking in finding someone to share life....
Guest More than 1 year ago
I happened upon this book... or did I? This book spoke to me in a way that makes complete sense becuase so much of this is everything that others have been trying to teach me for years. This book is not just a 'dating' book. This book is a way to live life, experience life, enjoy life and love yourself and others. The author writes in a way that makes you feel that she is speaking directly to you without being judgmental. The reader realizes that experiences are just that, experiences. How we interpret them... well, read the book. Enjoy!
Guest More than 1 year ago
Reminds you what life is really about: connecting with people and giving compassion, not just filling the void with a significant other. Kasl really helps you address yourself and develop a sense of completeness so you aren't wanting, but giving--and ready for a sharing relationship. Her wise thoughts left me with a sense of peace and optimism about myself and the world in contrast to most other 'dating' books, which made me feel like I was doing everything wrong. A very thoughtful book for anyone, not just those dating.
CandaceVan More than 1 year ago
My only objection to this book is that it uses the name of the Buddha in the title, which might reasonably lead some readers to expect that it is somehow connected to Buddhist thinking, teaching or practice. It's not. The author just needed a catchy title for her book of New Age dating advice.
Guest More than 1 year ago
One nice thing about this book is that it doesn't get caught up in the whole male/female dating trap rules muck that clog the market. It asks you to be honest with yourself and others and to treat others with genuine love and compassion, which is something that is needed when it comes to male/female, straight/gay relations or any human relations. On the down side, it's mostly just a collection of common sense - there's nothing really unique in this book. Plus, as anyone who knows anything about Buddhism knows, the Buddha said nothing about romantic love. So, the book's premise itself is a little tenuous.