I'll Mature When I'm Dead: Dave Barry's Amazing Tales of Adulthood [NOOK Book]

Overview

The New York Times bestse;;er from "the funniest man in America" (New York Times).

Not everyone has to be dragged kicking and screaming through adulthood. Let Pulitzer Prizewinning humorist and nationally unrecognized voice of maturity Dave Barry make the journey a little easier-and a lot funnier-with his hilarious takes on parenting, changing self-image, the battle of the sexes, technology, health care, ...
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I'll Mature When I'm Dead: Dave Barry's Amazing Tales of Adulthood

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Overview

The New York Times bestse;;er from "the funniest man in America" (New York Times).

Not everyone has to be dragged kicking and screaming through adulthood. Let Pulitzer Prizewinning humorist and nationally unrecognized voice of maturity Dave Barry make the journey a little easier-and a lot funnier-with his hilarious takes on parenting, changing self-image, the battle of the sexes, technology, health care, celebrityhood-and even vampires!
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Editorial Reviews

From Barnes & Noble

Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist and author; the author of 30 books, many of them bestsellers; and the lead guitarist in the writer band, Rock Bottom Remainders; but in many ways, his most signature honor was being named Class Clown of the Pleasantville High School Class of 1965. His new I'll Mature When I'm Dead can be read as a sort of Magna Carta of the comic spirit. Or you can regard it as just plain uproariously funny.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781101187272
  • Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
  • Publication date: 5/4/2010
  • Sold by: Penguin Group
  • Format: eBook
  • Pages: 288
  • Sales rank: 484,075
  • File size: 460 KB

Meet the Author

Dave Barry
Dave Barry is a humor columnist. For 25 years he was a syndicated columnist whose work appeared in more than 500 newspapers in the United States and abroad. In 1988 he won the Pulitzer Prize for Commentary. Many people are still trying to figure out how this happened.


Dave has also written a total of 25 books, although virtually none of them contain useful information. Two of his books were used as the basis for the CBS TV sitcom "Dave's World," in which Harry Anderson played a much taller version of Dave.


Dave plays lead guitar in a literary rock band called the Rock Bottom Remainders, whose other members include Stephen King, Amy Tan, Ridley Pearson and Mitch Albom. They are not musically skilled, but they are extremely loud. Dave has also made many TV appearances, including one on the David Letterman show where he proved that it is possible to set fire to a pair of men's underpants with a Barbie doll.


In his spare time, Dave is a candidate for president of the United States. If elected, his highest priority will be to seek the death penalty for whoever is responsible for making Americans install low-flow toilets.


Dave lives in Miami, Florida, with his wife, Michelle, a sportswriter. He has a son, Rob, and a daughter, Sophie, neither of whom thinks he's funny.







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    1. Hometown:
      Miami, Florida
    1. Date of Birth:
      July 3, 1947
    2. Place of Birth:
      Armonk, New York
    1. Education:
      B.A. in English, Haverford College, 1969
    2. Website:

Table of Contents

Introduction xi

The Elephant and the Dandelion: (A Defense of Men) 1

If You Will Just Shut Up, I Can Explain: A Man Answers Questions from Women 15

The Heart of Dadness: A Letter to a First-Time-Father-to-Be 31

Dance Recital 45

Technology 53

Solving the Celebrity Problem 65

Tips for Visiting Miami: No. 1: Are You Insane? 79

Dog Ownership for Beginners 93

My Hollywood Career: The Big Dumpster 105

24: The Ultimate Script 127

The Full Coward Package 157

The Health-Care Crisis: Wash Your Hands After Reading This 167

Colonoscopy 187

A Practical, Workable Plan for Saving the Newspaper Business: I Sure Don't Have One 199

Judaism for Christians 215

Fangs of Endearment: A Vampire Novel 225

A Festival of Grimness 253

Father of the Groom 265

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 50 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(19)

4 Star

(13)

3 Star

(9)

2 Star

(5)

1 Star

(4)

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 50 Customer Reviews
  • Posted May 14, 2010

    I Also Recommend:

    Dave Barry does it Again!

    Dave Barry hits hard on the topics of today, and reminds you why you bothered to learn to read in the first place. A side-splitting romp that you won't be able to put down, even though, there is a chapter on teenage - American vampires, sure to sell at least 1 gajillion copies.

    I'll Mature When I'm Dead is pure Dave Barry hilarity, and my only complaint was that it was over too soon.

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted August 23, 2010

    His Best Yet!

    Now that he doesn't have to limit himself to the newspaper column format, Dave Barry is able to expand on some of his perennial topics (men-women disconnect, dog ownership, kids) to an enlightening and hilarious degree. His script for "24" and his take on the Vampire novel are priceless. I really needed a good, prolonged laughing fit, and this book gave it to me in spades. Thank You, Dave!!!

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 8, 2013

    So funny!

    Really smart, savvy humor. Hardly any foul language. Humor is "its funny because its true" style. I loved this book, find Dave Barry hilarious, and highly recommend.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted February 17, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    I Also Recommend:

    One of Dave Barry's Funniest!!!

    This is one of Dave Barry's funniest essay books. IT seems that he gets funnier as he gets older. So, I hope there is more funny stuff to come. I especially enjoyed his critique of the "Twilight" books, and his review of his colonoscopy :) good stuff.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 25, 2010

    Laugh outloud enjoyment

    One of the funnies books I've read....a great one for the baby boomers! A really laugh outloud book.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted June 27, 2010

    Not worth it

    The only chapter worth reading was his colonoscopy ... other than that the rest was essentially boring. And what was that about the teenage vampire/werewolf ... I'm glad I only paid an ebook price and used a gift card for it ... no money out of pocket from me. I would NOT recommend this to anyone.

    0 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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