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I'm Too Young to Be Seventy: And Other Delusions

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Overview

The beloved author of Forever Fifty and Suddenly Sixty tackles the ins and outs of becoming a septuagenarian with wry good humor. Fans of Viorst’s funny, touching, and wise decades poems will love these verses filled with witty advice and reflections on marriage, milestones, and middle-aged children.

Viorst explores, among the many other issues of this stage of life, the state of our sex lives and teeth, how we can stay married though thermostatically incompatible, and the joys ...

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I'm Too Young To Be Seventy: And Other Delusions

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Overview

The beloved author of Forever Fifty and Suddenly Sixty tackles the ins and outs of becoming a septuagenarian with wry good humor. Fans of Viorst’s funny, touching, and wise decades poems will love these verses filled with witty advice and reflections on marriage, milestones, and middle-aged children.

Viorst explores, among the many other issues of this stage of life, the state of our sex lives and teeth, how we can stay married though thermostatically incompatible, and the joys of grandparenthood and shopping. Readers will nod with rueful recognition when she asks, “Am I required to think of myself as a basically shallow woman because I feel better when my hair looks good?,” when she presses a few helpful suggestions on her kids because “they may be middle aged, but they’re still my children,” and when she graciously—but not too graciously—selects her husband’s next mate in a poem deliciously subtitled “If I Should Die Before I Wake, Here’s the Wife You Next Should Take.” Though Viorst acknowledges she is definitely not a good sport about the fact that she is mortal, her poems are full of the pleasures of life right now, helping us come to terms with the passage of time, encouraging us to keep trying to fix the world, and inviting us to consider “drinking wine, making love, laughing hard, caring hard, and learning a new trick or two as part of our job description at seventy.”

I'm Too Young to Be Seventy is a joy to read and makes a heartwarming gift for anyone who has reached or is soon to reach that—it’s not so bad after all—seventh decade.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780743267748
  • Publisher: Free Press
  • Publication date: 9/27/2005
  • Pages: 64
  • Sales rank: 48,777
  • Product dimensions: 6.20 (w) x 7.80 (h) x 0.50 (d)

Meet the Author

Judith Viorst was born and brought up in New Jersey, graduated from Rutgers University, moved to Greenwich Village, and has lived in Washington, DC, since 1960, when she married Milton Viorst, a political writer. They have three sons and seven grandchildren. Viorst writes in many different areas: science books, children’s picture books, adult fiction and nonfiction, poetry for children and adults, and musicals, which are still performed on stages around the country. She is best known for her beloved picture book Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.

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Read an Excerpt

As Time Goes By

I wake up on Monday,

Eat lunch on Wednesday,

Go to sleep on Friday,

And next thing I know it's

The middle of next week

And I am shaking mothballs

Out of the winter clothes

I stored for the summer

Five minutes ago,

Because snowstorms follow

The Fourth of July

Faster than faxes,

Faster than e-mail,

Faster, maybe, than the speed of light.

You want to slow down time?

Try root canal.

Try an MRI.

Try waiting for the report on the biopsy.

Or try being a child on a rainy morning

With nothing to do,

Wishing away the hours, the days, the years,

As if there will

Always

Always

Always

Be more.

Copyright © 2005 by Judith Viorst

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Table of Contents

Contents

At Seventy

At Seventy

Erotic Options

Teeth

Hmmm

Re: Vision

As Time Goes By

Soul-Searching

Still Married

The Secret of Staying Married

Not Merely His Life Companion

Body Heat

Why Marriage Was Invented

At the Opera

In the Middle of the Night

Some of the Reasons I Love to Go to the Movies

To My Husband When He Starts Contemplating Remarriage or If I Should Die Before I Wake, Here's the Wife You Next Should Take

The Children and Grandchildren

They May Be Middle Aged, But They're Still My Children

Granddaughter

New Kid Around the House

Namesakes

A Letter to My Sons About Mother's Day

What Do We Tell the Children?

Role Reversal

The Sixth Grandchild

The Rest of It

Nervous

Too Young to Be Seventy

Keynesian Economics

If We Stopped Trying

On Not Being a Good Sport About the Fact That I'm Going to Die One of These Days

At the Airport

Still Dieting After All These Years

The Rest of It

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4.5
( 3 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 3 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 31, 2011

    Gave as a gift to my mother on her 70th

    She said it reminded her of Erma Bombecks writing.
    The copy received wasn't in the best shape though.
    Some sections were dark and smudged during the printing process.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 5, 2012

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted October 18, 2011

    No text was provided for this review.

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