In Her Own Sweet Time: Unexpected Adventures in Finding Love, Commitment, and Motherhood

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Overview

At thirty-one, Rachel Lehmann-Haupt thought she had everything: a great boyfriend, an exciting career, and the promise of marriage and children in her future. But the relationship ended and she found herself consumed by a rapidly approaching deadline: age thirty-five, the time at which most pregnancies are deemed “high risk.”

Lehmann-Haupt traveled around the world and into the heart of America to explore the latest fertility choices available—as well as grapple with her own ambitions, anxieties, and personal values. A witty, poignant, and profoundly honest account of one woman’s efforts to reconcile modern love with modern life, In Her Own Sweet Time ...

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Overview

At thirty-one, Rachel Lehmann-Haupt thought she had everything: a great boyfriend, an exciting career, and the promise of marriage and children in her future. But the relationship ended and she found herself consumed by a rapidly approaching deadline: age thirty-five, the time at which most pregnancies are deemed “high risk.”

Lehmann-Haupt traveled around the world and into the heart of America to explore the latest fertility choices available—as well as grapple with her own ambitions, anxieties, and personal values. A witty, poignant, and profoundly honest account of one woman’s efforts to reconcile modern love with modern life, In Her Own Sweet Time resonates with a generation that wants it all— career, family, the perfect partner—but one that hasn’t yet figured out how to fit it all together.

Editorial Reviews

Juliet Wittman
…[Lehmann-Haupt] is a skilled, empathetic writer and an excellent researcher, alert to the absurdities and ethical ambiguities of her quest, and she has written a valuable guide.
—The Washington Post
From The Critics

Lehmann-Haupt, executive editor of Plum magazine and daughter of author and New York Times writer Christopher, entered her 30s feeling optimistic and in control. The accomplished journalist and world traveler had a great boyfriend, too-and fully expected to achieve her next goal: motherhood. When the relationship didn't work out, the author began to wonder if the love-marriage-baby sequence might not happen for her. Like countless 30-something American women, she didn't worry about her fertility during her 20s and 30s, thanks to advances in feminism and medical technology that have given women more options-and the feeling that the so-called biological clock moves more slowly now. Lehmann-Haupt does an excellent job chronicling the societal and medical trends that have influenced modern motherhood. She also describes her pursuit of a romance that will lead to marriage and family, and the choices she makes in an effort to give herself more options. A mix of science, statistics, interviews and personal narrative form this valuable guidebook. It also serves as a compelling reality check as she lists various statistics: women over 35 suffer higher rates of miscarriage; 50,000 children are born to single mothers each year; a third of these mothers choose to become pregnant on their own. In this informative and frank book, Lehmann-Haupt makes a compelling case for education and preparation: "We have more options than ever; understanding them can empower us and, perhaps most importantly, turn panic into peace." (June)

Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780465009190
  • Publisher: Basic Books
  • Publication date: 5/11/2009
  • Pages: 336
  • Product dimensions: 5.74 (w) x 8.46 (h) x 1.18 (d)

Meet the Author

Rachel Lehmann-Haupt‘s writing appears regularly in the New York Times Magazine, Vogue, O, Glamour, Wired, U.S. News & World Report, and more. She lives in Manhattan.

Table of Contents

Author's Note xi

Introduction: Starting Later 1

1 Feathering the Nest 17

2 Buying Time 41

3 Shopping for Mr. Goodsperm 67

4 Friends and Fatherhood 97

5 The Sweetness of Doing Nothing 125

6 Adventurous SWF Seeks Hottie 143

7 The Instant Family 159

8 Talking Past the Elephant 175

9 Letting Go 195

10 Gelato, Science, and a Crystal Ball 219

11 Freezing Time 243

12 The Egg Donor Economy 271

Epilogue: Summer 295

Acknowledgments 305

Notes 307

Index 317

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