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Intimacy & Desire: Awaken the Passion in your Marriage

Overview

Many couples begin marital counseling with Dr. David Schnarch with their sex lives in shambles, wondering what's wrong with them, considering divorce. One partner will complain that the other doesn't desire him, the other complains that she's married to a sex maniac. During his 30 years in practice as a marriage and family therapist, Dr. Schnarch has discovered that sexual desire problems are normal and even healthy, in committed relationships.In Intimacy and Desire: Awaken the Passion in Your Relationship, Dr. ...
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Overview

Many couples begin marital counseling with Dr. David Schnarch with their sex lives in shambles, wondering what's wrong with them, considering divorce. One partner will complain that the other doesn't desire him, the other complains that she's married to a sex maniac. During his 30 years in practice as a marriage and family therapist, Dr. Schnarch has discovered that sexual desire problems are normal and even healthy, in committed relationships.In Intimacy and Desire: Awaken the Passion in Your Relationship, Dr. Schnarch explains why couples in long term relationships have sexual desire problems, regardless of how much they love each other or how well they communicate. Through case studies of couples he worked with, Dr. Schnarch shows why normal marital conflict can be the cause of desire problems and creates a roadmap for how couples can transform marital conflict into a stronger relationship and a font of new and powerful desire for each other. He takes it a step further, giving readers simple but effective exercises that will help them reconnect with each other.
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Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
Starred Review.

Readers sick of typical glossy-magazine self-help patter about reigniting romance, or the droning pomposity of most author-experts, will be pleasantly surprised with psychologist and sex therapist Schnarch (Passionate Marriage). He immediately catches readers' attention by agreeing that the common "just do it" approach to solving sexual problems is not only ineffective, but often results in one partner responding with a decisive "Don't tell me what to do!" That kind of understanding produces a number of unexpected bombshells-including "Marriage does kill desire"-which produce an uncanny effect: getting couples to stop and reconsider their emotions, quit blaming each other, and start to think (and act) differently regarding sexual situations, behaviors and attitudes. The book's flaws are more aggravating than genuinely problematic-a tendency to lean on jargon and trademark key phrases ("Four Points of Balance(tm)")-but O'Neill breaks down complex issues with loosely-drawn real life examples, illustrating the dramatic and fundamental changes that occur when couples have a greater understanding of desire, monogamy and the brain. The process is neither easy nor quick, but Schnarch's confidence is contagious.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780825306297
  • Publisher: Beaufort Books, Incorporated
  • Publication date: 10/15/2009
  • Pages: 448
  • Sales rank: 182,348
  • Product dimensions: 6.20 (w) x 9.00 (h) x 1.60 (d)

Meet the Author

David Schnarch is a licensed clinical psychologist and author of numerous books and articles on intimacy, sexuality and relationships. His clinical abilities attract clients and students from across the globe. Dr. Schnarch lives and works with his wife, Dr. Ruth Morehouse, in Colorado.

David Schnarch is a licensed clinical psychologist and author of numerous books and articles on intimacy, sexuality and relationships, most famously, Passionate Marriage: Sex, Love, and Intimacy in Emotionally Committed Relationships. His clinical abilities attract clients and students from across the globe. Dr. Schnarch lives and works with his wife, Dr. Ruth Morehouse, in Colorado.

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Sort by: Showing all of 3 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 16, 2010

    Touchy subject, but unanticipated rewards from getting to grips with it

    Ok, here we go. Sexually, things between my wife and I had tailed off. She's is stunningly sexy, I'd always thought of myself as Prince Charming meets Tarzan, but here I was thinking I was more interested in cocoa and a good book than in wrecking the bedroom with her. What was going on?

    Well, I've learned that these days, there's a book about it. And when it comes to having sexual stalemate in a long term relationship or marriage, this is the book.

    Has it improved out sex life? Yah duh!

    In discovering that the way us humans are built, we're designed to find marriage difficult, and that's the point - in working out how to handle the difficulty, we grow. In our quick fix world, we are trained to think that either if it's difficult, it shouldn't be, so it must be broken and we're outta there, or to think that if it's difficult it's because we're inadequate and not wanting to face that, we're outta there!

    But if we're willing to do some work, and be guided through that work, then we can grow immeasurably as people, and as partners. Dr Schnarch is a funny, compassionate, tough author, who is not having a bar of his readers being any thing less that the great people they could only be if they are willing to do the work.

    Now sex is a natural expression of two deeply committed, deeply involved people, who have become that way from doing the work to find out why sex had stopped being fun. That is a whole other order of fun!

    I'd recommend buying two copies of this book, on for you and one for your partner, so you can scribble notes and not have your partner think they're secret messages! But buy it, read it, act on it, and have an awesome life.

    4 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted October 8, 2010

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    Posted January 16, 2010

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