Is He Depressed or What?: What to Do When the Man You Love Is Irritable, Moody, and Withdrawn

Is He Depressed or What?: What to Do When the Man You Love Is Irritable, Moody, and Withdrawn

by David B. Wexler, Terrence Real
     
 

Millions of women ask themselves the same question every day. They wonder whether their husband or boyfriend's short temper, tendency to withdraw, and mysterious physical complaints might be signs of some deeper problem. Is he depressed, they wonder, or what? The tricky part of recognizing male depression is that, very often, it doesn't look like depression at all.

Overview

Millions of women ask themselves the same question every day. They wonder whether their husband or boyfriend's short temper, tendency to withdraw, and mysterious physical complaints might be signs of some deeper problem. Is he depressed, they wonder, or what? The tricky part of recognizing male depression is that, very often, it doesn't look like depression at all. Depressed guys often mask their depression with workaholism or substance abuse. Sometimes they withdraw from their relationships or lash out in defensive (and sometimes aggressive) ways.

If you think the man in your life is struggling with depression, this book can help you recognize his symptoms and encourage him in overcoming his depressed feelings. The book will also show you how to take care of yourself and not get lost in his depression. It provides a range of strategies you can use to communicate with him effectively, cope with his physical symptoms like insomnia and sexual dysfunction, and rebuild intimacy in your relationship. Ultimately, the book offers compassionate (if sometimes firm) advice to help you do what's best for him, for yourself, and for your relationship.

Step-by-step advice to help you:

  • Distinguish between typical and male-type depression
  • Connect and communicate with a depressed guy
  • Help him make the most of psychological and medical treatment
  • Negotiate issues of sexual and emotional intimacy
  • Set safe boundaries and take care of yourself

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher
Is He Depressed or What? will save a lot of marriages and a lot of lives. 
-Frank S. Pittman III, MD, author of Man Enough: Fathers, Sons, and The Search for Masculinity
Publishers Weekly
The author's work as a clinical psychologist informs this book, replete with examples from his practice. Depression isn't always obvious, and Wexler offers help on identifying various types of men who may be struggling with depression, offering tips on connecting and communicating, handling intimacy and guilt--even the question of leaving. Unfortunately, the writing is a bit clinical and not as user-friendly as it could be. (Jan.) Copyright 2005 Reed Business Information.
Library Journal
In recent years, various books on male psychology have argued that depressed men often have symptoms that are quite different from those experienced by depressed women. According to clinical psychologist Wexler (executive director, Relationship Training Inst., San Diego; When Good Men Behave Badly), men "often mask depression with workaholism, substance abuse, withdrawal from relationships, and defensive (sometimes aggressive) interpersonal behavior." Here he provides guidance for women on how to recognize these symptoms and communicate constructively with their partners about their depressive behavior. Offering a range of interventions and strategies for recovery based on approaches shown to be effective with some depressed men, Wexler cautions women to take care of themselves, set limits on their partners' negative behavior, and, if that behavior becomes intolerable, know when to leave. This particular focus-on female partners of depressed males-seems unique to this book. Most of the strategies, however, can no doubt be found in similar self-help books. With a foreword by Terrance Real (I Don't Want To Talk About It), this book, which offers guidance, not guarantees, is recommended for public libraries.-Ilse Heidmann, Washington State Lib., Olympia Copyright 2005 Reed Business Information.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9781572244245
Publisher:
New Harbinger Publications
Publication date:
12/28/2005
Series:
Unassigned Series
Pages:
200
Product dimensions:
5.94(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.45(d)

Meet the Author

David B. Wexler, PhD, is a clinical psychologist in San Diego specializing in the treatment of relationships in conflict and the executive director of the Relationship Training Institute. He has trained professionals internationally on his pioneering ideas for relationship development and the prevention and treatment of domestic violence. Wexler is the author of When Good Men Behave Badly and Is He Depressed or What?, and he has been featured on The Dr. Phil Show and The Today Show; in the Washington Post, O Magazine, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, and Men's Health; and on dozens of radio and TV programs throughout North America. His work helps to educate the public about relationships in conflict and conflict-resolutions strategies.

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