Island of the Sequined Love Nun

Island of the Sequined Love Nun

4.1 127
by Christopher Moore

View All Available Formats & Editions

Take a wonderfully crazed excursion into the demented heart of a tropical paradise—a world of cargo cults, cannibals, mad scientists, ninjas, and talking fruit bats. Our bumbling hero is Tucker Case, a hopeless geek trapped in a cool guy's body, who makes a living as a pilot for the Mary Jean Cosmetics Corporation. But when he demolishes his boss's pink plane

…  See more details below


Take a wonderfully crazed excursion into the demented heart of a tropical paradise—a world of cargo cults, cannibals, mad scientists, ninjas, and talking fruit bats. Our bumbling hero is Tucker Case, a hopeless geek trapped in a cool guy's body, who makes a living as a pilot for the Mary Jean Cosmetics Corporation. But when he demolishes his boss's pink plane during a drunken airborne liaison, Tuck must run for his life from Mary Jean's goons. Now there's only one employment opportunity left for him: piloting shady secret missions for an unscrupulous medical missionary and a sexy blond high priestess on the remotest of Micronesian hells. Here is a brazen, ingenious, irreverent, and wickedly funny novel from a modern master of the outrageous.

Editorial Reviews

The Barnes & Noble Review
Christopher Moore's latest novel, Island of the Sequined Love Nun, takes readers to new heights as he writes one of the most unique and imaginative novels of the year. Tucker Case is an alcoholic pilot who flies a pink corporate jet for Mary Jean Cosmetics. His life takes a drastic turn when he meets a prostitute at the Holiday Inn lounge who is eager to join the "mile high club." He takes the young vixen up to fulfill her wildest fantasies but suddenly loses control of the plane, resulting in an extraordinary crash landing. Both the plane and his manhood are grounded indefinitely.

While recovering in the hospital, Tucker soon learns that he has lost his pilot's license and the one job he ever loved. He also learns that his story has reached national headlines as those involved hit the talk-show circuit. Case pulls himself up from his dismal situation when he gets a visit from his buddy Jake Skye, who hooks him up with a missionary doctor who saw his story on a TV talk show. The job involves flying medical supplies to a remote Pacific island — no questions asked. Through this twist of fate, Case gets caught in a typhoon, fends off attacking sharks, and gets captured by an ex-cannibal. All of these life-threatening adventures are endured with his newfound friends: Kimi, a Filipino transvestite, and Kimi's talking fruit bat, Roberto.

Barely alive after this incredible journey, Case arrives with his new friends for his first day of work. And so the adventure continues. With a mad scientist and his equally devious wife on the island, things only get crazier. CarlHiaasen,the author of Strip Tease and Stormy Weather, thinks "Christopher Moore is a very sick man, in the very best sense of the word. Island of the Sequined Love Nun is so delightfully warped and funny that no sane person could've written it."

Product Details

HarperCollins Publishers
Publication date:
Harper Perennial Series
Edition description:
Sales rank:
Product dimensions:
7.92(w) x 5.16(h) x 0.76(d)

Read an Excerpt

Island of the Sequined Love Nun

Chapter One

Tucker Case awoke to find himself hanging from a breadfruit tree by a coconut fiber rope. He was suspended facedown about six feet above the sand in some sort of harness, his hands and feet tied together in front of him. He lifted his head and strained to look around. He could see a white sand beach fringed with coconut palms, a coconut husk fire, a palm frond hut, a path of white coral gravel that led into a jungle. Completing the panorama was the grinning brown face of an ancient native.

The native reached up with a clawlike hand and pinched Tucker's cheek.

Tucker screamed.

"Yum," the native said.

"Who are you?" Tucker asked. "Where am I? Where's the navigator?"

The native just grinned. His eyes were yellow, his hair a wild tangle of curl and bird feathers, and his teeth were black and had been filed to points. He looked like a potbellied skeleton upholstered in distressed leather. Puckered pink scars decorated his skin; a series of small scars on his chest described the shape of a shark. His only clothing was a loincloth woven from some sort of plant fiber. Tucked in the waist cord was a vicious-looking bush knife. The native patted Tucker's cheek with an ashy callused palm, then turned and walked away, leaving him hanging.

"Wait!" Tucker shouted. "Let me down. I have money. I can pay you.

The native ambled down the path without looking back. Tucker struggled against the harness, but only managed to put himself into a slow spin. As he turned, he caught sight of the navigator, hanging unconscious a few feet away.

"Hey, you alive?"

The navigator didn't stir, but Tuckercould see that he was breathing. "Hey, Kimi, wake up!" Still no reaction.

He strained against the rope around his wrists, but the bonds only seemed to tighten. After a few minutes, he gave up, exhausted. He rested and looked around for something to give this bizarre scene some meaning. Why had the native hung them in a tree?

He caught movement in his peripheral vision and turned to see a large brown crab struggling at the end of a string tied to a nearby branch. There was his answer: They were hung in the tree, like the crab, to keep them fresh until they were ready to be eaten.

Tucker shuddered, imagining the native ' s black teeth closing on his shin. He tried to focus on a way to escape before the native returned, but his mind kept diving into a sea of regrets and second guesses, looking for the exact place where the world had turned on him and put him in the cannibal tree.

Like most of the big missteps he had taken in his life, it had started in a bar.

The Seattle Airport Holiday Inn lounge was all hunter green, brass rails, and oak veneer. Remove the bar and it looked like Macy's men's department. It was one in the morning and the bartender, a stout, middle-aged Hispanic woman, was polishing glasses and waiting for her last three customers to leave so she could go home. At the end of a bar a young woman in a short skirt and too much makeup sat alone. Tucker Case sat next to a businessman several stools down.

"Lemmings," the businessman said.

"Lemmings?" asked Tucker.

They were drunk. The businessman was heavy, in his late fifties, and wore a charcoal gray suit. Broken veins glowed on his nose and cheeks.

"Most people are lemmings," the businessman continued. "That's why they fail. They behave like suicidal rodents."

"But you're a higher level of rodent?" Tucker Case said with a smart-ass grin. He was thirty, just under six foot, with neatly trimmed blond hair and blue eyes. He wore navy slacks, sneakers' and a white shirt with blue-and-gold epaulets. His captain's hat sat on the bar next to a gin and tonic. He was more interested in the girl at the end of the bar than in the businessman's conversation, but he didn't know how to move without being obvious.

"No, but I've kept my lemming behavior limited to my personal relationships. Three wives." The businessman waved a swizzle stick under Tucker's nose. "Success in America doesn't require any special talent or any kind of extra effort. You just have to be consistent and not fuck up. That's how most people fail. They can't stand the pressure of getting what they want, so when they see that they are getting close, they engineer some sort of fuckup to undermine their success."

The lemming litany was making Tucker uncomfortable. He'd been on a roll for the last four years, going from bartending to flying corporate jets. He said, "Maybe some people just don't know what they want. Maybe they only look like lemmings.

"Everyone knows what they want. You know what you want, don't you?"

"Sure, I know," Tucker said. What he wanted right now was to get out of this conversation and get to know the girl at the end of the bar before closing time. She'd been staring at him for five minutes.

"What?" The businessman wanted an answer. He waited.

"I just want to keep doing what I'm doing. I'm happy."

The businessman shook his head. "I'm sorry, son, but I don't buy it. You're going over the cliff with the rest of the lemmings."

"You should be a motivational speaker," Tuck said, his attention drawn by the girl, who was getting up, putting money on the bar, picking up her cigarettes, and putting them into her purse.

She said, "I know what I want."

Island of the Sequined Love Nun. Copyright © by Christopher Moore. Reprinted by permission of HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved. Available now wherever books are sold.

Read More

What People are saying about this

Tim Cahill
This laugh a minute rollercoaster of a book is almost impossible to describe. If it were a movie, it might be billed something like this: Indiana Jones played by Groucho Marx, screenplay by Edgar Allen Poe, based on a story by Robert Ludlum and Stephen King.

Meet the Author

Christopher Moore is the author of fourteen previous novels, including Lamb, The Stupidest Angel, Fool, Sacré Bleu, A Dirty Job, and The Serpent of Venice. He lives in San Francisco, California.

Brief Biography

Hawaii and San Francisco, California
Date of Birth:
August 5, 1958
Place of Birth:
Toledo, Ohio

Customer Reviews

Average Review:

Write a Review

and post it to your social network


Most Helpful Customer Reviews

See all customer reviews >

Island of the Sequined Love Nun 4.1 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 127 reviews.
Sean_From_OHIO More than 1 year ago
Only Christopher Moore could come up with this wacky masterpiece about tropical island cultures, organ theft, airline pilots, and cargo cults. Somehow Moore, once again, creates a world that is equal parts ridiculous and believable. I don't know if any other writer could even do something like this. Its twisted in such a perfect way. I would it if Moore revisited the Shark people in a future novel. Great stuff!!
starbird56 More than 1 year ago
This was not my favorite Christopher Moore work, but it was fun. An evening reading this book was relaxing and enjoyable. It was not deeply thoughtful, or laugh-out-loud funny, but it was fun.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
As with all Christopher Moore books, this one was laugh out loud funny and poignant all at the same time. A must read for those who love to chortle at the absurd.
acschmitty More than 1 year ago
In all fairness, i have only read Lamb, Fool, The Stupidest Angel, and this one but it is nestled in the top for sure. Once again, Moore manages to to give so much heart and soul to his severely depraved and flawed lead character. The story is funny, the characters are well written and the plot advances and evolves quickly.
DeDeFlowers More than 1 year ago
Christopher Moore is a fabulous writer. All of his novels are so much fun! I really liked Island of the Sequined Love Nun. It was original, hilarious and thrilling. It was also an easy read. Basically, it is a perfect book for any time.
slatsdawson More than 1 year ago
In my humble opionion this is the best of all Christopher Moore's books and that is a powerful statement as he has written so many great books. I bought this copy for a friend and it is probably the 10th copy I've purchased since the books original release date way back when. Although this is an insanely funny story there is also an underlying story line sending a profound moral message. It would be very difficult to recommend any book over this one. Buy it, read it and enjoy!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Whenever I finish reading something a bit heavy, I look for something a good deal lighter in my next read. I can always count on Christopher Moore to provide some laugh-out-loud material with outrageous characters and an even more outrageous plot. And as crazy as his characters and situations might be, he always seems to hit the nail on the head with common human emotions and thought processes--so I can identify with, yes, even an elderly island cannibal or a bunch of natives that worship a dead World War II pilot. Moore never disappoints!
APayne More than 1 year ago
this has to be one of the most twisted stories that I have read to date - he keeps you coming back for more - that's for sure!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Starts out a little too zany. I thought "I'd rather be reading Hiaasen." But this author eventually builds his characters so that I grew to like/dislike them. Book has a good 2nd half.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I had never heard of Chris Moore before, so this book was a treat. It was funny and qwirky and entertaining all the way through.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
KanakaLele More than 1 year ago
Funny overall and definitely filled with an unpredictable plot, this is an entertaining read. As far as Moore's work goes, though, it's not his best... there weren't any laugh-out-loud funny moments in this story, at least for me.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago