It Sucked and Then I Cried: How I Had a Baby, a Breakdown, and a Much Needed Margarita

( 281 )

Overview

To the dedicated millions who can’t get enough of Heather’s unique style and hilarious stories on her hugely popular blog, there’s little she doesn’t share about her daily life as a recovering Mormon, wife of a charming geek, lover of awful television, and stay-at-home mom to five-year-old Leta, newborn Marlo, and two willful dogs..

Now, Heather shares, with biting wit and unrelenting honesty, all the other minor details of pregnancy and motherhood that no one cares to ...

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It Sucked and Then I Cried: How I Had a Baby, a Breakdown, and a Much Needed Margarita

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Overview

To the dedicated millions who can’t get enough of Heather’s unique style and hilarious stories on her hugely popular blog, there’s little she doesn’t share about her daily life as a recovering Mormon, wife of a charming geek, lover of awful television, and stay-at-home mom to five-year-old Leta, newborn Marlo, and two willful dogs..

Now, Heather shares, with biting wit and unrelenting honesty, all the other minor details of pregnancy and motherhood that no one cares to mention—like anxiety, constipation, and postpartum depression. There are lonely days, sleepless nights, and endless screaming. There’s the boredom that comes with caring for someone whose primary means of communication is through her bowels. And there’s the heart-swelling joy and utterly irresistible and totally redeemable fresh baby smell that makes it all worthwhile..

It Sucked and Then I Cried is a brave cautionary tale about crossing over that invisible line to the other side (the parenting side), where everything changes, and it can get pretty unpleasant. But more importantly, it’s a celebration of a love so big it threatens to make your heart explode. .

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Editorial Reviews

From Barnes & Noble
Don't let the pristine needlepoint and cross-stitching on the cover mislead you: This book is not something you will ever encounter at your grandmother's backyard sale. Author Heather B. Armstrong is the owner and proprietor of Dooce.com, one of the most visited autobiographical blogs in cyberspace. At her hip website, she shares her strong opinions about her life and other catastrophes, including -- but not limited to -- pregnancy, parenting, unruly pets, antidepressants, Christmas music, family gatherings, rubber spiders, and shopping.
Kirkus Reviews
Feisty blogger and relapsed Mormon Armstrong takes her no-holds-barred approach to life from screen to page as she dishes on the elation, transformation and despair that mark pregnancy, childbirth and parenting..The author abandoned her rigid religious upbringing upon hitting adulthood in Los Angeles, where she developed a desire for Interpol, tequila, her husband Jon, cursing and eventually offspring. Pregnancy delivered Armstrong to the folds of Utah and the joy of her mother, here dubbed "The Avon World Sales Leader." The Utah setting provides comic relief, as the author expatiates on her family's five minivans and the mortal sin of bottle-feeding. Describing the period after daughter Leta was born, Armstrong occasionally interrupts her account to reprint letters she penned monthly to her budding baby. Tender yet mature in tone, these convey the miracles and catastrophes of motherhood from a perspective that contrasts interestingly with the day-to-day narrative, which reflects Armstrong's blogger roots. Among the never-ending—and occasionally repetitive—string of incidents for which new parents are rarely prepared, she chronicles a colorful apology to a Starbucks cashier and a crazed hunt for a missing infant sock. Self-admittedly not a poster child for stability, the author chooses to give a leading role to her history with chronic depression rather than sweeping it under the rug. (Only her anatomy gets higher billing than her low spirits.) She's forthcoming about the strain depression placed on her otherwise solid marriage and the fact that it sometimes impaired her capacity to care for Leta. Armstrong places herself on the chopping block so fellow mothers can follow her withoutguilt through such common experiences as the debate over pacifier abuse, the horror of hemorrhoids and the agonizing slowness of postpartum recovery..A truthful picture of what it takes to bring a life into the world, exposing Achilles heels large and small.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781439171509
  • Publisher: Gallery Books
  • Publication date: 3/23/2010
  • Pages: 262
  • Sales rank: 1,410,318
  • Product dimensions: 9.04 (w) x 6.00 (h) x 0.69 (d)

Meet the Author

Heather Armstrong

Heather B. Armstrong is an American blogger who resides in Salt Lake City, Utah. She and husband Jon Armstrong have a daughter and two dogs: Former Congressman Henry "Buck" Chucklesworth, called Chuck, and Dame Eleanor Ritzford-Fitzsimons Puffs, a.k.a Coco.

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Table of Contents

Prologue vii

1 Let the Anxiety Commence 1

2 How to Exploit an Unborn Baby 22

3 A Twenty-pound Basketball With Legs and Arms 33

4 Dressing Like a Concubine in Humpty Dumpty's Harem 46

5 Labor to the Tune of Janet Jackson's Nipple 63

6 You Have to Peed the Baby ... Through Your Boobs 81

7 Sympathy for the World 95

8 It's All Fun and Games Until Someone Pokes Their Eye Out With a Baby 101

9 The Dive That Turned Into a Belly Flop 122

10 Your Biological Clock Is a Dumbass 135

11 Other Mothers: Your Harshest Critics 153

12 Trusting the Wisdom of a Dog 165

13 Finally, Proof That I Was in the Room When She Was Conceived 180

14 Heather, Interrupted 190

15 Her Screamness Who Screams a Lot Every Day With the Screaming 201

16 If Your Wife Is Pregnant, You Might Want to Skip This One 210

17 My Arms Spread Completely Wide 223

18 I Never Thought I Would Become This Woman 243

Afterword 255

Acknowledgments 261

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 3.5
( 281 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(101)

4 Star

(79)

3 Star

(48)

2 Star

(28)

1 Star

(25)

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 21 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted June 29, 2009

    I don't get it

    This book was a little all over the place; happy, then sad, then happy, then sad. A little confusing. So while the writing wasn't bad at all, the structure was off. Plus if you've been through pregnancy and childbirth yourself, her story is nothing new or unique. She's just not as interesting as she thinks she is.

    And I really disliked her tendency to use frequent ALL CAPS FOR COMPLETE SENTENCES.

    5 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted April 21, 2009

    It sucked and then I cried because I could't return it.

    I have been a long time reader of Dooce and I was excited to read this book as I thought it would provide more details and insight than her daily blog. Unfortunately I just paid $25 to re-read blog entries I read for free a few years ago. Very disappointing.

    5 out of 7 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted April 4, 2009

    It's a yawner

    I kept thinking this book was going to get interesting, but it never did. I was not familiar with Heather Armstrong or her blog because I find personal diary type blogs to be hideously boring and don't read them. This book is kind of like one of those blogs, only in book form.

    3 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 1, 2009

    Very disappointed

    I am a long time reader of Heather's blog and I just can't help but thinking she's losing some steam. Maybe if she had written this two years ago when her blog was hot, I would think otherwise. It's just the same stuff we've already read...I think she's an excellent writer, but there is no reason to waste your money on this book if you've read her blog more than twice...we've got it.

    3 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted October 27, 2009

    Boring-Please save your money

    Wow- I seriously can't believe I wasted money on this book! I used to love Heather, but I think her time may be up. I couldn't make it half way through the book. I finally just put it down and gave up. What used to be creative wit and humor is now just recycled garbage. Please save your money- there are much better ways to spend your time and hard-earned cash.

    2 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted September 20, 2009

    A good book

    I'm not a mother, though some day I hope to be. I've never suffered from depression and hope I never do. I have been a fan of heather's web site for years though and this book was an extremely good read. As someone who has never experienced any of the topics in this book first hand I still enjoyed reading this book. It's written with a sense of humor and intelligent wit which I really enjoyed. I even read the part about her time as an exchange student to my boyfriend and he enjoyed it too! Would recommend to anyone, not just new moms.

    1 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 9, 2009

    I Also Recommend:

    Not as good as I expected

    I read her blog, dooce.com, quite frequently and find it very entertaining. So when the book came out, I was excited, but I think the longer form of writing doesn't suit her style completely. The sarcasm gets a little tired after a few chapters and the attention she gives her postpardum seems sort of glossed over, meaning, the emotion that is usually infused in her writing and her ability to communicate an experience in very tactile ways seems to be missing so the reader comes away with only a surface review of what she went through. It's a fun, fast read, but not as deep as I expected.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 22, 2009

    Skip the book, read the blog.

    Like many of the other reviewers, I was really excited about this book and I had hoped it would give more of an insight than her blog... however, it ended up being just her old blog entries.

    Seriously, just read her archives and save the money. The content was good, it's exactly what you would expect from her, but it was nothing new.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted April 21, 2009

    Said what NEEDED to be said!

    I have been a fan of her website for a few months. I heard about the book and made a passing remark to myself that I should read it.

    I have been on medication for 11 years straight. I spent 8 months getting off the meds and then 3 months going through various forms of hell due to the withdrawels. Only someone with this kind of history can not only understand but appreciate when I say that my biggest fear is PPD. Not labor or when I will loose the weight but how badly can I fall to pieces. How fast can it all unravel.

    She wrote what needed to be said. So many people do not think that depression is real or that people are just to weak to face life. This book can help woman that are going through those first few months and wondering "when does the bliss part happen". Not everyone is educated on PPD and not everyone knows how severe it is.

    Is this a reference book for PPD - certainly not. Can you compare this to the great works of amazing writers - nope. But she never comes across as the know it all for PPD and she also does not claim to be one of the greatest writers of our generation. It is a book about her struggle. Take it for what it is worth.

    I personally thought it was funny and I also did not feel like she comes across as wounded by her religion, as a matter of fact I think she can totally have a laugh about it.

    So many times you ask a new mom "so how are you doing" and the response you get is "I am doing great, I am so happy, it is just bliss" Well I have some news - not everyone is happy or living in bliss. Some woman have a very hard time. Heather just happened to be one of the woman that wrote about her expereince and how she has come through to the other side.

    SoJaded

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted April 18, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    I Also Recommend:

    Not A Blog And Not A Book

    This woman is clearly very enamored of herself, which in my opinion does not make for good reading. If she spent less time making herself the hero of every situation (when she's not whining about how wounded she's been by religion, that is) and working so hard at being funny (which she actually ISN'T, poor dear) -- while making public the most painfully personal and often vulgar details of her life -- it might be different. How I wish I could have returned to me both the money I spent on this "book" and the time I spent reading it. If you are tempted to buy/read it, lie down until the impulse goes away.

    1 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 16, 2011

    Loved this book-made me laugh hysterically!

    Just finished reading this book and I thought it was both realistic and completely hilarious. I have 3 children and found this book to be a detailed and accurate account of what is is really like to have a baby. It's not the warm and fuzzy part, but the part that you only find out by first hand experience. If you are thinking about having children, it is a must read. I was surprised by many of the negative reviews. Maybe for some it was redundant as I have never read Heather's blog. My husband has always said that people who tell it like it is (as we both do) are never popular because people do not want to hear the truth. I also found it inspiring that someone was willing to share their personal struggle with postpartum depression to help all the other women in the world who could be struggling with it as we speak. I enjoyed Heather's straight forward style and you can read 1 or 2 pages to see if it fits you. To all those who have buyers remorse perhaps you should open the book and read a few pages before your next purchase.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted September 12, 2010

    amazing!!

    Laughed and cried along with her! Being pregnant now with #2 and having postpartum depression and anxiety with my first, it was easy to relate to the author and her struggles and accomplishments. I loved how it was written as if she was talking to you and even at hard times she still makes you laugh. definitly recomend this book to any new mother being dragged through the trenches or anyone looking to get pregnant who can enjoy someone elses story without getting bothered. many a nights i have stayed up just to read "one last page" before passing out. definitly not a book you will want to put down.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted April 24, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    Loved it!

    I am a faithful reader of Heather's blog. I knew this book going into it would be basically a history of her blog during the time span the book details. This should not shock long time readers. However it is much more in depth then the original blog posts, and something I would definitely read again. I would recommend any woman who is suffering, or has suffered from depression (not just postpartum) that they read this book.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 19, 2010

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted June 11, 2009

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted November 14, 2011

    No text was provided for this review.

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    Posted June 14, 2009

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted June 24, 2009

    No text was provided for this review.

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    Posted April 6, 2009

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted March 28, 2009

    No text was provided for this review.

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