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It Will Never Happen to Me: Growing Up with Addiction as Youngsters, Adolescents, Adults

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Overview

While hundreds of thousands of people are in recovery from chemical dependency, co-dependency, and adult child issues, our communities continue to be impacted by addiction. Heroin, cocaine, crystal methamphetamine, and marijuana use is rampant throughout our communities. But historically, the number one abused drug is alcohol.

Today, compared to the time of the writing of the first edition of It Will Never Happen To Me, we seldom refer to someone as alcoholic, and recognize that...

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It Will Never Happen to Me: Growing Up with Addiction As Youngsters, Adolescents, Adults

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Overview

While hundreds of thousands of people are in recovery from chemical dependency, co-dependency, and adult child issues, our communities continue to be impacted by addiction. Heroin, cocaine, crystal methamphetamine, and marijuana use is rampant throughout our communities. But historically, the number one abused drug is alcohol.

Today, compared to the time of the writing of the first edition of It Will Never Happen To Me, we seldom refer to someone as alcoholic, and recognize that if people are addicted they are often addicted to more than one substance. We use phrases like "chemically dependent" or "addict" to recognize that irrespective of one's predominant substance addiction, they need to refrain from the use of alcohol and other drugs. This has occurred for two reasons. The first being it was recognized that many alcoholics were actively addicted to at least one other substance. Secondly, that even if they did not show signs of a second addiction, they needed to refrain from the use of other substances because those other substances would often lead them to relapse in their alcoholism or to engage in a second addiction. For these reasons, the words alcoholic, addict and chemically dependent will be used interchangeably throughout this book.

"It will never happen to me" is spoken by all who have been raised in a family where one or both parents have a problem with addiction. In addictive families most children move through adolescence appearing to survive the problems and hardships of life. They abide by the laws - Don't Talk, Don't Trust, Don't Feel. The survival techniques practiced as children contribute to a variety of problems in adulthood among them depression, inability to maintain intimate relationships, marrying an addict, or becoming addicted.

Keeping the heart and soul of the original It Will Never Happen to Me, this revised and updated version moves the reader from alcoholism to addiction and addictive disorders, and expands upon:

  • Family rules - Don't Talk, Don't Trust, Don't Feel
  • Family roles - Responsible Child, Placater, Adjuster, Acting Out Child
  • Family violence
  • Shame

While continuing to recognize alcohol as the primary addiction within families, this edition broadens the concepts to include addictive disorders such as other drugs, money related addictions, food disorders, relationship, sex and work addictions.

Claudia Black offers help to the most neglected members of the alcoholic family--the 28 million children of alcoholics in America today. She shows how to understand roles, deal with problems, and break destructive patterns of behavoir. Author tour. HC: M.A.C. Publishing.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780910223003
  • Publisher: MAC Publishing
  • Publication date: 4/1/2001
  • Edition number: 2
  • Pages: 221
  • Product dimensions: 5.10 (w) x 8.20 (h) x 0.60 (d)

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Sort by: Showing 1 – 11 of 10 Customer Reviews
  • Posted August 25, 2010

    Still One of the Best Portals into the ACA Universe

    =IWNH2M= may be a bit long in the tooth by modern standards of professional practice because so much has been discovered since it published almost 30 years ago. But it remains -- along with Wotitiz's =Adult Children of Alcoholics= of the same era -- one of the two most effective portals for the family member of the substance abuser.

    Black's insights about family roles and the character of the adult child stood up for most of two decades, and even now they are only marginally off the mark compared to the mountains of new research on "insecure," "ambivalent" and "preoccupied" attachment dynamics in dysfunctional families. That Black was asked to provide the introduction to the "big red book" by the international service conference for the rapidly growing 12 Step fellowship of Adult Children of Alcoholics / Dysfuncytional Families is no surprise.

    Published in 2007, the "big red book" is =IWNH2M= on steroids, and people are buying it willy nilly and giving copies of it other family members. In my view as a specialist in adults abused a children, that may be too big a pill to swallow for those who aren't ready for it. =IWNH2M= and/or =ACOA= may be much better choices, and thus, much as is the case with Wilson's =Alcoholics Anonymous=, continuing to serve valuable functions in recovery decades after their publication.

    The family therapist who tackles an =alcoholic= family seems well-advised to read all three.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 11, 2011

    a must read

    This book was and still is the best book I ever got. I come from long line of alcoholics. From Aunts and unkles to my mom now brothers and a sister.. This book helped me understand and I really feel saved me from having this in my life more. It showed me things that no one could before. I have spent hours in thyrapy and with pastors for help. As far back as I can remember I was cring for help. I found it here wtitten in away that could be understood. You feel so alone when you come from a family like this. I am going to send it to my nieces and nephews its the best help I can give to them. I have to help them I know how they feel and are living.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 25, 2003

    Great follow up on the ACoA subject

    All ACoA people should read Claudia Black's books when starting on the road to understanding.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 2, 2003

    The undisputed ACoA primer

    This book is as true today as when it was first published. Many people do not understand and are not aware of the pain and suffering of the children of alcoholics. Especially the children themselves. It was the first book I read on the subject that put the whole ACoA syndrone into a comprehensive outline for diagnosis and treatment. A great book for children of alcoholics that has helped me tremendously and put me on the road to recovery.

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