It's So Hard to Love You: Staying Sane When Your Loved One Is Manipulative, Needy, Dishonest, or Addicted

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Overview

Smart Strategies for Dealing with People Who Are Really Hard to Love

Most of us have someone in our life that we care about, but who is really hard to love: a spouse or sibling with an addiction or anger problem, a parent whose actions frighten or frustrate you, an adult child whom you feel makes the wrong choices over and over, or a friend or other relative who can't get it together. Just because someone you love has a problem, though, doesn't mean you stop loving him or her. You don't want to let go of this person, but you do want to stop getting hurt.

It's So Hard to Love You—written by a brother-and-sister team—offers tools that will help you deal with the anguish of loving a difficult person while maintaining a sane relationship with him or her. Using the strategies in this book, you'll start to clearly recognize the negative effects your loved one's behavior is having on your life. You'll learn to accept that this person's actions may not ever change-but that your actions can. You'll find ways to shift your focus from changing the difficult person to changing your reactions to him or her. As you learn to deal with your difficult loved one on your own terms, you'll also learn techniques for managing the possible negative reactions that can arise from your changing relationship.

Editorial Reviews

Library Journal

These books are designed for those attracted to or involved with people with serious problems. In Crazy Love, clinical psychologists Johnson and Murray delve into personality disorders and the effect mental illness can have on a relationship. They describe the symptoms of 12 disordered types, including the eccentric partner, the dangerous partner, and the withdrawn and needy partner, as well as strategies for avoiding, escaping, or living with the problem. Of particular help are revelations on why the reader might be attracted to certain types and tips for making better choices in the future. In It's So Hard To Love You, psychotherapist Klatte and life-skills coach Thompson help people who are anguished by their relationship with a difficult partner, friend, adult child, or family member yet don't want to cut ties. They help readers shift their focus from changing their difficult loved one to changing their own responses. Suggestions for establishing boundaries, communicating well, and handling negative reactions are detailed and realistic. Both books would make excellent purchases and are recommended for public and academic libraries.


—Deborah Bigelow

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781572244962
  • Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
  • Publication date: 7/1/2007
  • Pages: 200
  • Sales rank: 370,824
  • Series: Unassigned Series
  • Product dimensions: 6.00 (w) x 8.90 (h) x 0.60 (d)

Meet the Author

Bill Klatte, MSW, LCSW, has been a psychotherapist and social worker for more than thirty-two years. He is currently a psychotherapist with Medical Associates Health Centers near Milwaukee, WI, and has counseled thousands of people individually, in families, and in groups. He gives presentations, workshops, and seminars to professionals as well as laypeople on such topics as parenting, anger management, and self-growth.

Kate Thompson is a writer, educator, life-skills coach, and editor. She has established and operated four social service programs on Manitoulin Island, Ontario, Canada. She is currently teaching courses in life skills and job preparation and is editing a Native studies curriculum. She has facilitated numerous courses and workshops on sexual assault, family violence, abuse, and personal growth.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 19, 2008

    My addicted husband

    This book really helped me. My husband is addicted to gambling and cheating on me with women he meets on the internet. Its very sad and i found myself having anxiety attacks. I feel more peace after reading this book cover to cover in 3 days.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
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