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Jerks: And Other Tales from a Perfect Man

Overview

in Jerks and Other Tales from a Perfect Man, John M. McIlveen presents a collection of humorous genre tales that looks at men and their relationships with a clever, hilarious, and often shocking eye. Get ready to smile, blush, gasp, and quite possibly barf!

In the novelette Jerks, Kelly learns that men are indeed beasts, first hurtfully, then shockingly, and ultimately, seductively.

In Playing the Huddys ...

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Overview

in Jerks and Other Tales from a Perfect Man, John M. McIlveen presents a collection of humorous genre tales that looks at men and their relationships with a clever, hilarious, and often shocking eye. Get ready to smile, blush, gasp, and quite possibly barf!

In the novelette Jerks, Kelly learns that men are indeed beasts, first hurtfully, then shockingly, and ultimately, seductively.

In Playing the Huddys (based on a true story) we encounter the dark side of a New England family during an impromptu, Saturday morning softball game.

In Signs, two redneck buddies' life-long friendship is tested when they read the signs.

in A Perfect Man, Jake, in his search for perfection, finds that taking the wrong road still can lead to perfection.

With Saddled Vengeance, you encounter a West that never was... hopefully.

Praise for JERKS ...

"With one book, John McIlveen has reversed the intellectual growth I've acquired from every classic work of literature I've ever read. In fact, even everyday tasks like tying my shoes have become a challenge, thanks to my newly eroded brain. Oh, sure, JERKS is funny as hell, but it has ruined my life. Screw you, McIlveen."
- Jeff Strand, author of WOLF HUNT

"McIlveen's writing is always dark and wicked. Now, in JERKS, he shows off his wickedly dark sense of humor, a love of human absurdity, and a keen eye for the bizarre details of life. The man has a twisted mind, which is perfect for our twisted world."
- Christopher Golden, New York Times bestselling author.

"There's dark fiction. There's dark humor. And then there's John McIlveen, who combines the two in the mirthfully macabre JERKS. Funny as hell!"
- Brian Keene, author of CLICKERS and DARK HOLLOW

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781482676600
  • Publisher: CreateSpace Publishing
  • Publication date: 3/3/2013
  • Pages: 92
  • Product dimensions: 6.00 (w) x 9.00 (h) x 0.19 (d)

Meet the Author

John McIlveen has written numerous stories, poems, articles, manuals and guides. His fiction has been in Twisted Magazine, Deathrealm Magazine, Metromoms Magazine, Horror on The Installment Plan, at BuzzyMag.com, in Borderlands 5 (a.k.a. From the Borderlands), The Monster's, Corner (2011 St. Martin's), Epitaphs (2011 Shroud), Under the Bed (2012 Sirens Call) , 21st Century Dead (2012 St. Martin's), Suffer the Little Children (2013 Cruentus Libri), and Eulogies II (2013 Horrorworld). His first novel "Hannahwhere" is finished and en rout to a good home, and he is well into his second and third novels, "Going North" and "Corruption".

He is the father of five daughters, an author, technical writer, and a publisher. He was born in Nashua, NH and now resides in Marlborough, MA. He works at MIT's Lincoln Laboratory.

http://johnmcilveen.com/

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 16, 2013

    Okay, so this really isn┬┐t horror. Does it matter? Laugh your



    Okay, so this really isn’t horror. Does it matter? Laugh your ass off and then decide what you want to call this quintet of perfectly crafted stories mostly about, well, jerks.

    John McIlveen has been rising through the ranks steadily through the past few years, from penning a tale in the seminal Borderlands 5 anthology to having one of the strongest entries in 2011′s MONSTER’S CORNER. Far from being a one trick pony, McIlveen writes in several genres with ease, yet when JERKS was being touted as “humor” (in a dark way), the eyebrows would rise with doubt. It’s not secret that being funny is a hell of a lot easier than WRITING funny but right here is a big, smiling surprise.

    The first story, a novelette, entitled “Jerks” has more one-liners in it than a “Who’s who” of celebrity comedians as the main character deals with the jerks in her life and runs away from the world that has screwed her over.

    Her world becomes something, well, new would be an apt word when she hits a dog. It doesn’t sound funny but let’s just say the animal survives and alters her life in a way that is sure to turn heads.

    “Playing The Huddys,” (based on a true story) is hysterical in a baseball by way of “Deliverance” while “Signs” is just flat out wrong in so many ways – all of them just right.

    “The Perfect Man” seems like something not out of place in New Orleans, the setting of the story, but too short. All of them are – the laughs could go on for much, much longer.

    JERKS closes with “Saddled Vengeance,” a story that just needs to be read and is a fine choice to close out the collection.

    McIlveen has shown his unique storytelling chops for years now and JERKS is a great buy. Recommended for anyone who enjoys a great story and full belly laugh.

    — Dave Simms - Horror World
    Apr 15, 2013

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