Joy of Gay Sex

Joy of Gay Sex

3.9 62
by Charles Silverstein, Felice Picano
     
 

View All Available Formats & Editions

First published in 1977, The Joy of Gay Sex became an immediate bestseller and a touchstone of the emerging gay consciousness, offering a delectable first glimpse of gay life and love for countless gay men. Throughout the 1980s and 1990s, it has remained an essential reference for gay men worldwide.

The changes to gay life over the past decade, for

…  See more details below

Overview

First published in 1977, The Joy of Gay Sex became an immediate bestseller and a touchstone of the emerging gay consciousness, offering a delectable first glimpse of gay life and love for countless gay men. Throughout the 1980s and 1990s, it has remained an essential reference for gay men worldwide.

The changes to gay life over the past decade, for better and for worse, are reflected in this fully revised and expanded new third edition. Noted psychologist Dr. Charles Silverstein has teamed up once again with critically acclaimed novelist Felice Picano, updating every single entry and adding nearly thirty new entries. The authors have succeeded in bringing the book up to date for a new century and a new generation of readers while maintaining its signature brand of positive, permissive, and responsible advice.

Invaluable as a sex guide, a resource on building self-esteem, and a coming-out guide for young gay men, The Joy of Gay Sex covers the ins and outs of gay life alphabetically from "anus" to "wrestling." The authors continue to provide advice about safe sex in all of its varieties, from techniques and positions to fostering intimacy and creativity in relationships. They also address the many emotional and relationship-oriented issues in gay life, such as loneliness, depression, and letting go. Expanded entries provide cutting-edge health information on the newest treatments for HIV, strategies for avoiding STDs, and tips for getting the best care from your doctor.

The Joy of Gay Sex serves as a general reference on a number of diverse topics important to gay life and culture, ranging from the history of the gay rights movement to the history of condoms, from body decoration to spirituality. Scores of new entries address topics such as on-line dating, cosmetic surgery, coming out at work, sexual harassment, and much more. Acclaimed artist Joseph Phillips spices up the proceedings with fifty new illustrations.

Read More

Editorial Reviews

Library Journal
Psychologist Silverstein and Picano, a published novelist and poet, have expanded this classic (first published in 1977 and last updated in 1993) with more than 100 pages and 30 new entries and strengthened coverage of cautionary topics while not stinting on pleasure, fun, and games. They excel in their discussion of HIV, drugs, and medical, social, and psychological topics; however, the attractive, erotic illustrations should have been supplemented by a few diagrams and charts. A lengthy resource section at the end features many organizational referrals but is less comprehensive for books and web sites-and is curiously light on books about gay sex. This book is recommended for public libraries as the longest-running, most recent, and most comprehensive gay male sex manual, but librarians should also consider Jack Hart's Gay Sex (2d ed.), which, although dated, is especially strong on sex techniques and variations and includes many more web sites and more sex books in the bibliography. Specialty manuals like Jack Morin's Anal Pleasure & Health and the "Ultimate Guide" series from Cleis Press are also suggested. And don't neglect lesbians-start with Felice Newman's The Whole Lesbian Sex Book.-Martha Cornog, Philadelphia Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9780060012731
Publisher:
HarperCollins Publishers
Publication date:
05/13/2003
Edition description:
Revised and Expanded Edition
Pages:
336
Product dimensions:
7.00(w) x 9.12(h) x 0.98(d)

Related Subjects

Read an Excerpt

The Joy of Gay Sex

Fully Revised and Expanded Third Edition
By Silverstein, Charles

HarperResource

ISBN: 0060012749

Anus

Culturally induced ears have given many people phobias about their assholes. This bias against the anus is unreasonable. True, it is used for elimination, but so is the penis -- yet that objection has not made the latter organ any less attractive. The anus is not only an avenue for elimination but also a sexual organ. It is highly sensitive, as it is lined with particularly responsive nerve endings. Moreover, the anus is close to the prostate gland, and its stimulation is highly pleasurable.

All trace of shit can be banished if one takes an enema before intercourse. Every drugstore sells disposable enemas or convenient bulb-shaped plastic ones. Most men who use them regularly keep them in their shower. Daily use of enemas, however, should be avoided, as it could create psychological dependence and/or physical damage to the small intestines. People who are just beginning to experiment with anal sex sometimes fear that sticking a large cock up the anus will tear the skin; proper lubrication and relaxation, however, will prevent pain or damage (see First Time).

More experienced men often worry that by repeatedly getting fucked they will lose muscle tone in their asshole. There is no research on this problem, but it seems that many of these worries are probably unfounded and may cover up feelings of guilt (see Guilt). One occasionally finds gay men who disparage achieving sexual pleasure through their anuses. This might be a result of low self-esteem caused by the archaic notion that only women get fucked. This is both an insult to their own bodies and historically wrong, since men have found pleasure in their assholes since the time of the cavemen, as we've learned from pictographs.

Barebacking

Barebacking -- fucking without a condom -- is the single most dangerous sex practice there is (see Dangerous Sex). As a method of sexual gratification, it's as old as recorded history. Until the arrival of AIDS, gay men never used condoms when fucking. In fact, pulling out before you came was considered rude. Until the mid-1980s, condoms were deemed kinky, a sex toy among gay men (see Condoms). The AIDS epidemic caused a change in our way of having sex. As of December 2000, 775,000 people in the United States had been diagnosed with AIDS (the figure for HIV disease is much higher). One-half million have died (see HIV Disease). The worldwide statistics are even more alarming. Since we know so much about the transmission of the virus, fucking someone without a condom is equivalent to two men playing Russian roulette with each other.

Younger men seem to be more attracted to barebacking. Perhaps these risk-taking men haven't watched the slow death of lovers and friends. For them,AIDS is history, like their learning about the Vietnam War. It's simply not in their experience, as it is for an older generation of gay men. That's too bad, because it's a statistical certainty that some of them are going to pay a price -- the diagnosis of HIV disease.

It would be a mistake, however, to look at barebacking only from a moral perspective. Recent research informs us that emotional problems influence a gay man's sexual behavior, including his contribution in transmitting the HIV. Depression is the main culprit. Gay men who are depressed, including both acute and chronic depression, are far more likely to participate in unsafe sex (see Depression; Safe Sex). Men with impulsive personalities, especially excitement seekers, are another category of psychologically impaired gay men. They generally describe themselves as "spontaneous," a claim that is untrue. A man who is spontaneous can make voluntary choices about his behavior; an impulsive man cannot. Both depression and impulsiveness can be effectively treated by both medication and psychotherapy.

If you have a friend who is endangering his life by barebacking, ask yourself whether psychological problems might be the cause. If so, taking a moral approach won't change his behavior (nor will accusing him of stupidity). Help him to make an appointment with a shrink, but only one well versed in gay sex and HIV research.

How does a responsible gay man (like you) fulfill his sexual desires, but not endanger himself and other gay men? If you're going to fuck, carry condoms. Have them in your night table in your bedroom. Insist that your sex partner use one if he's going to fuck you -- "Put the condom on or put your clothes on." Ignore the entreaties of a man who says, "You can fuck me without a condom," especially since you can be sure that he said the same thing to the man who fucked him last night, and the night before, and ...(see Sexually Transmitted Diseases). If, for some reason -- either you are under the influence of alcohol or recreational drugs or a mix of both -- you do bareback, be sure to get tested about a month later (see Booze and Highs; Drug Abuse; Drugs and Sex).If you test negative,get tested again in two more months. If you believe that the man who fucked you might be HIV-positive, treatment with AZT is available.

There may be a day when condoms are no longer necessary because AIDS scientists have successfully produced a vaccine. That's still years off. In the meantime, lovers who are both HIV-negative and who never trick out need not worry about the HIV or STDs.

Continues...

Excerpted from The Joy of Gay Sex by Silverstein, Charles Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

Read More

Meet the Author

Dr. Charles Silverstein is a licensed psychologist in private practice in New York City. He is best known for his presentation before the Nomenclature Committee of the American Psychiatric Association that led to the removal of homosexuality as a mental illness from the organization’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual.

Felice Picano’s first book was a finalist for the PEN/ Hemingway Award. Since then, he has published twenty volumes of fiction, poetry, and memoirs. Considered a founding member of modern gay literature along with other members of the Violet Quill Club, he founded two publishing companies: SeaHorse Press and Gay Presses of New York. Among his award-winning books are the novels Like People in History, The Book of Lies, and Onyx. He lives in Los Angeles.

Customer Reviews

Average Review:

Write a Review

and post it to your social network

     

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

See all customer reviews >

Joy of Gay Sex 3.9 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 62 reviews.
Guest More than 1 year ago
Awesome book, my partner Teddy and I loved this book. It was very helpful in awkward situations. I think that it has helped better our relationship because we are now having great sex.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This book changed my life. I break up with my wife and did my coworker. Now we live together. Thanks to this book.
Guest More than 1 year ago
this book is thorough, frank, and truly just a good read. Not only does it give amazing pointers for your sex life, it also gives an in depth look at things that many gay men face. when you're coming out of the closet, people should be passing this book out like bibles.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I just got this book not too long ago and I must say that it is one the best informative and somewhat funny pieces of literature I have in my library.
I would recommend this book to anyone who is a homosexual or would just like to know a little or a lot more about "The Joy of Gay Sex".
Guest More than 1 year ago
I am a counseling psychologist and a sex educator and I recommend this book to my gay and bisexual clients who are seeking to gain a better understanding of the in and outs of male /male intimacy and sexuality. The book is well written and covers a wide range of topics and issues.
Guest More than 1 year ago
Every gay man should make time to read this book. They might learn a thing or two
Guest More than 1 year ago
This is the number 1 book if your looking for better ways of sex for you and you partner. My Partner and I were running out of things to do but thanks to this book we have more than 20 new things to do.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
this book is long but totally worth it.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
if anyone wants, im a bisexual guy and really horny. looking for some sex ;) guys and girls welcome. Email me at jsx10bz@js.x10.bz
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Virgin that need some help
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I want to have sex
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Walks in
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Walks in ho.rny
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Walks in
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Walks in
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Im gay and seventeen my kik is savion_1122
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Ugly lame and desperate is calling. He wants to talk.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This is an e book review spot only and a billion people use it for talking like minecraft servers please stop taking about it but ... im peter and im in hs abd im dating va boy named Michael
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Why are these reviews people looking for a hook up, This is an e-book I wanted to know whether it was good or not you guys come on.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I want it too.we dont need numbers.just start this thing off and i will join
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Follow the story line
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Adam and eve are the sexiest couple wake up people gay is a sin at least i speak the truth
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I will give it to u
Anonymous More than 1 year ago