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A survey sent out to our contractors posed the question, “What motivates you to come to work every day?” One guy answered, “Probation officer.”
One of the less difficult blanks to fill in on our job-agency application is "Position Wanted." One job seeker wrote "Sitting."
—Flo Traywick, Lynchburg, Virginia
What do you call twin policemen? Copies.
My sister Angela was impressed by a job applicant's confidence. "How will you gain your coworkers' respect?" she asked. The reply: "Mainly through my misdemeanor."
—Gretchen Duff, Bethlehem, Pennsylvania
My laptop was driving me crazy. “The A, E, and I keys always stick,” I complained to a friend.
She quickly diagnosed the problem. “Your computer is suffering from irritable vowel syndrome.”
My coworker at the hotel was miserable at his job and was desperately searching for a new one.
"Why don't you work for your mother?" I suggested.
He shook his head. "I can't," he said. "Her company has a very strict policy against hiring relatives."
"Who made up that ridiculous rule?"
—Doug Barilla, Milwaukee, Wisconsin