Looking for Palestine: Growing Up Confused in an Arab-American Family

Looking for Palestine: Growing Up Confused in an Arab-American Family

4.0 9
by Najla Said
     
 

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A frank and entertaining memoir, from the daughter of Edward Said, about growing up second-generation Arab American and struggling with that identity.

The daughter of a prominent Palestinian father and a sophisticated Lebanese mother, Najla Said grew up in New York City, confused and conflicted about her cultural background and identity. Said knew that her

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Overview

A frank and entertaining memoir, from the daughter of Edward Said, about growing up second-generation Arab American and struggling with that identity.

The daughter of a prominent Palestinian father and a sophisticated Lebanese mother, Najla Said grew up in New York City, confused and conflicted about her cultural background and identity. Said knew that her parents identified deeply with their homelands, but growing up in a Manhattan world that was defined largely by class and conformity, she felt unsure about who she was supposed to be, and was often in denial of the differences she sensed between her family and those around her. The fact that her father was the famous intellectual and outspoken Palestinian advocate Edward Said only made things more complicated. She may have been born a Palestinian Lebanese American, but in Said’s mind she grew up first as a WASP, having been baptized Episcopalian in Boston and attending the wealthy Upper East Side girls’ school Chapin, then as a teenage Jew, essentially denying her true roots, even to herself—until, ultimately, the psychological toll of all this self-hatred began to threaten her health.

As she grew older, making increased visits to Palestine and Beirut, Said’s worldview shifted. The attacks on the World Trade Center, and some of the ways in which Americans responded, finally made it impossible for Said to continue to pick and choose her identity, forcing her to see herself and her passions more clearly. Today, she has become an important voice for second-generation Arab Americans nationwide.

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Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
Said’s aching memoir explores her coming-of-age as a Christian Arab-American on New York’s Upper West Side. Her father, Palestinian-American scholar and human-rights activist Edward Said, was always her “temperamental soul mate”—passionate about art and literature, but not good with practical details—while her Lebanese-American mother managed daily life with aplomb. Said describes feeling divided by her open-minded, heterogeneous neighborhood near Columbia University. Her birth in 1974 coincided with the start of Lebanon’s decades-long civil war and continually exacerbated anxieties about her “otherness.” She relates how the escalating violence and growing anti-Arab sentiment in the U.S. eroded her self-confidence and contributed to an eating disorder. She admits to resenting her parents’ secular-humanist ideals as a child, and her brother’s smoother mix of Arab and American, heightening her feelings of “otherness.” Some readers may find her use of “Daddy” and “Mommy” oddly regressive, but these terms nicely reveal what she really desired from her parents. Empowering experiences like taking acting classes and joining an Arab-American theater group balance unsettling accounts of a harrowing 1992 visit to Gaza and her father’s 2003 death. Her complex persona, self-deprecating humor, and focus on the personal rather than the political broaden the appeal of Said’s book beyond any particular ethnic, cultural, or religious audience. (Aug.)
Kirkus Reviews
In an illuminating memoir, the daughter of Edward Said, the writer, academic and symbol of Palestinian self-determination, explores her complex family history and its role in shaping her identity. The author grappled with her convoluted family tree as a child, but she has grown weary trying to make sense of the conflicting information she has gathered. "I am a Palestinian-Lebanese-American Christian woman, but I grew up as a Jew in New York City. I began my life, however as a WASP," she writes. Said comes from a warm, loving home often populated by visiting literary celebrities such as Lillian Hellman and Cornel West, and she is confused by what others say regarding Arab culture. "I resigned myself to believing that everything people said about my culture was true," she writes, "because it was exhausting and futile to try to convince anyone otherwise." The author was a high achiever attending Princeton, yet she also battled anorexia. Following a family trip to the Middle East, including her father's homeland of Palestine, Said learned more about her family history. Her perspective shifted when she realized how little she knew about conditions in the Middle East, especially Gaza. As for many, Said's life changed following 9/11. To many Americans, the author became part of a group, an Arab-American. Said joined an Arab-American theater group, exploring and enlarging the boundaries of her identity. Following her father's death, the author spent a summer alone in Lebanon. During her visit, she discovered a compelling connection to the land and people and, ultimately, herself. An enlightening, warm, timely coming-of-age story exploring the author's search for identity framed within the confounding maze of America's relationship with the Middle East.

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Product Details

ISBN-13:
9781594487088
Publisher:
Penguin Publishing Group
Publication date:
08/01/2013
Pages:
272
Sales rank:
392,070
Product dimensions:
5.90(w) x 8.36(h) x 0.94(d)
Age Range:
18 Years

What People are saying about this

Hanan Al-Shaykh
In this account of her search for identity and heritage, Najla Said has achieved something remarkable. Looking for Palestine is Said's powerful story of learning to rescue her own stranded self, with the help of her wise and loving parents.—Hanan Al-Shaykh, author of The Story of Zahra
Moustafa Bayoumi
A deeply penetrating, often hilarious, and occasionally devastating account of growing up Arab American. Of course, Najla Said's scramble for her identity is uniquely hers. How many of us, after all, have had world-famous intellectuals as fathers, experienced the civil war in Lebanon first hand, and been kissed on the cheek by Yasir Arafat (which she hated)? But after finally finding the conviction to be at peace with herself, Najla Said has written more than a memoir. Looking for Palestine is a survivor's guide for all of us who live with that feeling of being out of place wherever we are.—Moustafa Bayoumi, author of How Does it Feel to Be a Problem?: Being Young and Arab in America
Professor Cornell West
Najla Said's Looking for Palestine is a compassionate and candid book on her courageous coming-of-age in contemporary America. Said is a brilliant, talented and sensitive artist with a larger-than-life, loving father.—Professor Cornell West
From the Publisher
"The scholar Edward Said was born in Jerusalem when it was Palestine under the British Mandate, immigrated to the U.S., was baptized an Episcopalian, supported Palestinian independence, married a Lebanese Quaker, and became a prominent professor at Columbia University. No wonder his daughter, Najla, was conflicted about her identity. If Edward’s Orientalism provides the intellectual framework for understanding postcolonialism, Najla’s memoir, Looking for Palestine, is the other side of the coin, as those same complex forces tug her life in multiple directions while she tries to understand who she is."—Daily Beast

"In her engaging memoir, Looking for Palestine, Najla Said explores the cultural confusions of growing up Arab-American in the1970s and '80s New York City."—Elle

“What proves substantive and memorable about this book . . is the author's exploration of her relationship with her family and her social surroundings. . . . her snapshots of personal interaction with her father and their sometimes droll exchanges give the book an undeniably warm and intimate feel.”—San Francisco Chronicle

"Said's aching memoir explores her coming-of-age as a Christian Arab-American on New York's Upper West Side. . . . [Said's] complex persona, self-deprecationg humor, and focus on the personal rather than the political broaden the appeal of Said's book beyond any particular ethnic, cultural, or religious audience."—Publishers Weekly (starred review)

"In an illuminating memoir, the daughter of Edward Said, the writer, academic and symbol of Palestinian self-determination, explores her complex family history and its role in shaping her identity. . . . An enlightening, warm, timely coming-of-age story exploring the author’s search for identity framed within the confounding maze of America’s relationship with the Middle East."—Kirkus

“It can be a difficult story to tell: that of one's discontent in the midst of privilege. And yet with great skill, humor, and poignancy, Ms. Said accomplishes just that. In the end, she is her late father's great inheritor, ever-journeying toward that elusive home.”—Alica Erian, author of Towelhead

“Najla Said’s Looking for Palestine is a compassionate and candid book on her courageous coming-of-age in contemporary America. Said is a brilliant, talented and sensitive artist with a larger-than-life, loving father.”—Professor Cornel West

“A deeply penetrating, often hilarious, and occasionally devastating account of growing up Arab American. Of course, Najla Said’s scramble for her identity is uniquely hers. How many of us, after all, have had world-famous intellectuals as fathers, experienced the civil war in Lebanon first hand, and been kissed on the cheek by Yasir Arafat (which she hated)? But after finally finding the conviction to be at peace with herself, Najla Said has written more than a memoir. Looking for Palestine is a survivor’s guide for all of us who live with that feeling of being out of place wherever we are.”—Moustafa Bayoumi, author of How Does it Feel to Be a Problem?: Being Young and Arab in America

“Thoughtful, searching, and open-eyed, Looking for Palestine takes readers on a journey into an Arab-American girl’s search for identity. The joy and pain of growing up in the long shadow of a brilliant parent, the struggle for meaning and belonging, and the painful dispossession of the Palestinians are all treated with tender care as Najla Said gives us a haunting and singular life story.”—Diana Abu-Jaber, author of Crescent

author of Towelhead - Alica Erian
It can be a difficult story to tell: that of one's discontent in the midst of privilege. And yet with great skill, humor, and poignancy, Ms. Said accomplishes just that. In the end, she is her late father's great inheritor, ever-journeying toward that elusive home.
Diana Abu-Jaber
Thoughtful, searching, and open-eyed, Looking for Palestine takes readers on a journey into an Arab-American girl's search for identity. The joy and pain of growing up in the long shadow of a brilliant parent, the struggle for meaning and belonging, and the painful dispossession of the Palestinians are all treated with tender care as Najla Said gives us a haunting and singular life story.—Diana Abu-Jaber, author of Crescent

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