Love Is a Story: A New Theory of Relationships

Love Is a Story: A New Theory of Relationships

by Robert J. Sternberg
     
 

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ISBN-10: 0195131029

ISBN-13: 9780195131024

Pub. Date: 06/28/1999

Publisher: Oxford University Press

In this groundbreaking work, Robert Sternberg opens the book of love and shows you how to discover your own story—and how to read your relationships in a whole new light.
What draws us so strongly to some people and repels us from others? What makes some relationships work so smoothly and others burst into flames? Sternberg gives us new answers to these

Overview

In this groundbreaking work, Robert Sternberg opens the book of love and shows you how to discover your own story—and how to read your relationships in a whole new light.
What draws us so strongly to some people and repels us from others? What makes some relationships work so smoothly and others burst into flames? Sternberg gives us new answers to these questions by showing that the kind of relationship we create depends on the kind of love stories we carry inside us. Drawing on extensive research and fascinating examples of real couples, Sternberg identifies 26 types of love story—including the fantasy story, the business story, the collector story, the horror story, and many others—each with its distinctive advantages and pitfalls, and many of which are clashingly incompatible. These are the largely unconscious preconceptions that guide our romantic choices, and it is only by becoming aware of the kind of story we have about love that we gain the freedom to create more fulfilling and lasting relationships. As long as we remain oblivious to the role our stories play, we are likely to repeat the same mistakes again and again. But the enlivening good news this book brings us is that though our stories drive us, we can revise them and learn to choose partners whose stories are more compatible with our own.
Quizzes in each chapter help you to see which stories you identify with most strongly and which apply to your partner. Are you a traveler, a gardener, a teacher, or something else entirely? Love is a Story shows you how to find out.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9780195131024
Publisher:
Oxford University Press
Publication date:
06/28/1999
Edition description:
New Edition
Pages:
256
Product dimensions:
8.80(w) x 5.60(h) x 0.80(d)

Related Subjects

Table of Contents

PREFACE ix
I THE STORIES WE TELL
3(46)
Love as a Story
3(10)
Our Multiple Stories of Love
13(8)
Story Elements
21(5)
Some Kinds of Stories
26(5)
Where Do Stories Come From, and Where Can They Go?
31(18)
II LOVE STORIES
49(170)
Asymmetrical Stories
49(41)
The Teacher-Student Story
49(6)
The Sacrifice Story
55(5)
The Government Story
60(8)
The Police Story
68(7)
The Pornography Story
75(7)
The Horror Story
82(8)
Object Stories
90(45)
PERSON AS OBJECT
90(18)
The Science-Fiction Story
90(6)
The Collection Story
96(6)
The Art Story
102(6)
RELATIONSHIP AS OBJECT
108(27)
The House and Home Story
109(6)
The Recovery Story
115(6)
The Religion Story
121(6)
The Game Story
127(8)
Coordination Stories
135(30)
The Travel Story
135(6)
The Sewing and Knitting Story
141(6)
The Garden Story
147(5)
The Business Story
152(5)
The Addiction Story
157(8)
Narrative Stories
165(28)
The Fantasy Story
165(6)
The History Story
171(8)
The Science Story
179(6)
The Cookbook Story
185(8)
Genre Stories
193(26)
The War Story
193(5)
The Theater Story
198(6)
The Humor Story
204(5)
The Mystery Story
209(10)
III IMPLICATIONS
219(12)
Testing the Story View
219(6)
What Is Love?
225(6)
NOTES 231(6)
INDEX 237

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