Marriage and Family: The Quest for Intimacy / Edition 8

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Overview

This text combines a positive and practical approach to the study of marriage and family life. It is based on extensive and up-to-date research as reported in the journals and monographs. It shows how sociological theories apply to the various topics. Thus, it not only provides students with a basic understanding of marriage and family life, but also helps them apply this knowledge to enrich their lives and nurture their own intimate relationships.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780078111624
  • Publisher: McGraw-Hill Higher Education
  • Publication date: 6/7/2011
  • Edition description: New Edition
  • Edition number: 8
  • Pages: 480
  • Sales rank: 68,646
  • Product dimensions: 7.90 (w) x 9.90 (h) x 0.80 (d)

Meet the Author

Robert Lauer received his B.S. and Ph.D. from Washington University, his B.D. from Southern Seminary, and his M.A. from Southern Illinois University. Representatives may reach him at rjlauer@aol.com.

Jeanette C. Lauer is a Research Professor at Alliant International University. She received her Ph.D. in Social History from Washington University, St. Louis. She has published numerous journal articles and co-authored fifteen books. Most recently she co-authored Becoming Family: Building a Stepfamily that Really Works. She is a member of the National Council on Family Relations, and the Stepfamily Association of America.

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Table of Contents

PART l. THE CONTEXT OF INTIMACY

l. AMERICAN MYTHS AND DREAMS

Learning Objectives

Myths About Family Life
We've Lost the Extended Family
Opposites Attract
People Marry Because They Love Each Other
Having Children Increases Marital Satisfaction
A Good Sex Life Is the Best Predictor of Marital
Satisfaction
Happily Married People Don’t Have Conflict
Half of All Marriages End In Divorce
The Dangers of Myths

Changing Patterns of Intimate Relationships

Premarital Sex
Births to Unmarried Women
Living Alone

COMPARISON

Asian Women Are Marrying at a Later Age
Cohabitation
Delayed Marriage
Birth Rates
Household Size
Employed Mothers

PERSONAL

“I Had to Go to Work”
Divorce
A Concluding Note On Changing Patterns

The Family in Utopia

The Family in Utopian Writings
The Family in Utopian Communities
What Works Best?

What Do We Want? What Do We Need?

The Great Debate
Changes in Traditional Arrangements

What Do You Think?

Me or We?
Strengths and Benefits of Marriage and Family

'Til Death?

A Note On Theory
Systems Theory
Exchange Theory
Symbolic Interaction Theory
Conflict Theory
Theory and Intimacy
Summary

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

American Myths and Dreams

2. DIVERSITY IN FAMILIES

Learning Objectives

The Variability of Family Life
Variations Between Societies
Variations Within Societies

TheSingle-Parent Family

Extent of Single-Parent Families
Challenges of the Single-Parent Family

COMPARISON

Single Parents In Iceland
The Successful Single-Parent Family

PERSONAL

“I Chose To Do It Alone”

Racial and Ethnic Minority Families

The African-American Family
The Hispanic Family
The Asian-American Family
The Interracial Family

Families With Same-Sex Parents

What Do You Think?
Problems In Gay and Lesbian Families
Intimacy In the Gay and Lesbian Family
Long-Term Gay and Lesbian Relationships

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Diversity in Families

3. GENDER ROLES: FOUNDATION FOR INTIMACY

Learning Objectives

Men and Women: How Do They Differ?
Men and Women: Some Commonalities
Gender Differences

Sex, Gender, Gender Role, and Gender-Role Orientation

Gender Roles
Gender-Role Orientation

What Do You Think?

Gender Roles: Nature Or Nurture?
How Much Is Biological?
The Importance Of Nurture
Socialization and Gender-Role Orientation

COMPARISON

Inuit Youth Learn To Be Males and Females

Changing Gender Roles and Orientations

Changing Patterns
Lingering Traditionalism

Gender-Role Orientation: What Difference Does It Make?

Communication
Self-Concept
Mental Health

Gender-Role Orientation and Intimacy

PERSONAL

“We Worked It Out”

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Gender Roles: Foundation for Intimacy

4. SEXUALITY

Learning Objectives

The Meaning of Sex
Heterosexuality and Homosexuality
Sex As Physical: The Response Cycle
Sex As Social Behavior

Unwanted and Coerced Sex

Sex and Intimate Relationships

PERSONAL

Sex and the Search for Intimacy

Teenage Sex

Extent of Sex Among Teenagers
Unwanted Pregnancy and Early Childbearing

Contraception

Amount and Kinds of Contraceptive Use
Who Uses Contraceptives

Abortion

What Do You Think?

Premarital Sex

The Double Standard
Changing Attitudes
Changing Behavior
Sex In Marriage
Sexual Practices in Marriage
Sexual Satisfaction and Marital Satisfaction
Changes in Marital Sex Over the Lifespan

Extramarital Sex

Why Extramarital Sex?
Some Consequences of Extramarital Sex

Sexual Diseases and Dysfunctions

Sexual Diseases
Sexual Dysfunctions
Inhibited Sexual Desire
Safe Sex

COMPARISON

Unsafe Sex In Lesotho

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Sexuality


PART 2. SEEKING INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS

5. GETTING TO KNOW SOMEONE ELSE

Learning Objectives

We Are Social Creatures
Loneliness
Fulfillment Through Intimacy

PERSONAL

Searching for Intimacy

The Nature of Intimacy

The Meaning of Intimacy
Intimacy as an Exchange Relationship
Intimacy as Self-Sustaining

Meeting and Getting to Know Others

First Impressions

What Do You Think?

What Attracts?

COMPARISON

Mexican and United States Teens Portray Their Ideals
About the Opposite Sex

Developing a Relationship

First Stage: Initial Meeting and Awareness
Second Stage: The Selection Process
Third Stage: Developing Intimacy
Fourth Stage: Maintaining or Dissolving the Relationship

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Getting to Know Someone Else

6. GETTING INVOLVED

Learning Objectives

Hanging Out and Hooking Up

Dating

Finding People To Date
Selecting a Dating Partner
Functions of Dating
Patterns of Dating

COMPARISON

Commitment to Dating Partners in theU.S. and Taiwan
Dating Problems

Moving Beyond Dating

Moving Into a More Permanent Relationship
Engagement

Cohabitation

What Do You Think?
Who Cohabits?
Patterns of Cohabitation
Cohabitation Compared to Marriage
Cohabitation as a Preparation for Marriage

Breaking Up

Who Breaks Up?
Responding to Deterioration

PERSONAL

The Birth, Life, and Death of a Relationship

Staying Single

Why People Are Single
Intimacy and Life Satisfaction


Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Getting Involved

7. Falling In Love

Learning Objectives

The Meaning of Love

When You Fall In Love

The Process of Falling
How Can You Tell If It's Love?

PERSONAL

Falling in Love–Twice

Passionate Versus Companionate Love

The Emergence of Passionate Love
The Experience of Passionate Love
From Passionate Love To Companionate Love

What Do You Think?

Loving and Liking
Rubin's Love Scale
Love and Friendship

A Triangular Theory of Love

Styles of Loving
Six Types of Lovers
Implications of Differing Styles of Loving

Love Threatened--Jealousy

Who Is Most Jealous?

COMPARISON

Jealousy Among the Italians, Dutch, and New Guineans
Situations That Provoke Jealousy
Consequences of Jealousy

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Falling in Love

8. Selecting A Life Partner

Learning Objectives

Is There a Best Way To Select a Life Partner?
What We Expect In a Life Partner

COMPARISON

Looking for a Mate in India

Qualities Desired in a Life Partner
Exchange and Equity

Narrowing the Field: Assortative Mating

Life Partner Selection as a Filtering Process
Age
Ethnic Background
Race
Religion
Education
Personality
And So Forth
Why Assortative Mating?

Predictors of Marital Satisfaction

Timing

PERSONAL

Should I Marry My Baby’s Father?
Equity

What Do You Think?

Communication
PREPARE: A Multi-Factor Approach

A Final Caution

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Selecting a Life Partner


PART 3. THE INTIMATE COUPLE

9. GETTING MARRIED

Learning Objectives

What Are Your Chances of Getting Married?
Marital Status of the Population
Who Does, and Doesn't, Marry?

Why Do People Marry?

The Need for Intimacy
Social Expectations

What Do You Think?

Social Ideals and Personal Fulfillment
Desire for Children
Marriage as a Practical Solution

Types of Marriage

Classified by Lifestyles
Classified by Nature of the Relationships

COMPARISON

Types of Marriage in Togo

Expectations

Our Private Contracts
Role Expectations
Negotiation: Changing Personal Contracts
The Marriage Contract: Clarifying Expectations

Adjusting To Marriage

His Marriage and Her Marriage
Starting With Two Strikes
Establishing Equity and Consensus
Adjustment and In-Law Relationships

First Year Changes

PERSONAL

In-Laws: The Good and the Bad

Commitment
The Meaning of Commitment
The Role of Commitment
Building Commitment

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Getting Married

10. THE CHALLENGE OF COMMUNICATION

Learning Objectives

The Nature of Communication
Verbal Communication
Nonverbal Communication

Communication as an Interaction Process

A Discussion About Sex
Communication Static
Communicating Feelings

Listening

Styles of Poor Listening
Improving Listening Skills

Impediments To Communication

Destructive Messages

What Do You Think?

Gender Differences As An Impediment
Why Husbands and Wives Don't Talk To Each Other

Satisfying Communication

PERSONAL

All the Talk Was Useless

Communication, Marital Satisfaction, and Intimacy
Everyday Conversations
Self-Disclosure

COMPARISON

Couple Talk in Brisbane and Munich
Other Aspects of Communication

Improving Communication Skills

Rules
Practice

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

The Challenge of Communication

11. POWER AND CONFLICT IN MARRIAGE

Learning Objectives

Power In Marriage
The Meaning of Power
Why Is Power Important?
Sources of Power

COMPARISON

The Power of Egyptian Husbands and Wives

What Do You Think?

Marriage as a Power Struggle
Types of Power Interaction

Conflict In Marriage

The Positive Functions of Conflict
The Negative Consequences of Severe Conflict
What People Fight About
Sources of Tension
Styles of Conflict

Good Fighting

Maintain Your Perspective

PERSONAL

Learning How to Fight

Develop Tension Outlets

Avoid Festering Resentment
Be Sensitive To Timing
Communicate Without Ceasing
Be Flexible, Willing To Compromise
Use Conflict To Attack Problems, Not Your Spouse
Keep Loving While You Are Fighting

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Power and Conflict in Marriage

l2. Work And Home

Learning Objectives

His Work and Her Work

Changing Patterns of Working

Women In the Labor Force
Married Women and Employment
Types of Dual-Career Families

Why Women Work Outside the Home

Home Versus the Workplace

Challenges of Dual-Income Families

More Or Less Equal?
Who's Minding The House?

COMPARISONS

Household Tasks and Equity in China
Children and the Challenge of Child Care
The Costs of Both Parents Working

What Do You Think?

Time Management
Role Negotiation

Satisfactions of Dual-Income Families

Marital Satisfaction
Other Benefits

PERSONAL

Employed and Married, and Loving Both

Work and Well-Being

Life Satisfaction
Mental and Physical Health
Coping Strategies

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Work and Home


PART 4. INTIMACY IN FAMILIES

l3. BECOMING A PARENT

Learning Objectives

Changing Patterns of Child-Bearing
Birth Rates
Preferences For Size and Sex

To Bear Or Not To Bear

Why People Want To Have Children
The Child-Free Option

PERSONAL

To Be a Parent? The Agonies of the Decision

Involuntary Childlessness

Infertility
Coping With Infertility

Options For the Infertile

Artificial Insemination
In Vitro Fertilization
Surrogate Mothers
Adoption

What Do You Think?

Children and the Quality of Life
The Stresses of Raising Children
Children and Marital Satisfaction
The Satisfactions of Raising Children

Parenting: Her Experience and His Experience

Her Experience
His Experience

COMPARISONS

On the Playground in France, Germany, and Italy

Parenting and the Well-Being of Children

Styles of Parenting
Types of Discipline
Parental Behavior and Children’s Adjustment
Parental Behavior and Self-Esteem
A Final Note: Is Older Better In Parenting?

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Becoming a Parent

14. THE FAMILY LIFE CYCLE

Learning Objectives

The Family Life Cycle
The Meaning of the Family Life Cycle
What Changes Over the Family LIfe Cycle?
Social Change and the Family Life Cycle

The Newly Married: A Family Without Children

What Do You Think?

The Family With Young Children

The Family At Midlife: Adolescents and Aging Parents
The Needs of Adolescents
Parent-Child Problems
Emerging Adulthood
Caring For Aging Parents
The Couples' Midlife Concerns
Satisfaction at Midlife

The Launching and Empty Nest Stage

The Couple Together Again

PERSONAL

An Empty-Nest High

Grandparenthood

The Aging Family

Retirement
Marital Relations

COMPARISON

Caring for Elderly Family Members on Malo
Other Relationships
Death of a Spouse

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

The Family Life Cycle


PART 5. CHALLENGES TO INTIMACY

15. FAMILY CRISES

Learning Objectives

Sources of Family Crises
Stress and Crisis
Stressor Events

Abuse of Alcohol and Other Drugs In the Family

Extent of Drug Abuse
Drug Abuse and the Quality of Family Life
Family Problems and Drug Abuse

Violence In Families

The Extent of Violence
Child Abuse



Incest
Spouse Abuse

What Do You Think?

Parent Abuse

COMPARISON

Intimate Partner Abuse in Canada
Consequences of Abuse

Reacting To Crises

Coping Patterns
Ineffective Coping Patterns
The Foundation of Effective Coping
Tools For Effective Coping

PERSONAL

Things Were Terribly Still

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Family Crisis

16. SEPARATION AND DIVORCE

Learning Objectives

Divorce Trends
Divorce Rates
Changing Grounds For Divorce

What Do You Think?

The Process of Uncoupling
Toward Marital Dissolution
The Six Stations of Divorce

Causes and Correlates of Divorce

Sociodemographic Factors
Interpersonal Factors

COMPARISONS

Divorce, Japanese Style

Effects of Divorce on Spouses/Parents

Positive Outcomes
Health Problems
Financial Problems

PERSONAL

My Whole World Was Lost
Interaction Between Former Spouses

Effects of Divorce On Children

Short-Term Effects
Long-Term Effects
Gender Differences

Child Custody

Coping With the Disruption

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Separation and Divorce

17. REMARRIAGE AND STEPFAMILIES

Learning Objectives

Types and Number of Remarriages and Stepfamilies
Types of Remarried Couples
Demographics of Remarriage and Stepfamilies

Deja Vu: Dating and Mate Selection Revisited

Why Remarry?

Issues In Recoupling

The Myths of Remarriage
The Challenges of Remarriage

PERSONAL

“My Husband's First Wife Is Straining My Marriage”
The Quality of Remarried Life

COMPARISONS

Repartnering in Australia

Living In a Stepfamily

What Do You Think?

The Stepfamily Life Cycle

The Structure of the Stepfamily
Stepparents and Stepchildren
Family Functioning

Making It Work

Summary

Principles for Enhancing Intimacy

Key Terms

INTERNET CONNECTION

Remarriage and Stepfamilies

Glossary

References

Credits

Index
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