My Fine Feathered Friend

My Fine Feathered Friend

4.5 2
by William Grimes

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Boy Meets Bird.
Boy Gets Bird.
Boy Loses Bird
An Urban Folktale.

One day in the dead of winter, New York Times restaurant critic William Grimes looked out the window into his backyard in Queens and saw a chicken, jet black with a crimson comb. Wherever it had come from, it showed no sign of leaving, and it quickly

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Boy Meets Bird.
Boy Gets Bird.
Boy Loses Bird
An Urban Folktale.

One day in the dead of winter, New York Times restaurant critic William Grimes looked out the window into his backyard in Queens and saw a chicken, jet black with a crimson comb. Wherever it had come from, it showed no sign of leaving, and it quickly made a place for itself among the society of resident stray cats. Before long, the chicken became the Chicken, and it began to arouse not only Grimes's protective impulses but also his curiosity. He discovered that chickens were domesticated first as fighters, not food; that egg-laying is triggered by exposure to light; that chickens were a fashion statement in Victorian days. He began to probe the mysteries of gallinaceous behavior, learning to distinguish a dust bath from a death dance and how to cater to his guest's eclectic palate. And when the Chicken began to repay his hospitality with five or six custom-laid eggs per week, Grimes had an answer to the age-old conundrum of which came first: the Chicken.

And then one day, obeying some bird-brained logic of its own -- or perhaps the victim of fowl play -- the Chicken vanished, leaving Grimes eggless but with this funny, enlightening, and heartwarming tale to tell.

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Editorial Reviews
The Barnes & Noble Review
As restaurant reviewer for The New York Times, William Grimes was very familiar with chicken -- sautéed, fricasseed, baked, roasted, minced, deboned, stuffed, shredded, or jerked. None of these gustatory experiences, however, prepared him for the sight of the live chicken that arrived in his backyard one winter and proceeded to settle in.

"My policy towards animals is pure hypocrisy," writes Grimes. "Once I meet them, I don't want to eat them." And so, an interspecies relationship began. This story of a man and his chicken is pure charm, lighter than a feather, an urban folktale founded in reality.

The new arrival, jet black with a crimson comb, seemed happy with its newly found digs in the Grimeses' backyard in Astoria, Queens. It scratched its way up the ladder in the backyard society of stray cats, elbowing Cookie, Bruiser, Crusher, and Yowzer from their bowls of cat food. With the advent of spring, it even started laying eggs once a day.

Grimes and his wife, Nancy, resisted attempts to give the fowl a name, but it soon acquired a capital letter, becoming the Chicken. Gradually, a connection of sorts was established: Grimes put out food for the Chicken, and the Chicken came to eat it. You wouldn't confuse it with the kind of bonding that occurs between dogs and humans, or even cats and humans. But it was something.

Prompted by his new friend, Grimes starts pecking his way through chicken history. He seeks advice from urban and rural agrarians on chicken preferences in sleeping, eating, and scratching. He gets even more advice once he writes a column about the Chicken in the Times. A photographer with a giant telephoto lens arrives to play paparazzo.

Shortly thereafter, the chicken disappears -- the result of chick-anery, perhaps, or a bird's reluctance to become a star, or the onset of wanderlust. Heartsick, the Grimeses scan the skies for weeks, to no avail. At last report, they were still birdless in Queens. (Ginger Curwen)

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Farrar, Straus and Giroux
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One day in the dead of winter, I looked out my back window and saw a chicken. It was jet black with a crimson comb, and in classic barnyard fashion, it was scratching and pecking and clucking as it moved across the tiny rectangle of my lawn. It was, in every way, a normal chicken, except for one thing. It was in the middle of New York City.

I looked closer, blinked a few times, and shrugged off the apparition. Birds come and go in New York. Usually they're pigeons, not chickens, but like other birds, this one had wings and would probably use them. Or so I thought.

Night fell. Day broke. I looked out the back window and the chicken was still there, large as life. A little larger, actually. It looked content. It certainly showed no sign of wanting to move on. I sensed that this fly-by-night visitor was thinking about becoming a permanent resident. New York, the city of immigrants, was getting another one.

It was a fine-looking bird. Tired and poor, perhaps, but no wretched refuse. This chicken was huge, and it had obviously been eating well. Its black feathers shone, giving off a greenish purple iridescence in bright sunlight. Its beady brownish orange eyes had a healthy sparkle. They looked like the glass eyes on a stuffed toy animal. Its legs, thick and strong, supported it like two heavy-duty tripods. In Russian folklore, there's a witch, Baba Yaga, who lives deep in the forest. Her home is a hut that rests on chicken legs. I'd always found that description puzzling. Now I understood. Two chicken legs would be ideal for supporting a hut. These particular legs gave the chicken a lurching, confident gait. With its chest puffed out, it paced self-importantly, like a mid-level bureaucrat. As far as I could tell, it had nothing special to do, but it did nothing with a grand flourish. One moment it looked overweight, pompous, and slightly ridiculous. The next it seemed rather imposing, a dashing black figure on a mysterious mission.

It was the right bird in the wrong spot. The chicken may be a domestic creature, but it's not meant for the city, and that's exactly where this country cousin had come to roost. Astoria, my neighborhood, is just across the East River from Manhattan — only three or four subway stops from Bloomingdale's, in fact. It's a quiet, workaday sort of place, with three-story apartment buildings and small houses in two styles: square boxes covered in aluminum siding and brick "Tudor" houses with steeply pitched slate roofs. My own house is one of the square boxes, with gray siding and a narrow walkway on either side. With outspread arms, you can easily touch my house and the one next to it. There's very little about the house, or the area, that would entice a chicken. Even humans find it hard to get excited about Queens, New York's least charismatic borough. Except for Staten Island. Thank God for Staten Island.

Anyway, nothing much happens in Astoria. People go to work, then come home. They wash their cars, leave Christmas and Halloween decorations up for months on end, and spend far too much time looking for parking. Nancy, my wife, once dropped her wallet on the sidewalk. Someone returned it. When she looked inside, the money was still there. The only really shocking event that I can recall in my twenty years in Astoria is the day a deranged cabdriver walked into his bank, withdrew thirty thousand dollars in savings, and threw the bills up in the air on the sidewalk outside.

It's not quite fair to say that the neighborhood is a blank. Astoria has a history of sorts, starting with its name. Like most of Queens, it simply dozed for the two centuries after the Dutch sailed into New York Harbor. Then in 1839 a fur merchant named Stephen A. Halsey saw opportunity. Hoping to flatter John Jacob Astor, king of all fur traders, and entice him into a partnership, he asked the state legislature to change the area's name from Dutch Kills to Astoria. There's no evidence that Astor paid any attention, but wealthy New Yorkers noticed that bucolic Astoria, with its gently rolling hills, offered fine views of the East River and plenty of fresh air. They began building mansions near the water.

Look at the map, and you'll see that Queens is on Long Island. The opening of the Queensboro Bridge in 1909 and an elevated subway in 1917 touched off a half century land rush that turned that island's pristine woodlands, wetlands, and potato farms into a continuous, densely populated suburb of Manhattan. Astoria was the first stop along the way.

Copyright (c) 2002 William Grimes

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What People are saying about this

Peter Gethers
Who knew chickens could be so fascinating — and lovable — when they're not roasted, sautéed, or extra crispy? Well, thanks to William Grimes, we all know it now. My Fine Feathered Friend is a charming, funny, and delightful look at one man's relationship with an egg-laying guest.
— (Peter Gethers, author of The Cat Who'll Live Forever)
Elizabeth Marshall Thomas
A book of great charm that makes the hidden lives of chickens so interesting it may inspire readers to adopt a bird of their own — or at least to wake up to the wonders in their backyards, whatever lives there.
— (Elizabeth Marshall Thomas, author of The Hidden Life of Dogs)

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My Fine Feathered Friend 4.5 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 2 reviews.
Guest More than 1 year ago
The book is ALMOST as funny as the original story that appeared in the New York Times last year. The spontaneity of the situation seems to be lost through revisions, additions and edits, but it's just plain fun. Even if you're not an ornithologist, The Chicken will win your heart.
Guest More than 1 year ago
In working class neighborhood Astoria, Queens, a chicken comes out of nowhere to reside in the backyard of the home of New York Times food critic William Grimes and his wife. Somehow the fowl makes a nest amidst the other creatures of the asphalt jungle mainly cats. Even more surprising to Grimes is how much he wants to keep the chicken safe. Soon chicken becomes the Chicken. However, ultimately for no known reason the Chicken vanishes never to return leaving behind two sad humans who still miss their bird.

MY FINE FEATHERED FRIEND is a wonderfully humorous story of how an animal can capture the heart of a human. Mr. Grimes looks into the history of the chicken while relating anecdotal episodes about his particular Chicken. The true tale is amusing and pet lovers will fully understand the author¿s emotions while laughing at the antics of the Chicken. Mr. Grimes has not laid an egg with the engaging adventures of Chicken in the city that feels more like an amusing parable or fable.

Harriet Klausner