My Husband Betty: Love, Sex, and Life with a Crossdresser

My Husband Betty: Love, Sex, and Life with a Crossdresser

by Helen Boyd
     
 

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Author Helen Boyd is a happily married woman whose husband enjoys sharing her wardrobe - and she has written the first book on transgendered men to focus on their relationships. Traditionally known as cross-dressers, transvestites, or drag queens, men like Helen's husband are a diverse lot who don't always conform to stereotype. Helen addresses every imaginable

Overview

Author Helen Boyd is a happily married woman whose husband enjoys sharing her wardrobe - and she has written the first book on transgendered men to focus on their relationships. Traditionally known as cross-dressers, transvestites, or drag queens, men like Helen's husband are a diverse lot who don't always conform to stereotype. Helen addresses every imaginable question concerning the probable and improbable reasons for behavior that still baffle not only "mental health professionals" but the practitioners themselves; the taxonomy of the transgendered and the distinct but overlapping societies of each group; coming out; bisexuality, and homophobia.
The book features interviews with some very interesting people: a dominatrix and her crossdressing husband; a crossdressing Reiki master and his son; a woman who after dating one crossdresser wanted to date others and fell in love with a transsexual instead; and a woman whose husband promised her he was only a crossdresser who later realized that he was transsexual.
The stories and opinions chosen to represent the spectrum will surely titillate, shock, and disgust some readers; alternatively, Helen's narrative is a powerful lens with which to examine our own notions of gender and equality.

Editorial Reviews

Library Journal
This may be the first work written by the wife of a heterosexual cross-dresser. Drawing on her five-year marriage to "Betty"-as well as reports from other couples from the cross-dressing and transgendered community-Boyd (a pseudonym) discusses with humor and candor ways to come to terms with cross-dressing, focusing on issues of identity, trust, and sexuality. Critically, yet with sympathy, she explores misconceptions about cross-dressing ("a cross between a wish and a compulsion") and describes communities and support groups. In the world of cross-dressing, she reveals that there is no "one size fits all": some men keep their behavior a secret, others act on the desire to "out" in public, and still others transition to being transgendered. Unlike many wives of cross-dressers, Boyd learned of Betty's behavior during their early weeks of dating; she now moderates an online support group for wives and partners of cross-dressers. Though primarily addressed to the wives and partners of cross-dressers (and cross-dressers themselves), this will undoubtedly have a wider appeal to those curious about this subculture. Recommended for public and academic libraries.-Lucille M. Boone, San Jose P.L., CA Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information.
Kirkus Reviews
The forthright wife of a transvestite offers a revealing look inside the little-known world of transgendered men and their female partners. Boyd (a pseudonym), founder of an online support group for cross-dressers and their partners, pulls no punches here in telling her primary audience, women with cross-dressing boyfriends or husbands, what she has learned from both personal experience and five years of research. Among the questions she tackles are why some men cross-dress and why women choose to stay with them. Profiling six couples from her online support group to demonstrate that there are various ways of dealing with cross-dressing, Boyd opens with a brief introduction to each couple (and photos of some), then lets them describe themselves and their relationship in their own words. Elsewhere, she discusses the pros and cons of coming out, the most common sexual problems of cross-dressers, and the differences and similarities among cross-dressers, transsexuals, and homosexuals. She argues that cross-dressers, some of whom are quite adamant about being heterosexual and resist any linkage with other transgendered groups, could learn a lot from the gay community about facing harassment, discrimination in employment, and rejection from friends and family. The book has a helter-skelter feel: Boyd mixes big topics like history, politics, and psychology with up-close and personal material about cross-dressers she has come to know and like, her personal experiences living with a cross-dresser, her clashes with those whose views she does not share. Whatever its organizational faults, however they're balanced by the author's honest voicing of her opinions, misgivings, and fears.Back-of-the-book material includes a glossary of expressions and abbreviations used in the transgendered community, with supplemental terms that should have been folded into the main entry; an alphabetical list by first name of all the people mentioned in the text, which serves no readily discernible purpose; a chatty annotated bibliography; and a list of resources for cross-dressers and their significant others. Makes abundantly clear the complexities of life with a cross-dresser.

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9781560255154
Publisher:
Avalon Publishing Group
Publication date:
10/10/2003
Pages:
304
Sales rank:
735,363
Product dimensions:
6.01(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.85(d)

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