Why, you know, it was only last summer that I was wearily trudging
through Melbourne streets in search of lodgings, and will you credit
it that I have to-day arrived at the dignity of keeping lodgers
myself! Instead of speaking humbly to ...
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My Lodger

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Why, you know, it was only last summer that I was wearily trudging
through Melbourne streets in search of lodgings, and will you credit
it that I have to-day arrived at the dignity of keeping lodgers
myself! Instead of speaking humbly to crusty old women who scan me
from head to foot inspectively, and watch any loose articles, such as
a huckaback towel, that may be lying about when I request to see the
"apartment" to let, I have the immense satisfaction of being crusty,
and of snapping and turning up my nose at non-eligible inquirers for
rooms myself.

Now, I don't care how much inclined you may be to disagreeable fault-
finding, you must acknowledge that I have wonderfully improved my
condition within the past few months; not that I expect much sympathy
from you in any case, oh, no! (although, if you made anything by it, I
have no doubt any quantity of that commodity would be humbly at my
service), but you are so much in the habit of considering yourself and
your judgments as infallible, and of talking of yourself as a
reasonable and reasoning creature (fond public!) that you would not
venture upon jeopardising your character by denying a fact so obvious.

And although I calculate upon a hearing of my little insignificant
interests from you in a general way, in a particular one how idle it
would be to attempt interesting you! You walk on Turkey carpets, or at
the least Brussels, you do; and you loll upon, oh, so soft and
delicious sofas, and in the downiest of easy-chairs; and what do you
care about the cost of dingy-looking drugget, or the price of sea-weed
mattresses! Faugh! the very idea of the thing makes you ill, doesn't
it? but that doesn't trouble me in the least, you know, for it is
quite as much pleasure to me to talk of my own petty affairs as it is
to you to discuss the most important arrangements connected with your
most magnificent menage.

If one has the bump of constructiveness at all well developed, there
is nothing more pleasurably exciting than furnishing a house upon
nothing. Until you commence to do so with not more than four or five
pounds in your purse, and begin to contrive tables and seats out of
empty cases, and to convert trunks and boxes into pretty-looking
ottomans, you don't know what fun there is in the world. Until you
have to scrape pennies together in a way that the careful can only
understand, and lay them together to make shillings for the
acquisition of some necessary trifle, you have little idea of the
comfort to be derived from the most ordinary of necessities; and I
have not the least doubt that I have more real pleasure in
contemplating at this moment a very pretty rug, bought for the sum of
two shillings and sixpence, than you enjoy in looking at the tout
ensemble of your very magnificent drawing-room, the furnishing of
which, I myself am aware, cost you a few cool hundreds.
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Product Details

  • BN ID: 2940013703193
  • Publisher: WDS Publishing
  • Publication date: 1/18/2012
  • Sold by: Barnes & Noble
  • Format: eBook
  • File size: 23 KB

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