My Year in Smut: The Internet Escapades Inside Danni's Hard Drive

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It is also very beneficial if you have a human quotient; an identifiable personality tied to your site. One thing that I learned from Danni Ashe is that it is also extremely helpful, especially if you’re a woman like me who’s writing thoughtful articles about relationships and sex, politics and feminism, to have interesting, even provocative pictures of yourself spread across your Web pages. They don’t have to be nudes, of course, but great looking shots of a good-looking woman make surfers more likely to access, and more importantly, read your articles. The Internet is not unlike the print world in this regard. It is also my feeling that women appreciate seeing shots of attractive men online as well.

The minute I began my job at DHD I started getting emails from men asking me, “When are we going to see more of Taylor?” My section on the site, The Editor’s Desk, showed only a head shot. I would respond to emails on a daily basis stating that I was strictly “all talk” and that a layout was not in the cards for me, also thanking them for their curiosity and compliments. I got emails from young guys, single guys, married men to older gentlemen and guys in the armed services. There was absolutely no specific criteria for the men with whom I corresponded.

Flirting and corresponding online with all the guys was quite a thrill for me. I’m as much a voyeur as most men, but having major responsibility for an adult smut site was something I’d never experienced. My presence brought out some interesting comments, questions and stories from the guys. A recurring question was, “Do women really enjoy sex as much as men?” I would continually reply that they absolutely do, depending on the woman involved. I hadn’t known what to expect from the guys, but they were great and almost always respectful. They were also very welcoming, for the most part, and incredibly open about their feelings regarding sex and women.

One of the very first emails I received had to do with a column I’d written about latex condoms. The guy writing felt adamantly that condoms change a man’s ability to feel pleasure and make it impossible to fully enjoy sex. Some men have difficulty staying erect wearing a condom. This guy’s solution was to let time pass between relationships, then once he’d found a new girlfriend, they’d agree to get AIDS tests before venturing forward. He eventually opted for a vasectomy and monogamy so he could enjoy the freedom of unlimited intimacy, without the latex baggage, as he referred to it. Many men lamented their displeasure about condoms. Unfortunately, in the multiple partner, serial monogamy reality we all live in we haven’t many other choices, unless we decide to really commit to one another, but even then our modern longevity becomes a formidable challenge to life-long partnering.