Nasty People: How to Stop Being Hurt by Them Without Becoming One of Them

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Overview

Each of us knows someone who makes us feel as small as the period at the end of this sentence. When that happens, how many times have you just walked away angry or hurt, only later thinking of what you should have said or done? Maybe you work with such a person. Or live with him? Or confront her every day in the mirror.

Nasty People raise themselves up by putting others down. They are "invalidators," but you can disarm their weapons, using everything from humor to confrontation....

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Overview

Each of us knows someone who makes us feel as small as the period at the end of this sentence. When that happens, how many times have you just walked away angry or hurt, only later thinking of what you should have said or done? Maybe you work with such a person. Or live with him? Or confront her every day in the mirror.

Nasty People raise themselves up by putting others down. They are "invalidators," but you can disarm their weapons, using everything from humor to confrontation. With Nasty People, you'll never again be defenseless against office gossips, false friends, know-it-all relatives, or the just plain SOBs. The book includes cogent insights into

  • How nasty people think
  • How to deal with a nasty boss or nasty spouse
  • Who makes a typical "victim" What you can do if you think you're the nasty person
  • How to break the cycle of nastiness
We all know it's impossible for any one person to rid the world of nastiness, but you can stop wringing your hands, tearing your hair, and biting your tongue. Nasty People will help you put an end to being controlled by nasty people so that you can start feeling good again.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780760727669
  • Publisher: Sterling Publishing
  • Publication date: 3/15/2002
  • Pages: 87
  • Product dimensions: 5.70 (w) x 8.24 (h) x 0.49 (d)

Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 32 )
Rating Distribution

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(18)

4 Star

(6)

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(3)

2 Star

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 32 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 8, 2008

    To read this book is an 'Act of liberation'

    I have received this book today at 11 am and actually had a lots of plans for today 'saturday'. Well, I dropped everything and couldn't stop reading until I was through by about 4 pm. Didn't even take a shower..... So far the best day in the last five years! The gained knowledge will certainly help me to deal with one of my colleagues who, as it appears to me, is the mother of all 'invalidators' Thanks Jay Carter

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 14, 2005

    Wow!

    This is simply one of the best books I have ever read in my life. It is short and to the point and if you apply what he says it will save you a lot of heartache. I am now reading this book for the second time, my God it is so right on. It is practical and can be easily understood. Thank God for Jay Carter!

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 2, 2003

    This book is dead on.

    This book is a must read. I have had a problem with a nasty person who drove me to become a nasty person and now I know why. I have shared this book with many friends and they plan on getting their own copy. I plan on sharing it with the nasty person and maybe they will have the same eye opening experience that I have had.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted May 24, 2013

    Awesome - a must read!

    I always said there must be an answer to why people can be just plain awful, and now it all makes sense. This book has the answers and it is a must read, must have, and keep around. Love it!

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 30, 2012

    This book changed my life.

    This book changed my life.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 25, 2012

    This book is great

    I love this book

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 20, 2010

    Nasty People

    I did not finish this book...as I worked my way through the book I realized I was focused on the wrong perspective....the only way to change the way people react to me is to change myself first...then change my outlook on the people in my life.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 30, 2013

    Good reading, very informative!

    This book is very informative, helps us to see what makes us ugly and mean!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 9, 2013

    This book saved my emotional life & taught me to see my own

    This book saved my emotional life & taught me to see my own "red flags" and not ignore them. I have shared over 25 copies with friends and family over the years. simple, easy to understand and easier to digest and implement this book changes ones outlook.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 5, 2012

    Great Book

    Helpful for understanding yourself and others. Thanks!!

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  • Posted June 21, 2010

    more from this reviewer

    Very Informative

    I wanted to read this book to know why was that so many people are just nasty. I personally liked it, there were lots of information that just opened my eyes. I'm glad i read it and i would recommend it to anyone that has been put down or that you think you've put down people. It'll change the way you look at people, and how to handle them when come across them.

    change for 2012.

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  • Posted March 4, 2009

    Nasty People

    I found this book to be a great pick-me-up. The realization that other people, intentionally or unintentionally, as out to make you feel bad is enlightening! Plus, the coping strategies are very helpful. I highly recommend the book to everyone.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted April 6, 2004

    I lived it

    I have been on the receiving end of a nasty person. This book is a guide on how you can see the signs and take action before it is too late. Quick and easy read!

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted September 17, 2003

    A MUST-HAVE book for everyone

    As someone who just resigned from a job I liked and needed because of an invalidating boss, I can tell you this book hits the nail on the head. The examples given are exactly what I experienced-almost word for word. How invalidation makes you feel and what can be done about invalidation are also right on. Mr. Carter provides the big picture of how and why people behave badly-particularly the more subtle and undermining things that victims may not recognize. You get the whole forest and not just a tree or two. The book is empowering to the invalidator as well as the invalidated. I am so grateful Jay Carter wrote it and wish I had this information decades ago. It would have saved me so much pain, bewilderment, time, and money. I intend to buy more copies for gifts.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted April 20, 2003

    thank god for this book

    I enjoyed this book very much. I learned how to deal with my monster in-law, who is a nasty person but who is a nice person deep down. I learned how to deal with her without hurting her feelings or becoming a nasty person myself.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 27, 2002

    I'm not a nasty person

    My sister loved this book because one of her co-workers is mean to her. Of course my sister now knows that if you use this book to label someone else, the book is for you. I read it thinking that I was guilty of being mean to others ... only to find out that if you have to be invalidated a lot to think this way. A great book.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 3, 2002

    A book that gets you to put your feet in other peoples shoes

    I liked this book. Lately I have been feeling very uneasy with people, and now that I have read this book I am ready to live a happy life and stop keeping stress (stress caused by others or stress that was caused by being mean and my conscience set in!) bottled-up or exploding on innocent people!

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted August 10, 2001

    Simple little book tells why we hurt eachother

    This book basically states that people put others down to make themselves feel better. It gives a few ideas on how to interpret and combat nasty people, and how not to become one of them

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 1, 2001

    Best Self Help book for Verbally Abused

    This book has been a lifesend for me. There are principals in it that I have read about from other self-help books and been counselled about for years, but couldn't accept them until I heard them in the manner Jay Carter presents them. Now I understand why Mr. Carter's students pleaded with him to write this book. It is the absolute best for those who are verbally abused, men or woman. I have just spent the last 8 years in a devastating marriage, seen MANY counsellors, and been counselled by all my friends and family. Nothing worked, nothing was able to help me understand what I'd just been through, or what to do about it. I really needed this book, because I was becoming just like my abuser. Eleanor Roosevelt must have been an amazing woman, as Jay quotes her. Finally, at this price, you can't pass up this book. It will help you spot, and learn how to avoid abusers. And most important of all, help you to not become one too. Thankyou Mr Carter

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 18, 2000

    Reading the book was a healing experience

    We know what to do if someone swings a fist at us. There are laws and a common language for dealing with physical violence. But when people abuse us psychologically, we often have a hard time naming the experience and why it hurts so much. I chanced upon this book at a vulnerable time when a very important person in my life had launched upon a campaign to convince me that I was worse than useless. The book helped me to understand what was happening to me and to be confident that my feelings of hurt were real and not my own imagination. Though not from an explicitly Christian point of view, the viewpoint is very compatible with Christianity.

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