Never As Good As the First Time

by Mari Walker

Overview

For years Samai Collins has been a faithful Christian, devoted wife and loving mother. But suddenly she finds herself in the middle of a nasty divorce from her minister husband and struggling to find a job, with almost no work skills, in order to support her three children. As Samai tries to get back on her feet, loneliness and the deep longing for a man's touch cause her to stumble in her spiritual beliefs.

Then an old high school crush reappears and Samai's life takes a wild new turn. She is seduced completely by Zane Blackmon's passion and zest for life and soon finds herself being led down a dark path that she never knew existed. An underworld of drugs threatens her life and the lives of her three children. But is love...and just a little bit of faith enough to save them all?

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780312375423
Publisher:	St. Martin's Publishing Group
Publication date:	04/01/2008
Edition description:	First Edition
Pages:	304
Product dimensions:	5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.68(d)

About the Author

Mari Walker is the author of Never As Good As the First Time and Not Quite What It Seems. She spends her spare time freelance writing, editing, and advising aspiring writers on creative writing techniques. Mari resides in Ohio where she is currently working on her next novel.

Read an Excerpt

Never As Good As The First Time
In the beginning, Cain slew his brother Abel and destroyed his ability to think and reason forever preventing him from being all that he was meant to be.

Many centuries later, coCaine slew the brothers' Ability and destroyed their thinking and reasoning forever preventing them from being all they were meant to be...
Part I: Sinking Sand

Prologue

The room was dark and I was on my hands and knees, naked, digging at the floorboards with my bare hands. The lone thought in my mind was finding a rock that maybe someone had hidden in the little crevice where the floorboard and the floor met. I couldn't get it out of my head that there could be a little piece of crack hidden there. I knew that it had once been a crack house before I had moved in and there had to have been a lot of ballers and shot callers in and out of here night and day for years. They could have hidden some. Some long-neglected corner of my mind knew that I was being ridiculous and that I wouldn't find anything. A long- forgotten, far away voice that sounded like mine was telling me to stop, to get up off my hands and knees, but that driving, all- consuming need to have another blast, to have "Scotty beam me up" just one more time was keeping me captive, naked on my knees.

I raked my hand across the crevice one last time and felt something sharp slice across my fingers. I jerked my hand away and peered at it in the darkness, trying to assess the damage. The pain was immediate and intense; I could feel more than see the blood starting to trickle down my fingers from the open gash across the tips. I had been right about one thing, this had once been a hidingplace for crack. I had just found the still sharp razor blades embedded in the crevices that had once protected it.

I sat there on the floor for a long time, still naked and bleeding, not really caring if the bleeding stopped or not. In fact an idea was forming in my head that bleeding to death wouldn't be such a bad idea. I could get a razor blade from the medicine cabinet in the bathroom and open another gash on my wrists and let the blood from my fingertips mingle with the blood from my wrists and together they might drown the life out of me. But that nagging little voice would not be stilled. That voice of reason that had once been mine. And for about the 100th time it was asking me what was I doing here? What in Hell had brought me to this? I started to cry. Dear Jesus where are you? Help me Oh God, please help me out of this pit I've dug for myself!

But I was down so deep, I wasn't sure that even Jesus could reach me.

Reading Group Guide

For years Samai Collins has been a faithful Christian, devoted wife and loving mother. But suddenly she finds herself in the middle of a nasty divorce from her minister husband and struggling to find a job, with almost no work skills, in order to support her three children. As Samai tries to get back on her feet, loneliness and the deep longing for a man's touch cause her to stumble in her spiritual beliefs.

Then an old high school crush reappears and Samai's life takes a wild new turn. She is seduced completely by Zane Blackmon's passion and zest for life and soon finds herself being led down a dark path that she never knew existed. An underworld of drugs threatens her life and the lives of her three children. But is love...and just a little bit of faith enough to save them all?

1. Zane and Samai are total opposites when they reunite at Samai's job. Samai is quiet and reserved and Zane is outspoken, rough around the edges, and at times downright vulgar. Why do you think the attraction between the two of them was so immediate and intense?
2. When Samai went to Zane's house party, why wasn't she turned off when Zane informed her that some of his guests would be doing drugs? What kept Samai at the party after she saw a different side of Zane?
3. The sex between Zane and Samai was explosive and mind blowing. If someone could satisfy you that way, would you lose yourself in him? Why or why not?
4. Once Samai realized that she was addicted to crack, why wasn't the love for her children enough to make her seek help right away?
5. Why do you think Samai's daughter Jadyn was so anxious to move in with her aunt? How did Samai's addiction affect her and her ability to care for her children.
6. What kind of man did Zane reveal himself to be? What do you think made him behave the way he did?
7. Do you think that Zane ever loved Samai? Did Samai love Zane?
8. Do you think that turning to God is the only way to truly cure addiction?
9. Why did Quin react the way he did when he found out that Zane had stolen from him? Why was Quin also angry with Samai and Gloria Winston?
10. When Samai risked her life to save her daughter, do you feel she was redeemed from her past mistakes?
11. Which characters, if any, would you like to read about in another story? Why or why not?

Editorial Reviews

Mari Walker's fresh new voice brings an era to life with a style as enthralling as it is entertaining.” —Solomon Jones, Essence bestselling author of C.R.E.A.M.

“Never As Good As The First Time is a fascinating novel...Readers will no doubt have a hard time putting this intriguing book down.” —Books2Mention Magazine

From the Publisher