Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Compassion

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Overview

Nonviolent Communication is a simple process that facilitates the flow of communication necessary to exchange information and resolve differences compassionately. It is based on identifying universaly shared standards and needs. NVC can be practically applied in educational institutions, business and industry, social service agencies and politically charged situations, as well as family and personal relationships.

Nonviolent Communication encourages people to use language that ...

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Overview

Nonviolent Communication is a simple process that facilitates the flow of communication necessary to exchange information and resolve differences compassionately. It is based on identifying universaly shared standards and needs. NVC can be practically applied in educational institutions, business and industry, social service agencies and politically charged situations, as well as family and personal relationships.

Nonviolent Communication encourages people to use language that increases goodwill. It teaches people how to avoid language that creates resentment or lowers self esteem. It emphasizes compassion as the motivation for actions, rather than fear, guilt, shame or blame. It also emphasizes personal responsibility for our choices. Nonviolent Communication can be used effectively even without the other person's or group's knowledge of the process.

Marshall Rosenberg has rediscovered the lost language of humankind, the language of a people who care about one another and long to live in harmony. He guides us in reframing the way we express ourselves and listen to others by focusing our consciousness on four areas: what we are observing, feeling, and needing and what we are requesting to enrich our lives.

The skills he teaches foster deep listening, respect, and empathy and engenders a mutual desire to give from the heart.

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Editorial Reviews

D. Killian
Rosenberg starts with the question: What happens to disconnect us from our compassion, leading us to behave violently and exploitively? Rosenberg makes some challenging points: that compliments and apologies operate in a system of oppression; that rewards are as harmful as punishment, that killing is the easy way out. His distinction between punitive and protective force -- and how to discern when force is necessary -- should be required reading for anyone making foreign policy or policing, our streets. Demanding the ultimate form of responsibility -- and vulnerability -- it's no wonder that it has received little media and mass attention. Well-written and laid out, this book is accessible and easy to read.
—On The Front Line, Cleveland Free Times
Kate Lin
I Highly recommend Nonviolent Communication to anyone interested in resolving conflicts, creating more intimate relationships, or exploring the connection between language and violence.
The New Times
Linda C. Stoehr
When you think about the growth in today's dysfunctional families and the increase of violence in our schools, Rosenberg's communication techniques are a godsend. Throughout the book are stories and dialogue exercises, to get the reader to apply what has been read. The author also gives summaries at the end of each chapter to reinforce his message. Rosenberg's four-step model is an easy to follow technique that fosters healthy dialogue.
Los Colinas Business News
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781892005021
  • Publisher: Puddledancer Press
  • Publication date: 1/1/1999
  • Edition description: Older Edition
  • Pages: 224
  • Product dimensions: 6.05 (w) x 8.92 (h) x 0.57 (d)

Read an Excerpt

"Murderer!", "Assassin", "Child-killer!", "Murderer!"

I was presenting Nonviolent Communication in a mosque at a refugee camp in Bethlehem to about 170 Palestinians when a man leapt to his feet and hollered at the top of his lungs, "Murderer!" Immediately a dozen other voices joined him: "Assassin!" "Child-killer!" "Murderer!"

I knew the refugees harbored anger toward the U.S. for supplying weapons to Israel.

I addressed the man who had called me a murderer:

I: Are you angry because you would like my government to use its resources differently? (I didn't know whether my guess was correct, but what is critical is my sincere effort to connect with his feeling and need.)

He: Damn right I'm angry! You think we need tear gas? We need sewers, not your tear gas! We need housing! We need to have our own country!

Our dialogue continued for nearly twenty minutes and I listened for the feeling and need behind each statement. I didn't agree or disagree. I received his words, as gifts from a fellow human willing to share his soul with me.

Once he felt understood, he was able to hear my purpose for being at the camp. An hour later, the same man who had called me a murderer invited me home for a Ramadan dinner.

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Table of Contents

Chapter 1 Giving From the Heart: The Heart of Nonviolent Communication
Chapter 2 Communication That Blocks Compassion
Chapter 3 Observing Without Evaluating
Chapter 4 Identifying and Expressing Feelings
Chapter 5 Taking Responsibility for Our Feelings
Chapter 6 Requesting That Which Would Enrich Life
Chapter 7 Receiving Empathically
Chapter 8 The Power of Empathy
Chapter 9 Expressing Anger Fully
Chapter 10 The Protective Use of Force
Chapter 11 Liberating Ourselves and Counseling Others
Chapter 12 Expressing Appreciation in Nonviolent Communication
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Customer Reviews

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Sort by: Showing all of 2 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 19, 2001

    A Model for 'Doing' Love

    Since first discovering Nonviolent Communication several months ago through reading this book, NVC has catalyzed a process of clarification/healing/empowerment in me that I could never have imagined. This process has impacted every area of my life and continues to unfold. I have come to deeply value what NVC teaches. For me, it unifies the spiritual truths I've found in all the world's religions. Especially precious to me is the fact that it facilitates and strengthens mutually nourishing connections to others. I love it that it's taught as a skill, one human being to fully empowered fellow human beings, and that its truths are experientially testable. In my view, its challenge to imagine 'life-serving systems' (a phrase which comes from the mission statement of the Center for Nonviolent Communication) couldn't be more timely or more truly life-serving in today's world. I'm remembering Marshall Rosenberg saying in a workshop something to the effect that all the great religions have 'love' at their heart, and 'I'm just trying to figure out how to do that.' I stand in awe of the model this book teaches as a means of learning how to 'do' love and in awe of its elegant simplicity.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 22, 2009

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