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There’s no denying that a woman’s relationship with her father is one of the most important in her life. And there’s also no getting around how the quality of that relationship—good, bad, or otherwise—profoundly affects daughters in a multitude of ways.
In Our Fathers, Ourselves, research psychologist, author and scholar Dr. Peggy Drexler examines the ways in which the father-daughter bond impacts women and offers helpful advice for creating a better, stronger, more rewarding relationship. Through her extensive research and interviews with women, Dr. Drexler paints an intimate, timely portrait of the modern father-daughter relationship.
Women today are increasingly looking to their dads for a less-than-traditional bond, but one that still stands the test of time and provides support, respect, and guidance for the lives they lead today. Our Fathers, Ourselves is essential reading for any woman who has ever wondered how she could forge a closer connection with and gain a deeper understanding of her father.
Drexler (Psychology/Cornell Univ.; Raising Boys Without Men, 2005) sheds new light on the relationship between fathers and daughters.
The word fathermeans different things to different people, but for the author, who lost hers at an early age, it means mystery. She always wondered what she missed growing up without one. Through research, surveys and conversations with other women, the author weaves an intriguing analysis of the often complex father-daughter relationship. The author's first-person style is accessible and friendly, and she refrains from insulting the intelligence of the reader. Broken into three parts, the book kicks off with an overview of the roles fathers play in parenting and problems that can arise, with examples of fathers who get too close and fathers who do not put effort into getting close enough. The second section presents case studies of six women who have had positive relationships with their fathers—e.g., one father taught his daughter everything he would have taught a son. Though not surprising, the conclusions in the final section are significant. Every woman in the study realized the importance of the father figure in her life, even if the relationship was not entirely positive. Drexler includes a questionnaire that gently guides readers through an assessment of how well she knows her father, and provides tips for ways to improve father-daughter relations. Those tips, however, aren't simple or trite; her questions are thoughtful prompts for deeper analysis.
A helpful guide to father-daughter relationships, in which the author indicates that a woman must come to terms with her father in order to empower herself.
Introduction: Why I Wrote This Book VII
Part I Fathers and Daughters: Searching for Meaning
1 Fathers and Daughters: What's Changed, and What Hasn't 3
2 Father Knows Best, Least, and Everything In Between: Themes and Variations 43
Part II Daughters and Fathers: When Something Goes Right
3 Fathers Don't Have to Be Perfect to Be Good Dads 101
4 A Father Who Encouraged His Daughter to Take Risks and Think for Herself
5 A Father Who Answered His Daughter's Endless Questions 123
6 A Father Who Bestowed a Mantle of Power Upon His Daughter 134
7 A Father Who Always Knew What His Daughter Was Feeling 148
8 A Father Who Inspired His Daughter to Persevere and Succeed 163
9 A Father Who Taught His Daughter Everything He Would Have Taught a Son 181
Part III You and Your Father: When You Want to Make Things Better
10 Who Is This Man? If You Think You Know Your Dad, Think Harder 195
Questionnaire: How Well Do You Really Know Your Dad? 199
Afterword 233
Appendix: My Process of Discovery 238
Notes 243
Acknowledgments 247
Index 248
Anonymous
Posted February 27, 2012
No text was provided for this review.
Overview
There’s no denying that a woman’s relationship with her father is one of the most important in her life. And there’s also no getting around how the quality of that relationship—good, bad, or otherwise—profoundly affects daughters in a multitude of ways.
In Our Fathers, Ourselves, research psychologist, author and scholar Dr. Peggy Drexler examines the ways in which the father-daughter bond impacts women and offers helpful advice for creating a better, stronger, more rewarding ...