Panic and Joy: My Solo Path to Motherhood

by Emma Brockes

Overview

An explosive and hilarious memoir about the exceptional and life-changing decision to conceive a child on one's own via assisted reproduction
 
When British journalist, memoirist, and New York-transplant Emma Brockes decides to become pregnant, she quickly realizes that, being single, thirty-seven, and in the early stages of a same-sex relationship, she's going to have to be untraditional about it. From the moment she decides to stop "futzing" around, have her eggs counted, and "get cracking"; through multiple rounds of IUI; to the births of her twins, which her girlfriend gamely documents with her iPhone and selfie stick, Brockes brings the reader every step of the way--all the while exploring the cultural circumstances and choices that have brought her to this point. With mordant wit and remarkable candor, Brockes shares the frustrations, embarrassments, surprises, and, finally, joys of her momentous and excellent choice.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780525507048
Publisher:	Penguin Publishing Group
Publication date:	06/25/2019
Sold by:	Penguin Group
Format:	eBook
Pages:	304
File size:	1 MB

About the Author

Emma Brockes is the author of She Left Me the Gun: My Mother's Life Before Me. She writes for The Guardian's Weekend magazine and has contributed to The New York Times, The New Yorker, The Economist and Vogue. She is the winner of two British Press Awards—Young Journalist of the Year and Feature Writer of the Year—and while at Oxford won the Philip Geddes Memorial Prize for Journalism. She lives in New York.

Table of Contents

Prologue 1

Chapter 1 "Are You Going to Do It, Then?" 9

Chapter 2 Origin Story 27

Chapter 3 The Selfish Gene 47

Chapter 4 Tubes 67

Chapter 5 Sperm 93

Chapter 6 January 2014 107

Chapter 7 Drugs 121

Chapter 8 Waiting 141

Chapter 9 Falling 155

Chapter 10 Rising 179

Chapter 11 England 211

Chapter 12 New Year's Eve 227

Chapter 13 Neonatal 255

Epilogue 271

Acknowledgments 289

Editorial Reviews

…An Excellent Choice contains accounts of fertility clinics and a scene of dwindling hope in a public toilet, but there is nothing grim about it. Nor is a desire to get pregnant a prerequisite for reading it. Brockes…[is] smart and tartly charming…

The New York Times Book Review - Mary Pols

[A] splendid and fascinating book. [Brockes’s] memoir is subtitled ‘Panic and Joy on My Solo Path to Motherhood,’ but I saw no time when Brockes — supremely confident, sensible and twice as smart as anyone else in the room — panicked. She is cool, methodical and, at times, insanely funny, with a great eye for the ironies and amusements of life…There is no doubt that her decision — at least for us readers — was an excellent one indeed.” —Minneapolis Star Tribune

“The book speaks to a growing contingent of would-be parents who reach their 30s and 40s and find they have the means and motivation to have kids outside of a conventional domestic partnership, embracing their chosen single parenthood as a form of empowerment. It seems as if almost everyone bearing a child is writing a book about it, but Brockes is too original a personality to fall in quietly with the rest. A disarming and casually hilarious take on the opposite of co-parenting.” —Kirkus

“Brockes’ second memoir will have readers caught up in the excitement and anxiety of pregnancy along with her. Her humor and empathy shine through, even during her most challenging moments. Whether parents, aspiring parents, or happily child-free, readers will enjoy Brockes’ intimate story of how she became a mother.” —Booklist  

“[A] thoughtful memoir…Brockes takes readers on a fascinating and sometimes frustrating journey through fertility treatments, dashed hopes and delays, often accenting her tale with clever comparisons of the American and the British health care systems…An uplifting, well-told story, in which Brockes walks the fine line between surrendering to chance (i.e., not one but two babies) and taking charge to make tough but excellent choices.”  —Publishers Weekly

“I don't know whether to love Emma Brockes more as a writer or a human being. Why can't we all face life with her courage, grace, and shockingly good sense of humor?”
—Lauren Collins, author of When in French  
 
“Emma Brockes is a spiky, smart and ferocious writer. Her quest to become a mother is alternately harrowing and hilarious.”
—Pamela Druckerman, author of Bringing Up Bébé and There Are No Grown-ups
 
“Witty, irreverent, and wickedly perceptive, An Excellent Choice illuminates not one, but a whole host of still quasi-taboo topics from sperm donors to assisted reproduction. Emma Brockes is a beautiful writer, a wonderful story-teller, and a keen observer of human nature.”
—Amy Chua, author of Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother and Political Tribes

From the Publisher

2018-04-16
A fertility memoir with a whiff of Tristram Shandy.British journalist Brockes (She Left Me the Gun: My Mother's Life Before Me, 2013, etc.) recounts the process by which she and "L" decided to bear children as single, working mothers in a nontraditional but loving relationship. The author spent her 20s in the grip of an all-consuming dream job: writing for the Guardian. The sudden breakup of a three-way work marriage (one of her best friends fell pregnant) propelled her all the way to New York and onto the path toward having not just one baby, but twins, all by herself. Her eccentric narrative hazes over the challenges of same-sex parenting to focus on the fertility industry and the alternative structure that she and L created to make up for their hopeless incompatibility as live-in partners. They found matching apartments on different floors of the same Upper West Side high rise, which enabled them to bring the kids together regularly, but each woman parented her own children to suit herself. Brockes plays up the contrast in fertility treatment styles between England and the U.S., but while she extols the stolidity and sensibility of her national health care birthright, she can't help but glory in the comparatively free-wheeling American market for intrauterine insemination and in vitro fertilization as one more indication that her adopted country is the "place where the future happens first." Her quirky, neurotic intensity pairs well with the brisk pace she has crafted after so many years writing to deadlines, and she holds little back. The book speaks to a growing contingent of would-be parents who reach their 30s and 40s and find they have the means and motivation to have kids outside of a conventional domestic partnership, embracing their chosen single parenthood as a form of empowerment. It seems as if almost everyone bearing a child is writing a book about it, but Brockes is too original a personality to fall in quietly with the rest.A disarming and casually hilarious take on the opposite of co-parenting.

Kirkus Reviews