People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Competitive Crafters, Drop-Off Despots, and Other Suburban Scourges

People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Competitive Crafters, Drop-Off Despots, and Other Suburban Scourges

4.1 18
by Jen Mann
     
 

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NATIONAL BESTSELLER

A debut collection of witty, biting essays laced with a surprising warmth, from Jen Mann, the writer behind the popular blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat
 
People I want to punch in the throat:
• anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer

Overview

NATIONAL BESTSELLER

A debut collection of witty, biting essays laced with a surprising warmth, from Jen Mann, the writer behind the popular blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat
 
People I want to punch in the throat:
• anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer
• humblebraggers
• people who treat their pets like children
 
Jen Mann doesn’t have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, her fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of mothers’ night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship (the one you have with your cleaning lady), nothing is sacred or off-limits. So the next time you find yourself wearing fuzzy bunny pajamas in the school carpool line or accidentally stuck at a co-worker’s swingers party, just think, What would Jen Mann do? Or better yet, buy her book.

Advance praise for People I Want to Punch in the Throat
 
People I Want to Punch in the Throat is so good that it’ll make you want to adopt all the cats in the world. I’m not sure about the correlation, but it’s that good. It should come with a warning.”—Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened
 
“Jen Mann has an amazing way of telling stories that will make you cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. From swinger parties to racist toddlers, she makes the suburbs unbelievably funny.”—Karen Alpert, author of I Heart My Little A-Holes
 
“Jen Mann says the things we’re all too afraid to say. Her honest and hilarious writing style reminds me of David Sedaris and Tina Fey.”—Robin O’Bryant, author of Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves
 
“Jen Mann’s shrewd and unrelenting assault on the absurdity of suburban life is an honest peek into the occasional nightmare that is part of living the American dream. I love Jen. I wish she was my neighbor. It’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who wants to punch almost everyone in the f***ing throat.”—Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink And Swear

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher
Advance praise for People I Want to Punch in the Throat
 
People I Want to Punch in the Throat is so good that it’ll make you want to adopt all the cats in the world. I’m not sure about the correlation, but it’s that good. It should come with a warning.”—Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened
 
“Jen Mann has an amazing way of telling stories that will make you cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. From swinger parties to racist toddlers, she makes the suburbs unbelievably funny.”—Karen Alpert, author of I Heart My Little A-Holes
 
“Jen Mann says the things we’re all too afraid to say. Her honest and hilarious writing style reminds me of David Sedaris and Tina Fey.”—Robin O’Bryant, author of Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves
 
“Jen Mann’s shrewd and unrelenting assault on the absurdity of suburban life is an honest peek into the occasional nightmare that is part of living the American dream. I love Jen. I wish she was my neighbor. It’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who wants to punch almost everyone in the f***ing throat.”—Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink And Swear

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9780345549839
Publisher:
Random House Publishing Group
Publication date:
09/09/2014
Pages:
224
Sales rank:
96,648
Product dimensions:
5.10(w) x 7.90(h) x 0.70(d)

Read an Excerpt

9780345549839|excerpt

Mann / PEOPLE I WANT TO PUNCH IN THE THROAT

PEOPLE I WANT TO PUNCH IN THE THROAT: A SHORT LIST

My parents. Seriously, who spells their kid’s name “Jenni” with an adorable i? I guess they never expected me to be a doctor.

Anyone who thinks I really named my kids Gomer and Adolpha. Their real names are actually worse.

That one guy who sits in the middle of Starbucks yelling into his stupid Bluetooth about a bullshit quarterly report. We all hope you choke on your latte.

Extreme couponers who hold up the checkout line over thirty frickin’ cents. I’m mostly pissed off because I always forget my coupons at home.

People who treat their pets like children. No further explanation needed.

Anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer. I blame Pinterest for this shit.

The guy in front of me at McDonald’s the other day who asked, “What’s good here?” Even the guy behind the counter didn’t know how to answer.

Humble braggers. If you have something to brag about, then just own it.

Anyone who names their kid after a Kardashian or a Twilight character. Trust me, no one believes that you just “thought up” the name North on your own.

Moms who tell me my life would be so much easier if I implemented “systems.” Oh, fuck you.

People who tell me not to swear so much. Oh, fuck you, too.

People who think this book might be about them. Don’t be so vain. You’re not the only asshat I know.

Meet the Author

In addition to her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Jen Mann has also written for The Huffington Post, Babble, Circle of Moms, and CNN Headline News. She was voted one of Circle of Moms Top 25 Funniest Mom Blogs for 2012 and 2013 and chosen by the same site as one of the “Most Influential” bloggers. She was a BlogHer Voice of the Year in 2012 and 2013 and was a finalist for two Bloggies in 2013 (Weblog of the Year and Best Parenting Weblog). In 2012 she self-published a debut collection of essays, Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat. She lives in the suburbs of Kansas with her husband (aka “the Hubs”) and is the mother of two children, whom she calls Gomer and Adolpha on her blog. She swears their real names are actually worse.

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People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Competitive Crafters, Drop-Off Despots, and Other Suburban Scourges 4.1 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 18 reviews.
BrandieC More than 1 year ago
2.5 stars I had never heard of Jen Mann before I read People I Want to Punch in the Throat. The book apparently shares its name with Mann's blog, and it reads as a collection of loosely related blog posts. While I was amused at times by some of her anecdotes, I did not find it laugh out loud funny, and I certainly would not compare Mann to Erma Bombeck as some commentators have done. Mann's humor lacks broad appeal; because most of her posts/chapters center around her husband and young children, they do not create that "I've been there" moment which is critical for this type of written humor to succeed, for either non-parents or those, like me, whose children are long grown. The measure of a successful blogger-turned-book author is how much the book makes me want to check out the blog; with Mann, I felt no such desire. Readers looking for a comedic blogger whose style has successfully transferred to book form would be better served by looking for Allie Brosh's Hyperbole and a Half. I received a free copy of People I Want to Punch in the Throat through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
JillianReadLoveBlog More than 1 year ago
Ok, so I love Jen Mann. If you don’t know of her, or her laugh-so-hard-you-snort blog, People I Want To Punch In The Throat, then I am here to introduce you to some of the funniest and most real parent and life posts you will ever read. No really. And if you do know of her, high-five! Her newest book, People I Want To Punch In The Throat: Competitive Crafters, Drop-Off Despots, and Other Suburban Scourges, touches on all of the joyous *heavy on the sarcasm* wonders of being a suburban mom in the prim and proper Pinterest age….and it is one of the funniest books I’ve ever read. Question: Have you ever left your house in pj’s to drop a kid off thinking no one will ever see those pj’s, only to find out you HAVE to get out of the car and parade your pj clad self into the school? -OR- Had to suffer through a playdate chatting it up with a mom who, under any other circumstances, you would never want to associate with for even one tenth of a nanosecond, but because your kids are friends and you HAVE to stay through the playdate you’e stuck with said parent? -OR- How about dealing with those obsessive parents, living vicariously through their kids to make up for all that lacked in their own childhood?  They are gems…. I see you nodding after reading those questions and that’s exactly why you need this book. Not only does Jen write her completely relatable experiences, but she writes with such snarky comedy genius that you can’t NOT laugh. I mean I annoyed the hell out of my poor husband while reading this because I would be reading, start laughing, shove the book under his nose and say: “read this! It’s just like *censored to save face with my friends and neighbors*!”. And guess what? He thought it was hilarious, too! But aside from the hilarity of this book, is that fact that Jen puts it all in perspective. Life, kids, parenting, suburban society, the pressures of raising kids in an age where Pinterest makes you feel like a slacker every time you log on…. all of it. She makes us realize we aren’t alone in this craziness and that it’s ok to take life with a grain of salt. It’s ok to not want to suffer through a play date or not want to spend 6 months crafting dat and night for a kid’s birthday party. It’s ok to head out without makeup on and in your bunny pj’s. It’s ok to want to punch people in the throat! So while this book is a break from my normal genres, I will always pick up a book written by Jen because she reminds us that life isn’t perfect and you may as well have a good laugh along the way! Thanks Jen, you freaking rock and I love ya lots!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Recommended for mothers with small children
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Exceptionally funny, irreverent, pulls no punches, and shows no mercy. Jen Mann dares to say what so many of us think every day about all those idiots that drive us crazy, but don't have the nerve to say out loud.
mamie52 More than 1 year ago
Not as funny as I had anticipated, but it did have a few good chuckles. I did identify with some of her frustrations.
Anonymous 5 months ago
Her blog is fuuny, this book very dissapointing.
samalama143 More than 1 year ago
Hi-larious!! A fantastic! funny as book! READ IT!!!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Love every page of it and couldnt out it down.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I have read many humorous books written by female authors and NONE come close to this. Joan Rivers last novel doesnt hold a candle to this. Im anxiously awaiting ANYTHING else written by Jenn Mann. Im sad im done with this, as it is dead on accurate.
hanbridturner More than 1 year ago
I made a spur-of-the-moment decision to buy this book out of my need to read something different and a horrible case of reader's block. It turns out that I made the perfect choice! This book is downright hilarious and a super quick read. It's easy to get lost in the weird situations and relationships  of suburban life the author shares with us, and this book constantly reminds you of just how crazy people really are. As to why I gave this book four stars--this is not the fault of the book or author. It's my fault; although I loved reading every chapter, there were a lot of things I couldn't relate to simply because I'm a) a lot younger than the author, b) only recently married and c) don't have kids. But that didn't make the book less enjoyable for me, and I still recommend it.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I feel like i could have written this book.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I just finished this book and am absolutely dying, I'm certain that Jen is my spirit animal. Also, as a non-Kansas City dwelling Kansas resident, I would like to thank you for confirming every stereotype ever about Johnson County dwellers. Don't mind me while I buy the rest of your books and read all 300 of your blog posts and then cry when I run out and have to wait for new material.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Absolutely hilarious
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I really like this book because i had tons of conections to it exept for i dont have kids or a partner because im only 11. Can you beleive that? I was suprised how similer we were. I find it creepy, aspeshly since shes wwwwwaaaaaayyyyyyyy older than me. But i guess thats okay. Well, aaa, im goning to stop typing now since my arms starting to hurt, and i supose this isnot helping, but acculaly my arms feals better, so i could just keep this up and make this dddddddddddddddddddrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggggggggggggggggg out, but really i only like to do that when i have to write 10 paragragh essays. Do you really think this will drag out for ever, if so your rite in a way, but in a way your wrong because my arms getting tired agen. Sssssssoooooooo read this book, dont litter, and save water, espeshilly if you live in CA, and no that does not mean canada it means californai. Oh and if you play transformice freind me, my user name is "Snuferfuses" spelled exactly as its spelled back there just with out the quotashins. BYE.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I have been following Jen Mann on her blog and absolutly adore her. She make me laugh hysterically! She say's exactly what I am thinking but am usually to timid to say! 
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Great, funny, easy read! Hilarous and true!