Private Lies

Private Lies

4.0 5
by Frank Pittman
     
 

Why do half the people in marriages have affairs? What problems are they trying to solve?
Using actual case studies, as well as examples from music, literature, and film, Dr. Pittman identifies four basic patterns of infidelity—the accidental encounter, habitual philandering, marital arrangements, and romance—discussed how to limit the damage that

Overview

Why do half the people in marriages have affairs? What problems are they trying to solve?
Using actual case studies, as well as examples from music, literature, and film, Dr. Pittman identifies four basic patterns of infidelity—the accidental encounter, habitual philandering, marital arrangements, and romance—discussed how to limit the damage that affairs do, and offers practical suggestions on how to make a marriage work.

Editorial Reviews

Maggie Scarf
“Dr. Pittman takes us on a remarkably informative foray into the unknown territory of marital infidelity. Private Lies manages to be delightfully readable, compassionate and awfully funny at the same time.”
Pat Conroy
“Private Lies is the Reconstruction, the National Recovery Act, and the Marshall Plan for families devastated by the flakiness and fluff of the Me Decade. It is a funny, personable, anecdotal yet clearly resounding, fundamental, visionary call for nothing so American as marriage and family. Pittman's program is an appeal through the last few centuries for those old American verities: truth, fidelity, and loyalty. The missiles that destroy the American family, the bombs dropped on the American home, the grenades that split us apart were the neurotic weapons of lies and deceptions. Truth, he tells us, and fidelity are the true and powerful weapons of peace, hope, and unity in the American family. A timely, courageous, necessary message.”
Publishers Weekly - Publisher's Weekly
For people who suspect their spouses are having a secret romantic affair, or are coping with the aftermath of one, this primer offers sensible counsel, albeit in pedestrian, chatty prose. From case studies of 100 adulterous couples whom he has treated, Pittman, a psychiatrist in Atlanta, draws profiles of four basic patterns of betrayal: accidental flings which ``just happen''; habitual philandering, which he believes to be motivated by insecurity and fear of the opposite sex; crazy, in-love romantic states that cloud one's judgment; and marital arrangements ranging from sexual supplements to flamboyant revenge affairs. His deflation of ``popular myths'' about affairs is less than startling. More helpful are sections on what to look for in a marriage partner, dealing with jealousy, remarriage (unions between a divorcing partner and the ``affairee'' have a low success rate) and the traumatic effects of secret affairs on children. First serial to Self. (Jan.)

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9780393026344
Publisher:
Norton, W. W. & Company, Inc.
Publication date:
01/28/1989
Edition description:
1st ed
Pages:
312
Sales rank:
1,263,175
Product dimensions:
5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.81(d)

Meet the Author

Frank Pittman, M.D., was a psychiatrist and family therapist in Atlanta, Georgia. A renowned author of many books, he also wrote a regular column, "Ask Dr. Frank", which appeared in Psychology Today, and was a regular contributor to Psychotherapy Networker. He died in 2012.

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