Puzzled: A Memoir about Growing Up with OCD
Growing up with undiagnosed OCD sure isn't easy, and here Pan Cooke shares his own experiences with that condition in a memoir that is as funny as it is powerfully candid and openhearted.

Pan Cooke is ten years old when anxious thoughts begin to take over his brain like pieces of an impossible puzzle. What if he blurts out a swear word while in church? What if he accidentally writes something mean in his classmate's get-well card? What if his friend's racy photo of a supermodel ends up in his own homework and is discovered by his teacher? More and more, he becomes hijacked by fears that can only be calmed through exhausting, time-consuming rituals.

Pan has no way of knowing that this anxiety puzzle and the stressful attempts to solve it are evidence of a condition called Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. This is his story of living with and eventually learning about OCD. Told with endearing honesty and humor, Puzzled shows the listener the importance of empathy for oneself and those going through something they don't yet understand.
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Puzzled: A Memoir about Growing Up with OCD
Growing up with undiagnosed OCD sure isn't easy, and here Pan Cooke shares his own experiences with that condition in a memoir that is as funny as it is powerfully candid and openhearted.

Pan Cooke is ten years old when anxious thoughts begin to take over his brain like pieces of an impossible puzzle. What if he blurts out a swear word while in church? What if he accidentally writes something mean in his classmate's get-well card? What if his friend's racy photo of a supermodel ends up in his own homework and is discovered by his teacher? More and more, he becomes hijacked by fears that can only be calmed through exhausting, time-consuming rituals.

Pan has no way of knowing that this anxiety puzzle and the stressful attempts to solve it are evidence of a condition called Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. This is his story of living with and eventually learning about OCD. Told with endearing honesty and humor, Puzzled shows the listener the importance of empathy for oneself and those going through something they don't yet understand.
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Puzzled: A Memoir about Growing Up with OCD

Puzzled: A Memoir about Growing Up with OCD

by Pan Cooke

Narrated by Pan Cooke

Unabridged — 1 hours, 0 minutes

Puzzled: A Memoir about Growing Up with OCD

Puzzled: A Memoir about Growing Up with OCD

by Pan Cooke

Narrated by Pan Cooke

Unabridged — 1 hours, 0 minutes

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Overview

Growing up with undiagnosed OCD sure isn't easy, and here Pan Cooke shares his own experiences with that condition in a memoir that is as funny as it is powerfully candid and openhearted.

Pan Cooke is ten years old when anxious thoughts begin to take over his brain like pieces of an impossible puzzle. What if he blurts out a swear word while in church? What if he accidentally writes something mean in his classmate's get-well card? What if his friend's racy photo of a supermodel ends up in his own homework and is discovered by his teacher? More and more, he becomes hijacked by fears that can only be calmed through exhausting, time-consuming rituals.

Pan has no way of knowing that this anxiety puzzle and the stressful attempts to solve it are evidence of a condition called Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. This is his story of living with and eventually learning about OCD. Told with endearing honesty and humor, Puzzled shows the listener the importance of empathy for oneself and those going through something they don't yet understand.

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

"The novel’s clean, unadorned art style enhances the persuasive verbal and visual jigsaw metaphor, which clearly evidences the creator’s lonely hardship as his numerous attempts to solve the unrelenting Puzzle fail. In a closing chapter, Cooke shares his first experience attending therapy, provides a digestible introduction to OCD’s multiple forms and symptoms, and dispels common myths about the disorder.” —Publishers Weekly


"The cheery colors in many of the panels serve as a stark contrast to the dark thoughts in Pan’s head, while the blue-gray panels illustrating Pan’s thought spirals emphasize his distress. Pan’s striking story handles mental health withcare and precision, dispelling myths about OCD and providing readers with the language necessary to discuss its signs and symptoms. Readers will also appreciate the quick yet comprehensive overview of cognitive behavioral therapy treatment toward the end. A harrowing yet ultimately hopeful look at the manifestation of mental illness.” —Kirkus


"A vulnerable account of trying to fit in, finding your place in the world, and the experience of being a regular teen while living with chronic intrusive thoughts. The vivid graphic representations of these intrusive thoughts in the main character Pan’s mind tangibly illustrate the struggles that they face, while the supporting text demonstrates how they operate outwardly in the public sphere. The author gives a realistic and frank perspective to symptoms and signs of the disorder, while also dispelling the myths and stereotypes that are often associated with it. A powerful graphic novel memoir that gives readers an authenticaccount of life with OC.” —School Library Journal

Kirkus Reviews

2024-01-19
An Irish boy navigates coming of age while living with OCD in this graphic memoir.

At 10, Pan realized he was different from his friends. While they obsessed over Pokémon cards, Pan, who has light skin and a mop of tousled brown hair, found that he battled intrusive thoughts that kept him awake well into the night. He calls these thoughts “the Puzzle.” His efforts to find solutions included repetitive prayers, compulsive counting, and an eventual descent into disordered eating, all while navigating his school career. Pan attends a Catholic school and questions whether he’s possessed by the devil, if God is speaking to him, or if he’s just plain “crazy.” When his symptoms turn physical, he seeks help from myriad specialists. The doctors find nothing physically wrong with him, so he takes to the internet for assistance and stumbles upon his eventual diagnosis of OCD. The cheery colors in many of the panels serve as a stark contrast to the dark thoughts in Pan’s head, while the blue-gray panels illustrating Pan’s thought spirals emphasize his distress. Pan’s striking story handles mental health with care and precision, dispelling myths about OCD and providing readers with the language necessary to discuss its signs and symptoms. Readers will also appreciate the quick yet comprehensive overview of cognitive behavioral therapy treatment toward the end.

A harrowing yet ultimately hopeful look at the manifestation of mental illness. (content warning) (Graphic memoir. 10-14)

Product Details

BN ID: 2940194311507
Publisher: Penguin Random House
Publication date: 07/22/2025
Edition description: Unabridged
Age Range: 10 - 13 Years
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