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Raising a Modern-Day Princess

Raising a Modern-Day Princess

4.8 10
by Pam Farrel, Doreen Hanna

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In the same tradition as Raising a Modern-Day Knight, this book is designed to equip parents to cultivate strong relationships with their adolescents. Raising a Modern-Day Princess stresses the importance of creating a rite of passage for teen girls—a defining moment in which girls can be blessed by significant adults in their lives, and a call for


In the same tradition as Raising a Modern-Day Knight, this book is designed to equip parents to cultivate strong relationships with their adolescents. Raising a Modern-Day Princess stresses the importance of creating a rite of passage for teen girls—a defining moment in which girls can be blessed by significant adults in their lives, and a call for their families and communities to celebrate and support them as they enter womanhood. This book offers practical help in raising a generation of women to see themselves as God sees them—as daughters of the King.

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher
Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White—how many girls, at some point, dream of being a princess like these fairy-tale characters?
In Raising a Modern-Day Princess, authors Pam Farrel and Doreen Hanna come alongside mothers and mentors to offer practical help in raising a generation of women to see themselves as God sees them—as daughters of the King, true modern-day princesses. In an easy-to-use step-by-step style, the authors show moms how to create a fun-filled and life-changing rite-of-passage experience celebrating their daughters’ crossover into womanhood. There’s also an entire chapter to help dads or father figures understand the vital role they play in their daughters’ lives. With personal stories and advice from real moms and daughters, this book speaks to the heart of every woman who longs to instill in her daughter a true sense of purpose, value, and strength.

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Tyndale House Publishers
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5.50(w) x 8.10(h) x 0.90(d)

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Raising a Modern-Day Princess


Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.

Copyright © 2009 Pam Farrel and Doreen Hanna
All right reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-58997-574-3

Chapter One

Seeking My Father's Blessing: What Every Young Woman Longs For

"I'll be a Father to you; you'll be sons and daughters to me." The Word of the Master, God. —2 Corinthians 6:18 (MSG)

I am a princess. All girls are. Even if they live in tiny old attics; even if they dress in rags; even if they aren't pretty, or smart, or young. They're still princesses. All of us. Didn't your father ever tell you that? Didn't he? —A Little Princess (1995)

Lying in my bed, I [Doreen] lifted the shade and peeked out the window. Except for a sprinkle of stars and a sliver of a moon, it was now pitch-black outside. My sister's gentle snore let me know she was sound asleep. The TV was off and I had heard my parents' bedroom door close. It was time for my escape.

Earlier in the day I had picked out my best purse for this "runaway." It was red, rectangular in shape, with hinges on it, like a little suitcase, and a mirror on the lid. It could only hold my hairbrush, two pairs of panties, and a package of crackers. But for an eight-year-old, that was good enough. I was ready to go.

However, I began to have doubts. I considered how hard it would be to walk down the hall past my parents' bedroom without them hearing me because there was a board in the floor of the hallway that creaked. But if I attempted to open the heavy wooden window of our bedroom and tried to remove the screen, I knew for sure that my sister would wake up.

Suddenly, or so it seemed, those warm covers felt so good as I heard the wind blow through the trees on that chilly, late winter's eve. I couldn't seem to keep my eyes open. I fought it, but it felt like someone was gently closing them. The next thing I knew, it was morning, and once again, I had failed to make my great escape.

This scenario played out many times in my elementary years. But it wasn't until I was in my twenties, seeking help for challenges in my marriage, that I discovered why I continued to replay leaving home but never making my way out.

As a child, there were certain securities that kept me there. My mother loved me, food was always on the table, and I had a lovely home to live in. We lived in a middle-class neighborhood where I enjoyed many childhood friendships. I enjoyed spending time with both sets of grandparents who lived close by.

I remember the enjoyment of watching Leave It to Beaver and Father Knows Best on TV and wishing my dad was like one of those TV dads. From the age of five well into my teens, I loved watching the Miss America beauty pageants, and wished that I would someday be beautiful enough to be crowned a princess.

I wept deeply for the first time in my life as I spoke those words out loud to my counselor. He sat and listened as I began to describe occurrences that clearly displayed the lack of my father's acceptance throughout my life. This seemed to open the floodgates of memories and hurt and angry feelings I felt toward my father.

Seen but Not Heard

I recollected how resentful I was toward my dad for so often sending my sister and me to bed by six-thirty in the evening so he could have our mother to himself. Many summer nights I would peer out my bedroom window, yearning to be with the rest of the kids on the block who were playing hide-and-seek at dusk while I was supposed to be sleeping; all because my dad thought children were to be "seen and not heard." I believed that this was just a convenient out for him on many occasions, when those words followed his request that we leave the room.

I expressed to the counselor how I was told by my mother every night, for the first 12 years of my life, to "go and kiss your father good night," no matter how I felt. He most often sat comfortably in his easy chair, watching TV, expectant of my nightly kiss. I could not remember one time in my childhood when he came to tuck my sister or me into bed and kiss us goodnight. That longing was heightened when I saw my friends' dads do this for them whenever I had spent a night in their homes.

I recounted how, in my teen years, I dreaded our nightly family dinners. I would set the table thinking, What will he find fault with tonight? Would it be my acne? Or would I draw his criticism for putting butter on my bread? Or maybe it would be my posture, bringing a threat that he was going to make a wood brace that would force me to sit up straight. His harsh, critical words about my appearance caused me to feel that I would never gain his favor or have boys interested in me.

I Will Prove Him Wrong

By this time I was becoming rebellious. I was determined to prove him wrong. I would get a boyfriend.

I found, in those early teen years, that flirting with the boys brought quick attention and some form of emotional gratification. I was so hungry for them to compliment me or just kiss me—validating me as a young woman. I didn't understand why all the other girls didn't flirt with the boys like I did. I thought it was fun. I lost the trust of some girlfriends and made enemies playing that game, luring the other girls' boyfriends away from them. But the relationships were short-lived so I thought, What's the big deal?

I looked for every opportunity to be away from home—a school football game, a party, a church activity, or anything else that was acceptable to my mother. My dad never minded how much time I spent away from home unless it interfered with the chores he required of me. In fact, I truly believed Dad appreciated my time away from home as much as I did.

By the age of 17, I was a senior in high school and had dated almost every guy I had hoped to. However, that had left me very lonely. I didn't even have a date to the senior prom. I had proved my father wrong, but all to no avail. I had isolated numerous potential girlfriends and was left with no boyfriend. I had a huge hole in my heart and nothing seemed to fill it.

The Man of My Dreams

Within two weeks of my high-school graduation, the man of my dreams came into my life. He had just finished a three-year term in the army and had returned home to establish himself in civilian life. He was the potential "catch" for every girl between the ages of 18 and 22 in the church where our families had attended for many years.

He was 22 years old and very handsome, over six feet tall, blue eyes, a great sense of humor, and—very important to a beach-city girl—a surfer! One night, as I jumped into the backseat of his parents' car for a ride home from church, there sat Chad. I was excited but jittery, knowing I was sitting right next to the "catch." I spoke more to his parents than to him because I was so nervous.

His dad pulled up in front of my house. As I slipped out of the car, Chad said, "Boy, those are some great legs!" My heart leaped—Chad Hanna thought I was pretty! By Friday he'd asked me out and within six months we were engaged.

At barely 19 years of age, marriage seemed like the best solution to escape my father's house. My dad viewed life with a strong work ethic. He did not regard higher education as a necessity and had informed me that if I were to consider going away to college, I'd have to pay for it myself. That seemed impossible. So I was soon working full-time and saving my money for a beautiful wedding.

My father was not happy that I was marrying Chad. I remember one day, just weeks before the wedding, he said to me, "I thought this would be a time in your life when you could spend some time with me." I couldn't believe my ears! I was instantly angry and thought, He's ignored me for the last 19 years of my life and NOW he wants to spend time with me? It was the first time in my life that I sensed I had begun to build a wall in my heart—a wall that I thought would keep my father from hurting me anymore.

The day of the wedding, as I stood waiting to go down the aisle on my father's arm, he turned and touched the edge of my veil. I thought for just a second that we were going to share a special moment. Instead he stated, "My mother would have never let this happen." I looked to see that my veil had been trimmed slightly unevenly. "Your grandmother would have trimmed this in satin," he stated proudly. Rightly so, my grandmother was a well-known seamstress and had I asked, I'm sure she would have done it for me. Once again, I had failed to meet my father's standards.

Still, that walk down the aisle gave me such hope. I had proven that I could find a man to love me and would finally be free from my father. I believed that saying "I do" would eliminate my frustrated and angry feelings toward him. Yet, there I sat in a counselor's office 10 years later, dealing with all my "father" issues.

Break Down the Wall

With kindness and gentleness, my counselor helped me realize that the wall I had built in my heart ultimately never hurt my father; it only hurt me. He continued by saying that I would never be free emotionally or spiritually until I could forgive my father. OFFER forgiveness? I couldn't believe it. I thought to myself, Shouldn't my dad be seeking MY forgiveness?

As I left the counselor's office, pondering his advice to forgive my father, I drove to my parents' home to have a chat with my mother. I was considering the possibility that my memories might be distorted, and I wanted to gain her perspective.

As we sat and talked, things began to unfold. She told me something I had never really understood before. I was a honeymoon baby. My father was not only shocked that, at 19 years of age, he was going to be a father within months of being married, he was also very disappointed that he was going to have the responsibilities of a father. He had told my mother prior to their wedding that he wasn't ready for children and had wanted to wait at least five years before starting a family.

So, upon my birth he found me an obstacle to having my mother fully to himself. Aha! Now I was beginning to understand why I had been sent to bed by six-thirty so many nights of my life!

My mom also told me how critical his mother and other members of my father's family had been toward him as a child, calling him various "pet names" that were very degrading. He, too, at the age of 18 couldn't wait to marry and flee from his home.

Driving home after chatting with my mom, I thought about what she had told me and seriously considered the words of my counselor. His desire was to free me from the inner turmoil that comes from harboring unforgiveness. In addition, he pointed out how this turmoil was overflowing into my marriage relationship—the reason I was there to see him originally! He explained to me that I had put many of my unfulfilled expectations of my father onto my husband. He then humorously expressed, "It would take at least three men to fulfill all that you are expecting your husband to fulfill!"

As I walked through the door of our home that night, I determined that I would seek Chad's forgiveness for the unrealistically high expectations I had placed upon him during our marriage. That night as we slipped into bed, I expressed to him how I now realized why I had been asking so much of him. I was trying to have him fulfill what I had desired from my father all of my life. He understood my feelings and forgave me. I closed my eyes, at peace now with my husband, but still—what about my dad?

The Power of the Blessing

Within weeks after my counselor's challenge to forgive my father—which I wasn't yet ready to do—I went to a local bookstore to pick up a gift for a friend. While there, I happened to also pick up a book titled The Gift of the Blessing, authored by John Trent and Gary Smalley (Thomas Nelson, Inc., 1993). My eyes were immediately drawn to the following sentence on the cover:

Dr. John Trent tells of his search to receive the blessing from his father and how, with the new insight he received from God through that search, he has sought to pick up the pieces of his shattered dream.

Those words jumped out at me. My dreams had been shattered and I was trying to pick up the pieces. And I surely did not want to be like my father. I wanted to do things differently for my daughters. I bought the book and began reading.

Chapter after chapter, I remember thinking, Oh, how I wish my father had done that for me. My self-pity was stopped short in the last chapter when Dr. Trent presented this challenge: "If you have not received your parents' blessing, begin to bless them and see what God will do." I was again confronted to face my "father" issues head-on.

Within days of finishing the book, I called my father and asked if I could take him to lunch—just the two of us. He said "yes" without hesitation, and we met together the next day. I can still remember exactly where we sat at a small Mexican restaurant in Cave Creek, Arizona.

As he finished his last few bites of an enchilada, I mustered up the courage to share my feelings. "Dad, I now know that when I was a child you demonstrated your love by providing a home for us, nice clothes, and food on the table. However, I've always felt that you didn't like me." Those were some of the hardest words I had ever spoken. I felt that by saying this out loud to my father, I was taking the risk of his complete rejection.

Conversely, he quickly responded, saying almost word for word what my mother had said about him: "I didn't want children immediately after marriage, and I was taught that children were to be seen and not heard." I could sense regret in his words, and it was reflected in his demeanor. For the first time in my life I felt sorry for my father, and the wall I had built in my heart began to crumble.

When he had finished talking, I said, "Dad, I want to have a good relationship with you; one that also includes my husband and children. With the counseling I have received recently, I've come to realize that I've had a deep resentment toward you for a long time. I would like for us to have a better relationship from here on, and I need to ask for your forgiveness. Will you forgive me?"

My father's eyes welled with tears as he replied, "Yes I will, and will you forgive me?"

I wept out those healing words: "Yes, Dad, I forgive you."

Wow! What a huge step in our relationship. While, in all honesty, I had hoped to hear "I love you," I was satisfied at that time with, "Will you forgive me?"

As the years progressed, our father/daughter relationship began to grow. We could laugh and talk together for the first time in our lives. From that day—he in his forties and I in my twenties—we were both seeking to grow spiritually, prompting engaging discussions between us. In addition, at our now numerous family gatherings, I would delight as I watched my father and Chad enjoy each other's company.

The Perfect Father's Day Card

Some years later, I remember searching for several weeks, seeking to find the perfect Father's Day card. At the end of a discouraging search, I felt prompted to pray and ask the Lord if He had something that He wanted me to write for my father. As I lifted my head from prayer, it was as if suddenly the creative writer that was deep within me came out and my fingers began to speed across the keyboard, typing out a poem for my father.

I had never felt that I had a poetic gift until that day! I sat in amazement of my own work as I reread the poem. I quickly printed it out and sent it on its way to arrive by Father's Day.

My father and I were living several hundred miles apart at this time, so the following Sunday I called to wish him a happy Father's Day. I was so eager to find out whether he'd received the poem and hear his reaction to it that I urgently asked, "Dad, did you get my poem?"

He, rather casually, just said, "Yes, it was nice."

My heart dropped. I thought the poem was fabulous, and all I got was an "It was nice." I made every effort to mask my disappointment in his response. We went on to other topics of conversation. But as we were closing our phone call, he said, "I love you, Mija." Whenever my father called me Mija (a Spanish word of endearment), I always knew I was in his good graces. This was big—very big! I heard an "I love you" coupled with a "Mija!"

I quickly responded, "I love you, too, Dad." I got off the phone and fell into a heap of happy tears. I had heard the words I had yearned to hear all of my life from my father: "I love you."

Several months later, I had a business trip that took me to Phoenix, Arizona, where my parents lived. When I arrived at my parents' home, only my mother was there. We chatted for a few minutes and then she said, "Before your father gets here, I must show you something." She took me into their bedroom, and there on the wall hung a two-by-three-foot copy of the poem, done in calligraphy on parchment paper and lacquered to a beautiful piece of wood. I wept with joy, not only realizing how much he valued that gift, but also appreciating how often since that Father's Day he had told me he loved me.

In that reflective moment, the thought came to me that I was living out the last chapter of the The Gift of the Blessing, which stated, "If you want to be a person who honors your parents, you will be a person who blesses them. When you truly honor them and do what is right in God's eyes, it will even prolong your life; living free of resentment and unforgiveness does prolong our lives, enabling us to live years longer!"

Pam's Search

We sat across the table in a restaurant in Canada. My husband, Bill, and I had just appeared on the TV show Marriage Uncensored with Dave and Christie. Over dinner Dr. Dave Currie and his wife, Donalyn, along with Bill and I, were talking about our children and our families of origin. Dave and his wife have two remarkable daughters, whom we had met as they sat in the studio audience that night.

As we sat at the table that evening, Dave shared a story that penetrated me to the core. When his daughter Jody was a very little girl, she came home and announced her love interest in a little boy. Dave said to her, "Honey, when you are much older, there will be a day when you will want to give your heart to a man. He will have to be really special, and you will need to feel confident that he is the one God wants you to marry. Until then, I will keep your heart. I will keep it safe."

Dave's wife made a heart that hung in the Currie home and on it hung two gold keys, one for each daughter. Any time Dave prayed with his daughters, tucked them into bed, or acted out any of the other daily interactions a loving father would have with his daughter, he'd say, "And who has the key to your heart?" His daughters would answer, "You do, Daddy." Any time he had to set a rule or make a correction he would begin with, "Remember who has the key to your heart?" And the girls would answer, "You do, Daddy."


Excerpted from Raising a Modern-Day Princess by PAM FARREL DOREEN HANNA Copyright © 2009 by Pam Farrel and Doreen Hanna. Excerpted by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

What People are Saying About This

Jim Burns
As a father of three daughters, I could not put this book down until I finished it. Every page is practical, inspiring, and life-changing.
Jim Burns, Ph.D., President of HomeWord and author of Teaching Your Children Healthy Sexuality
Patsy Clairmont
Attention all moms and mentors: do not pass by this book! This is an opportunity to have your daughter come into the fullness of being a true modern-day princess.
Fern Nichols
Pam and Doreen unfold life-giving words to moms and dads on how they can instill grace, worth, dignity, inner beauty, and destiny into the lives of their daughters. Whether you implement one or all of the ideas in this book, you will find this book invaluable as you invest in the lives of your daughters.
Fern Nichols, President and founder of Moms In Touch International

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Raising a Modern-Day Princess: Inspiring Purpose, Value, and Strength in Your Daughter 4.8 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 10 reviews.
Stevenkat27 More than 1 year ago
In Raising a Modern Day Princess, authors Pam Farrel and Doreen Hanna, come alongside mothers and mentors to offer practical help in raising a generation of women to see themselves as God sees them - as daughters of the King, true modern-day princesses. In an easy-to-use step-by-step style, the authors show moms how to create a fun-filled and life changing rite-of-passage experience celebrating their daughters' crossover into womanhood. There's also an entire chapter to help dads and father figures understand the vital role that they play in their daughter's lives. With personal stories and advice from real moms and daughters, this book speaks to the heart of every woman who longs to instill in her daughter a true sense of purpose, value, and strength...(back cover excerpt). I absolutely adored this book and I received it at the perfect time while my oldest daughter is entering her senior year. It provided me with the opportunity in the short time I have left with my oldest to do all I can in this coming year to be the dad, and mentor I need to be to instill in her, all that God wants her to be. The quotes scattered throughout the book are right from fairy tales and famous movies that instill the positive qualities we hope our daughters will carry on into their lives, families and marriages. The book talks to not only moms but as women the girls whose lives they touch as friends and mentors and how important it is for them to take the time and really teach these younger women what a Proverbs 31 woman is really like. In one chapter, it talks about providing a ceremony where you can provide their first promise ring and teach them the importance on staying holy, or you can use a graduation from high school to gather together friends and family to share their insights on watching her grow from childhood to becoming an adult. I personally think its what every daughter truly dreams of, is that recognition that she is an adult and thus, how proud of her and her accomplishments in getting this far. I received this book compliments of Tyndale House Publishers for this review and like I said, its great for anyone who impacts the lives of girls under 21, be it grandparents, pastors, parents, family members and friends. This is a must have. There is so much knowledge to be gained by reading this book and hoping it makes me a more profound role model in my daughter's life For more information about this book, and where you can purchase a copy, click on the link below: http://mediacenter.tyndale.com/1_products/details.asp?isbn=978-1-58997-574-3
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Wonderful book need to read if you have a daughter!
THaskins More than 1 year ago
When I saw this book, Raising a Modern-Day Princess.inspiring purpose, value, and strength in your daughter by Pam Farrel and Doreen Hanna, as a book review selection by Tyndale House Publishers (complimentary copy provided), I hoped God had provided this resource as an answer to prayer. To be honest, I wasn't sure what type of information would be provided; or if the information would be valuable, applicable to my situation or even worth the time invested to read it. I was in a desperate tween-daughter drama and was pleading/searching/praying for His direction and guidance. I have learned to keep my eyes open to everything that crosses my path during these times, trusting completely He WILL provide an answer. I was extremely pleased with this step by step curriculum resource for celebrating your daughter's rite of passage to womanhood. In the first chapter, both authors share their relationship with their father and how important it is that daughters receive approval and acceptance from their dad (or father figure). I agree 100%; having experienced the same revelation in my own life. Chapter two explains what a rite of passage entails in various cultures. Chapter three reveals the power of words-and the importance of encouraging your daughter in every aspect of her life. Chapter four provides the critical topics to be covered on the journey to the Modern-Day Princess ceremony (which can be completed one on one with your own daughter, with a mentor, or in a small group environment). The program can be completed over a weekend or during once a month meetings; whatever works for your circumstances. You are even provided numerous worksheet resources mentioned in the book that can be copied and used just as they are. Chapter five provides fabulous advice for moms; to include traits all mothers should strive to perfect in their own lives, to serve as role models for their daughters. The authors remind mothers of the importance of Godly mentors to assist in moving young women forward in their life journey. Chapter six focuses on the role of a mentor-every aspect of mentoring was covered-how to choose a mentor as well as the qualities of serving as one. Chapter seven goes into detail on the Modern-Day Princess ceremony. Not one detail was over-looked; even providing options for individuals or groups, reminding us that it's the thought that counts-NOT the cost. Chapter eight covers the important role a man's blessing plays in the ceremony, as well as in God's plan; all the way back in time to the Old Testament. The Dad, or father figure, will be called to proclaim a blessing over his Princess-which will produce intense spiritual growth for years afterward. Several blessing samples are provided to inspire the man/men in your ceremony. Chapter nine provides additional resource information and encouragement to get started! The authors remind us of the positive outcome for everyone involved: women, men, moms, girls, communities, families, leaders, school teachers and finally-that God anoints it! You MUST get this book and start mentoring to a young lady today! Young women NEED this program-and we have been called to lead it! Absolutely every detail of the ceremony is provided, so you don't have to create anything (or be afraid to get started!). This book is an outstanding resource, and motivated me to implement the program THIS Fall!
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jubileeJR More than 1 year ago
I have to say that reading this book has spurred me on to be more deliberate in making memories for my kids, and my daughter in particular. And to remind her of past events that she is too young to remember. And now, after reading this book, I have many ideas and strategies to keep that practice going. Doreen and Pam have hearts for young women and it shows in their writing and creative ideas to help make girls feel special and a princess of the King. The authors' idea of building up young women through mentoring is Biblical - a practice that must be deliberate, thoughtful and bathed in prayer. We cannot just hope for it to happen. And crowning that mentoring journey (if I may be so bold as to use that phrase) is a special party honoring your princess. This party is akin to a sweet sixteen party or a debutante party, but families can create a party that fits within their budget and comfort zone. The important part is taking the time to honor and challenge the young lady to live a life of a daughter of the King. Which the mentoring process (before the party) focuses upon. These ideas can be adapted to Non-Christian situations. Pam and Doreen show how civic and other community groups can facilitate these parties also.
Ellybean More than 1 year ago
The book Raising a Modern-Day Princess by authors Pam Farrel and Doreen Hanna has moved me and it's entirely changed my way of thinking in how to raise my own daughter as well as taught me how to influence the young woman around me. Grace, dignity, inner beauty, and self worth, traits every daughter of the King should have instilled into her life. Often enough no one is taking the time to celebrate daughter's journey into becoming the woman God has created them to be. It's not hard at at all to do this, in fact Raising a Modern-Day Princess suggest many types of rite of passage celebrations both big and small that can change and impact a girls life forever. The examples of personal testimony of mothers, fathers, and daughters that took part in this are ever so moving. Not often is it that a book speaks such revelations that tugged at my heart strings and left me in tears. I encourage every sister as well as brothers in Christ to pick up this book and read it. I promise you, if you take the advice of this book, whom ever God has laid on your heart will feel purpose, value, and strength in moving forward and following the path God has laid in front of them. This book is on the top favorite reads for 2010 and ten for me, and I am quite honored and blessed by those that contributed in writing these words of truth. If I could, I would personally give everyone I know a copy of Raising a Modern-Day Princess. I give this book 5 out of 5 stars. ***Special thanks to Christy Wong of Tyndale House Publishers for sending me a review copy.***
Wyn More than 1 year ago
This book has some very interesting ideas about parenting teenage girls. Whether you believe in the authors' ideas or not, it is a book well worth reading. They provide good examples of what other societies consider as rites of passage and the influence of fathers and mothers on their children and how the good parts of these rites can be incorporated into your own life. They use sound biblical examples of what is expected of fathers and mothers in their parenting obligations and how the commission of these tasks influence the teen in her current life as well as in the future. I especially liked the chapter on how words themselves can really impact a girl and stick with her into her adult life. The book was easy to read and had many thoughtful insights and ideas.
Novel_Teen_Book_Reviews More than 1 year ago
Most girls dream of living out their own fairy-tale romance. They are bombarded from childhood with stories of beautiful princesses swept off their feet by a handsome, noble prince. It's a beautiful dream, but without practical, life-changing mentoring, girls are often disillusioned when their first love disappoints. Some girls fall into a pattern of giving their heart to the wrong guy. And those of us who've been hurt know there is no Band-Aid for a broken heart. Here is a practical book filled with ideas and stories of what other moms and mentors have done to come alongside young women and affirm their self-confidence, beauty, and value. The authors share the importance of mentoring and coming-of-age ceremonies that teach girls who they are and how to recognize a handsome, noble prince beyond his outward appearance. Readers are encouraged to seize the challenge of imparting wisdom to the girls in their life. If we don't do it, someone else will or our girls will be left to face the world on their own. I highly recommend this book to anyone who has young girls in their life. God calls us to train a child in the way that they should go, but many adults skip the "relationship stuff" as being too awkward to talk about. This "relationship stuff" is one of the most important teachings teenagers need, crave. Who better than to teach it that the loving adults in their life? Having served in youth ministry for eleven years, I've seen heartbreaking things. But almost more heartbreaking that a girl's broken heart is the fact that her parents neglected the challenge to teach her the truth. Parents, we can't control the choices our children make, but we are called by God to give them the tools and knowledge to make the right choice. The world is teaching them every day. Get this book for your daughters and get Raising a Modern-Day Knight for your sons. Affirm your children as they journey into adulthood.
MarineCorpsNomads More than 1 year ago
Raising a Modern Day Princess introduced a good number of ideas that I hadn't considered prior to reading this book. I like the idea of the rite of passage type ceremony for a girl. It helped me think about ways to make my daughter's journey into womanhood special and memorable for her. The ideas for having the father be active in the rite of passage ceremony as he affirms his daughter's worth were wonderful. I appreciated the encouragement to mothers as we seek to make sure our daughters know their worth in the sight of God, their Heavenly Father. One thing that I had a difficult time with was the importance placed on outside mentors. Maybe, because my daughter is only 10, I am a little naive, but I feel that the Christian mother should be the main mentor in the daughter's life. We, as parents, are given the responsibility of raising our child(ren). Since we will be held accountable for our actions, I believe that we should be the ones mentoring our children. That is not to say there isn't a place for outside mentors, but I don't put as great of an importance on them as the authors of the book do (at least in a solid Christian home). Even though I didn't agree with everything in the book, I liked the ideas and concepts in this book and would recommend it to others. Disclosure: I received the book from Tyndale House Publishers for the purpose of writing a review on my blog. No other compensation was received. All opinions are my own.