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Real Love

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Overview


With Real Love, nothing else matters; without it, nothing else is enough.

Why do most people spend their whole lives searching for loving and happy relationships but rarely find them? What is the ?secret something? that all relationships need in order to thrive? Dr. Greg Baer found the answers to these questions while working with hundreds of individuals and couples. In Real Love, he shares his enlightening and practical blueprint for creating successful relationships and ...

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Real Love

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Overview


With Real Love, nothing else matters; without it, nothing else is enough.

Why do most people spend their whole lives searching for loving and happy relationships but rarely find them? What is the “secret something” that all relationships need in order to thrive? Dr. Greg Baer found the answers to these questions while working with hundreds of individuals and couples. In Real Love, he shares his enlightening and practical blueprint for creating successful relationships and reveals the secret to finding and keeping what he calls “Real Love.”

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781592400478
  • Publisher: Penguin Group (USA) Incorporated
  • Publication date: 1/19/2004
  • Edition description: Reprint
  • Pages: 288
  • Sales rank: 223,872
  • Product dimensions: 5.40 (w) x 10.88 (h) x 0.76 (d)

Meet the Author


Greg Baer, M.D. is the author of REAL LOVE and founder of The Real Love Institute. An expert on the subjects of anger elimination, relationships, dating, love, marriage, parenting, and workplace conflict resolution, he conducts seminars and workshops around the country.
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Table of Contents

Acknowledgments ix
Introduction xi
1 The Missing Ingredient: What Relationships Really Need 1
The Missing Ingredient
Real Love and Genuine Happiness
The Destructive Legacy of Conditional Love
Drowning for Lack of Love
2 Getting and Protecting: The Many Faces of Imitation Love 18
The Many Faces of Imitation Love
The Cost of Imitation Love
Getting and Protecting Behaviors
Getting and Protecting (Why Do We Do That?)
I Love You Because...
Making Choices
Changing Our Choices
3 Being Seen and Getting Loved: The Tale of the Wart King and the Wise Man 41
The Tale of the Wart King and the Wise Man
How to Recognize and Find Real Love: Truth to Senn to Accepted to Loved
The Truth About Relationships and Individual Choices
The Difference Between Asking and Expecting
4 Taking the Leap of Faith: Everyday Wise Men and How to Find Them 63
Remember the Wart King
Being Patient: Don't Expect Brass Bands
Having a Desire to Change
Exercising Faith
Telling the Truth About Yourself
Giving Up the Getting and Protecting Behaviors
5 The Effect of Real Love: Like Money in the Bank 117
Real Love Is Like Money in the Bank
The Effect of Real Love on the Past and the Present
Real Love: The Answer to All Our Relationship "Problems"
The Need for Consistent Real Love
Magnifying the Effect of Real Love with Gratitude
6 Sharing Your Fortune: The Power of Loving Others 136
Loved: We Can't Give What We Don't Have
Seeing: The Elimination of Our Own Blindness
Accepting: The Natural, Peaceful Result of Seeing
Loving: Caring About the Happiness of Other People
7 Playing a Beautiful Duet: The Joys of Mutually Loving Relationships 170
Telling the Truth About Ourselves
Telling the Truth About Our Partner
Telling the Truth All the Time
Making Requests
Working Things Out
Faith in Mutual Love
Becoming One
8 Real Love in All Our Relationships: Spouses, Children, Friends, and Co-workers 188
The Truth About Marriage
Exclusive Relationships
Sex in Relationships
The Truth About Parenting
Family, Friends, Co-workers, and Everyone Else
Our Relationship with God
9 Dealing With Obstacles on the Path to Real Love: Disappointment, Anger, and Getting and Protecting Behaviors 227
Eliminating Conflict
Dealing with Getting and Protecting Behaviors
Ending a Relationship (Including Divorce)
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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4.5
( 26 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(21)

4 Star

(2)

3 Star

(1)

2 Star

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1 Star

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 28 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 12, 2009

    This increased my overall happiness 100%

    As my husband would say, it was like I couldn't see and then someone gave me a pair of glasses. I've spent my entire life in the self help section. I could throw them all away because what I really needed was Real Love!! I have more peace in all of my relationships than I ever thought possible.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted April 6, 2014

    Maggie to emilee

    Just dont emilee. This is crazy. Lets just go back to camp.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted April 6, 2014

    Faolon

    Comon let gets bavk to camp

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted April 6, 2014

    Kevin

    Walk in with his 15 inch Di<_>ck can i jion

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted April 6, 2014

    Emilee

    Looks at faolon

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 5, 2013

    This book's message changed how I live my life! Recognizing tha

    This book's message changed how I live my life! Recognizing that I have choices, and which choices will help me live a happier life, has been enormous. Also, there is a lot of free support available, e.g. conference calls (listed on the Real Love website).

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted October 18, 2011

    Excellent

    This book explains why people are so defensive. Essentially most people are walking around empty and feeling unloved. When they don't feel loved, they take offense at the slightest remark. They also are self-centered and focused on getting their needs met. They can't focus on their partner's needs and wishes. Baer explains how we need other people outside of our relationship (friends, family, church, etc) to help us feel loved. Then we can think about our partners needs bc we're not empty. Basically, expecting our partner to fulfill our needs and make us happy never works. We each need to learn self-love by being loved by others, then we can love our partner. Very well-written. If you are having marital problems, definitely get this book.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 13, 2010

    I could hardly make it through

    Although I had to for a book club and I deeply resented it. What a terrible understand of how to write an effective self improvement book.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted November 11, 2009

    Real Love!! Really good!

    Absolutely beautiful book... everyone should read this book... and not only once..!

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  • Posted May 13, 2009

    BEST BOOK I'VE EVER READ!!!

    Another person rated this book saying they had spent their life in the self help section of the bookstore and upon finding this book they can now throw all those books away. That is EXACTLY how I feel! The book(s) are changing my life! I have become a different woman, a better woman and I thank my lucky stars daily for having come across this book. Do yourself a favor and read it. What do you have to lose? I also really like the "Real Love in Marriage" and the workbook that goes along with it. Life changing, I promise! My marriage is night and day from just a month ago. www.Reallove.com (pay it a visit, you won't regret it!)

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted February 12, 2009

    Read This Book

    I read this book after I was already separated from my now ex-husband. It came too late to save a marriage but absolutely taught me how to get a divorce with grace and love. The principles are easy to understand and not always so easy to live because they require a shift in consciousness. I rather equated it to being hit in the head with a bat. If you want a book that can change your life, this is the one.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted February 11, 2009

    I Also Recommend:

    Real Love is a Must Read for Anyone and Everyone

    Reading the Real Love series has been changing my life and my family since we began reading the Real Love books 4 months ago. It is just amazing to see the personal progress my spouse, my son and I have been making. Real love has been like a subtle current moving through our family creating more loving and harmonious relationships between us. Real Love has been clearing up problems and behaviors we've struggled with for years when nothing else has worked. I just couldn't be more grateful for this book, Greg Baer (the author) and the other Real Love books in his series. I truly believe that if you read, learn and practice Real Love your life and the lives of those around you will inevitably change.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted November 10, 2007

    A reviewer

    I heard about this book from a friend a year ago...It has changed my life and the way I see myself and other people. 'Real Love' with out it nothing else matters!

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted June 14, 2007

    If your having relationship problems this book really helps!

    This is a really good book! I read the first page and couldnt put it down. this was the best book for me to read.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 4, 2005

    exceptional!

    The book is well written, easy to read & understand. I've heard Greg in person at a training class and his book closely follows what he talks about. His 'concepts' make sense and can be employed in daily life. Hopefully B&N will get his other books that accompany this first book.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 18, 2004

    Read it

    I went to one of Greg's seminars and enjoyed it thoroughly. He is as great in his books as he is in person.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 30, 2003

    Insightful and Life-Changing

    Invariably, most relationship books suggest ways of "fixing" the problems that arise as we interact with those around us. Rather than offer an emotional aspirin for these problems, this book explores the causes of our conflicts and shows us how to completely change our lives. The lack of what Dr. Baer calls "Real Love" is the cause of all our unhappiness and the root of our problems in relationships. I was astounded by the principles in this book. It really is unlike anything else out there on relationships. I read another book by Greg Baer a couple years ago and it truly has changed my life. Once I saw what I was lacking in my life, I was able to get the "Real Love" that I really needed and it has truly made me a happier person.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 30, 2003

    THIS BOOK CHANGED OUR LIVES!!!

    My husband and I have read both of Dr. Baer's books "Real Love" and "The Wise Man". Both have enabled us to make life changing decisions regarding our marriage and our relationships with family and friends. We now "see" the world through different eyes. Where there was once constant fear and anger there is now Real Love and concern for each others happiness. It has become our life's handbook.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 31, 2003

    An absolute Gem

    Exquisitely simple and beautiful !! That's the best way I can describe this book. I feel like the author was "in my head" and writing the book just for me. Never could I have imagined that the difficult topics of "love and relationships" could be explained so clearly, lucidly and concisely. I have often had conversations with friends, family members and people in the "helping fields" about what exactly "love" is and how can I successfully apply it in the relationships that count the most. I found my answers here. Dr. Baer not only defines what "real love" is, but just as importantly, he defines what it isn't. He refers to these "counterfeits" as "imitation love" and I find great relief in knowing that I don't have to chase after these forms of "fool's gold" anymore. He then lays the blueprint as to precisely how we go about finding the genuine acceptance and love we all crave. I know that this book will give people the answers they need and will serve to heal a lot of heartache. This book is a treasure.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 31, 2003

    "Doctor Love" Finds The Perfect Prescription

    Dr. Baer has written the definitive book on relationships and the pathway to finding real love. I highly recommend his new book to individuals or couples seeking the true meaning of life.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 28 Customer Reviews

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