Really, You've Done Enough: A Parents? Guide to Stop Parenting Their Adult Child Who Still Needs Their Money But Not Their Advice

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Congratulations! You, as a parent, have managed to produce and raise a child who has made it into young adulthood. Now please, back off. Farther, farther ...

Your child needs the freedom to really find themselves and their place in the world and learn that their parents are just people ... flawed people who made terrible mistakes ...

Wait, no, that's too far. ?A little closer ... there.

Does your wallet feel a...

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Overview

Congratulations! You, as a parent, have managed to produce and raise a child who has made it into young adulthood. Now please, back off. Farther, farther ...

Your child needs the freedom to really find themselves and their place in the world and learn that their parents are just people ... flawed people who made terrible mistakes ...

Wait, no, that's too far. ?A little closer ... there.

Does your wallet feel a bit lighter? Good. ?That's the first lesson. Your child needs freedom and space, but most of all, they need your money, and you should give it to them because above all you are a good parent. ?And you'll need someone to visit you in the nursing home.

In addition to explaining why you should joyfully give your child all of your hard-earned cash, this book will also explain the nuances of communicating with your child. For example, do not e-mail your child that your family dog has died. Oh, and never have sex, nor utter the word. Ever.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781582974781
  • Publisher: F+W Media
  • Publication date: 10/3/2007
  • Pages: 192
  • Product dimensions: 5.00 (w) x 7.90 (h) x 0.70 (d)

Meet the Author

Sarah Walker's humorous writings have been published at McSweeney's Internet Tendency and Opium Magazine. Currently she works at The Daily Show with Jon Stewart following previous stints at Late Night with Conan O'Brien and The Late Show with David Letterman. One of her short films, "Surviving Geddes," about the psychological impact on two grown woman who worked as models with the renowned baby photographer Anne Geddes, was shown in New York at the IFC's Newsfakers/Filmmakers charity film festival, sponsored by the McSweeney's tutoring center, 826NYC, in conjunction with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. She is also one half of the sketch duo, Walker and Cantrell (www.walkerandcantrell.com), who perform a weekly sketch comedy show at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre in New York City.

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Table of Contents


Introduction: You Fuck Them Up     1
Then and Now: Your Twenties vs. Your Child's Twenties     8
Living at Home: The Good Old Days...Today!     14
A Message from the Author     21
Acceptable Childhood Myths to Still Insist Are True to Your Adult Child     24
Unemployment: Motorcycle Gangs and Nobel Prizes     29
Unemployment: Creative Child vs. Uncreative Child     35
Your Child's First Job: Take a Picture on Their First Day and Make an Ornament Out of It     39
Helping Your Child Get a Job: Only Bitter People Hate Nepotism     43
A Memo from Linda Walker: Mother to Sarah Walker, and Non-crarent     48
The Gift of Technology: Helping Your Child Through Their Stay-at-Home Twenties     56
Partying with Your Child: The Party's Over Before It's Begun     69
Let's Keep it in the Family: Partying With Your Child's Friends     77
Religion     87
Holidays: Eww     88
Jesus in His Twenties: The Lost Years, Revealed!     96
Birthdays: A Time to Give     100
A Message from the Author     108
Roadtrip!: Probably Less Exciting Than the Film of the Same Name     109
International Travel: Ole!     116
Sex: I've Said Too Much Already     118
Something for the Kids: Sex in the Parental Home     126
Parental Visit: A Glorious Forty-Eight Hours. And No More     129
Middle-of-the-Book Survey     136
Sibling Rivalry: One Child Is Probably More Talented Than the Other     138
Prison Perspectives with John Walker     141
Family Reunion: Double the Family, Double the...Not Fun     143
Divorce: You've Really Outdone Yourself This Time     146
Death: Please Don't Make It Suck Even More     157
Comparisons and Competition: Your Child's Great As They Are - Unless They Aren't     168
A Message from the Author     172
Guilt: Feel Bad for Writing This Chapter     176
Therapy: Stop Talking About It, Crazy     180
Significant Others: The Possibility That Your Child Will Not Die Alone-Unless You Somehow Screw It Up     185
A Message from the Author     197
Rehearsal Dinner: Par...ty?     199
Wedding: It's Official. Your Child Will Not Die Alone. Unless They Divorce or Their Spouse Dies First, But You Know What I Mean     207
Pregnancy: Eegs!     212
So You're a Celebrity: Don't Read This If You're Not a Celebrity     215
Now Let's All Cry Together     222
A Message from the Author      224
End-of-the-Book Survey     226
About the Author     228
Acknowledgments     228
The TOW Books Story     230
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