Secrets of Happily Married Men: Eight Ways to Win Your Wife's Heart Forever

( 6 )

Overview


About the Author:
Dr. Scott Haltzman is clinical assistant professor of psychiatry and human behavior at Brown University, and medical director of NRI Community Services in Rhode Island

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Overview


About the Author:
Dr. Scott Haltzman is clinical assistant professor of psychiatry and human behavior at Brown University, and medical director of NRI Community Services in Rhode Island

Read More Show Less

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
Haltzman begins this marriage guide for men by emphasizing the biological differences between men and women, arguing that traditional approaches to marriage counseling can devalue men and ignore immutable male qualities. Evolutionary biology along with explanations of the limbic system governing emotions provide the foundation for Haltzman's argument that much psychological dogma is possibly wrong, buoying married men by suggesting that it might be healthy "to keep your feelings to yourself" or that getting in touch with feelings is not a panacea for a better marriage. Then Haltzman, a psychiatry professor at Brown and operator of a Web site devoted to the "secrets of married men," launches his eight strategies with remarkable vigor. Despite the author's unorthodox theoretical groundwork, the strategies are commonsensical-make marriage your job, learn to listen, know your wife, aim to please. More important, they are extraordinarily well fleshed out and convincingly supported with useful "to do" lists and a multitude of examples. They will no doubt prove helpful to many men struggling to build a happy marriage. (Jan.) Copyright 2005 Reed Business Information.
Library Journal
Asserting that men have the power to fix their broken marriages because they are men, psychiatrist and marriage counselor Haltzman put together a guidebook that helps men give their wives exactly what they want and receive from them exactly what they hoped for the day they got married. Drawing on years of clinical experience and responses on his web site (secretsofmarriedmen.com), the author cites several "secrets" that differentiate the happily from the unhappily married men. Those who are satisfied have learned to listen to and know their wives; they aim to please and expect conflict and have learned to deal with it. Haltzman writes guy to guy, with anecdotes and humor. While it may be a challenge to get men to check out this book, it is highly recommended for all libraries. Copyright 2005 Reed Business Information.
From the Publisher
Haltzman begins this marriage guide for men by emphasizing the biological differences between men and women, arguing that traditional approaches to marriage counseling can devalue men and ignore immutable male qualities. Evolutionary biology along with explanations of the limbic system governing emotions provide the foundation for Haltzman's argument that much psychological dogma is possibly wrong, buoying married men by suggesting that it might be healthy "to keep your feelings to yourself" or that getting in touch with feelings is not a panacea for a better marriage. Then Haltzman, a psychiatry professor at Brown and operator of a Web site devoted to the "secrets of married men," launches his eight strategies with remarkable vigor. Despite the author's unorthodox theoretical groundwork, the strategies are commonsensical—make marriage your job, learn to listen, know your wife, aim to please. More important, they are extraordinarily well fleshed out and convincingly supported with useful "to do" lists and a multitude of examples. They will no doubt prove helpful to many men struggling to build a happy marriage. (Jan.) (Publishers Weekly, November 7, 2005)

Asserting that men have the power to fix their broken marriages because they are men, psychiatrist and marriage counselor Haltzman put together a guidebook that helps men give their wives exactly what they want and receive from them exactly what they hoped for the day they got married. Drawing on years of clinical experience and responses on his web site (secretsofmarriedmen.com), the author cites several "secrets" that differentiate the happily from the unhappily married men. Those who are satisfied have learned to listen to and know their wives; they aim to please and expect conflict and have learned to deal with it. Haltzman writes guy to guy, with anecdotes and humor. While it may be a challenge to get men to check out this book, it is highly recommended for all libraries. (Library Journal)

MANLY MEN REST assured: You can hope to become a better husband without having to get in touch with your feminine side. Psychiatrist Haltzman doesn't ask men to change so much as to harness their best masculine strengths. Lively and entertaining, this broad guidebook provides Haltzman's insights illuminated by anecdotes from his online discussion forum for married men. The upshot: Men would do well to approach their marriages with the same commitment and sense of purpose that they bring to a job. (Psychology Today)

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780787994143
  • Publisher: Wiley
  • Publication date: 1/2/2007
  • Edition number: 1
  • Pages: 288
  • Sales rank: 361,780
  • Product dimensions: 5.60 (w) x 8.60 (h) x 2.80 (d)

Table of Contents

1 You've got male 9
2 Beware of marriage counseling 29
3 The first way : make your marriage your job 55
4 The second way : know your wife 79
5 The third way : be home now 97
6 The fourth way : expect conflict and deal with it 125
7 The fifth way : learn to listen 163
8 The sixth way : aim to please 187
9 The seventh way : understand the truth about sex 205
10 The eighth way : introduce yourself 229
Epilogue : celebrate your love 257
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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4.5
( 6 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 6 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted August 13, 2006

    More than meets the eye

    This book deserves five stars because it delivers. Yes, the advice within will help any man improve his marriage. It also has value not intended by the authors. If I wanted a young man considering marriage to understand what's involved, I would urge him to read this book, to realize how high the expectations of women have become. Many men might be better off opting for less demanding relationships such as keeping things at a serious dating level or living together without the expectations marriage seems to bring. There are areas of this book that will make single men (and some women) cringe at the loss of independence involved in marriage. Better to cringe before than after the deal is done. Women should not read this book. It can only encourage expectations few are likely to have realized.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted December 15, 2011

    Highly Recommended - you must check it out!!

    I recommend this book for every man who is in a relationship or if you have just gotten married.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 14, 2007

    A book for everyone

    As a marriage therapist I delayed writing this review until I had not only enjoyed it myself but also recommended it to a number of couples. I get very positive responses from individuals and couples who use Haltzman's very readable book. His approach of using the skills men already possess to enhance their relationship hits the right cord for the guys. The practical approaches that he recommends provide direction that couples really understand and implement.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 13, 2006

    SHOULD BE REQUIRED READING FOR ALL MARRIED MEN

    'MEN ARE SUCH JERKS!' How many times have you heard that, sometimes even from other men? Scott Haltzman doesn't think we're all jerks. In an unusually wise and frequently funny book, he urges us to use the skills that make us successful in work and sports to become, in effect, world-class husbands who, in return for our efforts, have a much improved chance of being appreciated, maybe even cherished, by our wives. I'm in the marriage education field and (full disclosure) know Scott Haltzman personally. Since around 70% of divorces are now being initiated by disaffected wives with their husbands frequently not knowing what hit them, this book is an extremely effective antidote to male obliviousness. Any man who reads this book will know what to do to avoid being blind-sided by his wife's abrupt announcement and departure. Of course, knowing what to do is one thing. Heeding the sage advice and actually doing it is quite another. A book can only do so much, but this one does a lot. The big question is: since women buy and read most of the marriage self-help books, how will this gold mine of information get into the hands (and heads) of the legions of husbands who badly need it? It's too bad women couldn't administer the book to their husbands intravenously, but maybe as a gift. With a 43% divorce rate for first marriages (60% for second marriages), marriage is clearly a beleagured institution. By working the male side of the street, Haltzman has made a major contribution to our understanding of how we husbands can use our male competence to properly attend to the care and feeding of our precious marriage.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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    Posted March 21, 2014

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    Posted February 10, 2011

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Sort by: Showing all of 6 Customer Reviews

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