Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference

by Shaunti Feldhahn, Dr. Michael Sytsma

Overview

"I highly recommend this insightful book to all married couples."—GARY CHAPMAN, PhD, author of The 5 Love Languages

Let's Talk about Sex

Most people are curious about sex and would love a few answers. "Are we normal?" "Why isn't my spouse as interested in sex as I am?" "I don't want to feel pressured, but don't want to disappoint my spouse either—what do I do?" "How do we handle the impact of medication, menopause, porn, ED, pain . . . ?"

Most importantly: "How can we get on the same page and create a thriving intimate life?"

Sex is one of the most common marriage issues (for example, almost 80% of couples are mismatched in how often they want it), but it doesn't have to be that way.

Relationship researcher Shaunti Feldhahn and renowned sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma have identified eight simple, transformational factors to help you move from disconnection to delight. This is knowledge you can trust, based on vast clinical experience and their breakthrough research, including the largest nationally representative study ever conducted with married couples about sex. This book is not a "sex manual"; it is a fascinating, practical field guide that will help you intimately understand your spouse and create the marriage you've always wanted.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780764239557
Publisher:	Baker Publishing Group
Publication date:	02/07/2023
Pages:	256
Sales rank:	150,509
Product dimensions:	5.10(w) x 7.10(h) x 0.90(d)

About the Author

Shaunti Feldhahn is a bestselling author, social researcher, speaker, and podcaster. With a graduate degree from Harvard, Shaunti uses her analytical background to help relationships thrive. She and her husband, Jeff, have coauthored groundbreaking relationship books with nearly 3 million copies sold. Learn more at shaunti.com.

Dr. Michael Sytsma is a licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, ordained minister, professor, and national speaker. With over 30 years of clinical experience in sex therapy, he founded Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. and co-founded Sexual Wholeness, Inc. Learn more at intimatemarriage.org.

Editorial Reviews

01/09/2023

In this accessible outing, social researcher Feldhahn (For Women Only) and pastor and sex therapist Sytsma offer sex advice for married couples. In 2020, the authors kicked off the Marriage Intimacy Project, a study that collected data from 5,300 participants with the goal of finding the most significant factors for maintaining intimacy in marriage. The results showed the benefits of having a “transformative understanding” of one’s spouse, or being able to use misunderstandings as a way to learn about a relationship. The authors tackle desire, explaining that what might feel like sexual rejection (“Why doesn’t my spouse want me?”) can come down to differences in desire types, and they recommend embracing these differences and brainstorming solutions, like scheduling sex if necessary. Elsewhere, they debunk ideas of a prescribed sexual “standard” in marriage—each couple’s “normal” is unique, and it’s important to keep lines of communication open and work as a team to improve intimacy. Though the insights aren’t groundbreaking, readers will appreciate the authors’ conversational tone and easy-to-implement advice. Couples looking to strengthen their intimacy will find this a good place to start. (Feb.)

Publishers Weekly