Self-Esteem: A Proven Program of Cognitive Techniques for Assessing, Improving, and Maintaining Your Self-Esteem

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Overview

Do you wake up dreading the day?

Do you feel ciscouraged with what you've accomplished in life?

Do you want greater self-esteem, productivity, and joy in daily living?

If so, you will benefit from this revolutionary way of brightening your moods without drugs or lengthy therapy. All you need is your own common sense and the easy-to-follow methods revealed in this book by one ...

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Self-Esteem

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Overview

Do you wake up dreading the day?

Do you feel ciscouraged with what you've accomplished in life?

Do you want greater self-esteem, productivity, and joy in daily living?

If so, you will benefit from this revolutionary way of brightening your moods without drugs or lengthy therapy. All you need is your own common sense and the easy-to-follow methods revealed in this book by one of the country's foremost authorities on mood and personal relationship problems.

In Ten Days to Self-esteem, Dr. David Burns presents innovative, clear, and compassionate methods that will help you identify the causes of your mood slumps and develop a more positive outlook on life. You will learn that

You feel the way you think: Negative feelings like guilt, anger, and depression do not result from the bad things that happen to you, but from the way you think about these events. This simple but revolutionary idea can change your life!

You can change the way you feel: You will discover why you get depressed and learn how to brighten your outlook when you're in a slump.

You can enjoy greater happiness, productivity, and intimacy — without drugs or lengthy therapy.

Can a self-help book do all this? Studies show that two thirds of depressed readers of Dr. Burns's classic bestseller, Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy, experienced dramatic felief in just four weeks without psychotherapy or antidepressant medications. Three-year follow-up studies revealed that readers did not relapse but continued to enjoy their positive outlook. Ten Days to Self-esteem offers a powerful new tool that provides hope and healing in ten easy steps. The methods are based on common sense and are not difficult to apply. Research shows that they really work!

Feeling good feels wonderful. You owe it to yourself to feel good!

Self-Esteem is the ultimate self-help book--the only book that fully deals with the one most important element to building true happiness and success: positive self-esteem. It provides breakthrough insights and a wealth of simple, fun exercises that will radically improve the way readers feel about themselves.

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What People Are Saying

Phillip G. Zimbardo
A valuable storehouse of tactics and strategies for constructing (or renovating) the foundation of our self-esteem.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780061744143
  • Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
  • Publication date: 10/28/2008
  • Format: MP3
  • Edition description: Abridged
  • Sales rank: 537,889
  • Ships to U.S.and APO/FPO addresses only.

Meet the Author

Matthew McKay, Ph.D., is clinical director of Haight Ashbury Psychological Services in San Francisco, CA, and a professor at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, CA. He is coauthor of The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook, Thoughts and Feelings, Self-Esteem, and other titles. His books combined have sold more than 2 million copies. McKay received his Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology. In private practice, he specializes in the cognitive behavioral treatment of anxiety, anger, and depression.

Patrick Fanning is a professional writer in the mental health field and the founder of a men's support group in Northern California. He is the coauthor of eight self-help books, including Messages, The Messages Workbook, Self-Esteem, Thoughts and Feelings, and Couple Skills.

Patrick Fanning is a professional writer in the mental health field and the founder of a men's support group in Northern California. He is the coauthor of eight self-help books, including Messages, The Messages Workbook, Self-Esteem, Thoughts and Feelings, and Couple Skills.

Patrick Fanning is a professional writer in the mental health field and the founder of a men's support group in Northern California. He is the coauthor of eight self-help books, including Messages, The Messages Workbook, Self-Esteem, Thoughts and Feelings, and Couple Skills.

Patrick Fanning is a professional writer in the mental health field and the founder of a men's support group in Northern California. He is the coauthor of eight self-help books, including Messages, The Messages Workbook, Self-Esteem, Thoughts and Feelings, and Couple Skills.

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Table of Contents

Chapter 1 The Nature of Self-Esteem 1
Causes and Effects
How To Use This Book
For the Therapist
Chapter 2 The Pathological Critic 15
An Arsenal of Shoulds
The Origin of the Critic
Why You Listen to the Critic
The Role of Reinforcement
How the Critic Gets Reinforced
Catching Your Critic
Chapter 3 Disarming the Critic 33
Unmasking His Purpose
Talking Back
Making Your Critic Useless
Summary Chart
Chapter 4 Accurate Self-Assessment 45
Self-Concept Inventory
Listing Your Weaknesses
Listing Your Strengths
A New Self-Description
Celebrate Your Strengths
Chapter 5 Cognitive Distortions 61
The Distortions
Combating Distortions
Chapter 6 Compassion 89
Compassion Defined
Toward a Compassionate Mind
The Problem of Worth
Compassion for Others
Exercises
Chapter 7 The Shoulds 107
How Values Are Formed
The Tyranny of the Shoulds
Healthy Versus Unhealthy Values
How Shoulds Affect Your Self-Esteem
Discovering Your Shoulds
Challenging and Revising Your Shoulds
Cutting Off the Should
Atonement--When Shoulds Make Sense
Chapter 8 Handling Mistakes 133
Reframing Mistakes
The Problem of Awareness
Raising Your Mistake Consciousness
Chapter 9 Responding to Criticism 147
The Myth of Reality
Responding to Criticism
Putting It All Together
Chapter 10 Asking for What You Want 173
Your Legitimate Needs
Needs Versus Wants
Wants Inventory
Wants into Words
Whole Messages
Chapter 11 Goal Setting and Planning 187
What Do You Want?
Selecting Goals to Work On: The First Cut
Selecting Goals to Work On: The Evaluation
Making Your Goals Specific
Making a Commitment
Blocks to Achieving Goals
Chapter 12 Visualization 209
Why Visualization Works
Visualization Exercises
Rules for Creating Effective Self-Esteem Visualizations
Self-Esteem Sessions
Special Considerations
Chapter 13 Hypnosis for Self-Acceptance 231
Why Hypnosis?
What Is Hypnosis?
Elements of the Self-Esteem Induction
Recording Your Induction
The Self-Esteem Induction
Listening to Your Induction
Chapter 14 I'M Still Not OK 247
A Special Vulnerability
Protecting Against the Pain
Facing the Pain
The Option of Therapy
Chapter 15 Core Beliefs 265
Identifying Core Beliefs
New Core Beliefs
Chapter 16 Building Self-Esteem in Children 279
The Power of Parents
Parents as Mirrors
Look at Your Child
Listening
The Language of Self-Esteem
Discipline
Autonomy
Modeling Self-Esteem
Bibliography 315
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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 32 )
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(12)

4 Star

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3 Star

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 32 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 4, 2008

    I Also Recommend:

    Read Self-Esteem- It's Worth It

    Who's the book for? Anyone who wants to improve their self-esteem. <BR/><BR/>What's the goal of the book? To improve your self-esteem. <BR/><BR/>How does it do this? By showing you how to disarm your "inner critic", you know, that negative inner voice that attacks and judges you. Everyone has one, and people with low self-esteem tend to have a more vicious inner critic. <BR/><BR/>Is it easy to read? Yes, the book is laid out well and written in a very friendly tone. The first three chapters cover the most important and universally applicable information. After finishing them, there is a chart for you to look at. It will direct you to the appropriate chapter(s) that deal with your specific problems. Neat! <BR/><BR/>You don't have to read the book cover-to-cover unless you just need general info- but that's what's good about it; you can use the book to fit your individual needs. With over 600,000 copies sold, it must have helped a few people! Good luck!

    13 out of 13 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted September 26, 2003

    This book changed me! The best book I ever bought!

    I'm only 22 years old and I have been to countless doctors and even a hypnotherpist to help me out with the problems I had been dealing with. I finally went to one last pychologist who recommended a herb I should try. I took the herb and it made me feel so much better but I didn't want to be on pills the rest of my life (because I did that in the past already) So I went to the book store looking on a self help book. The first book I happened to pick up was Self-Esteem (like it was calling me) I saw on the cover that it sold over 550,000 copies so I decided to give it a try. I'm glad I did, with in a week I could feel me changing in a more positive way and thinking and feeling better about myself. Midway through I got off the pills and starting using the book alone with the same fantastic results. My advise is that if you want anything in your life: better car,house,friends, boyfriend, girlfriend or even marrage you should work on yourself first thats the only way you would be completely happy is to take care of yourself first. Even if you think you don't have self esteem this book would still change you, along with your thinking process.

    5 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted November 19, 2012

    A Wonderful Look at the Inner Workings of Self Doubt

    I have read three books that have had a deep impact on my views of myself, the strength of my marriage, and the ways in which I keep my clinical depression in check. These books are: Love Is Never Enough, How to Fix Your Marriage Without Talking About it, and Self Esteem. Love is Never Enough deals with cognative therapy and how it can help you to understand where emotional situations come from that would ordinarilly be mundane. How to Fix Your Marriage deals with where the sub-conscious thoughts from which these origins of emotion come from. Self Esteme deals with the conscious level critic we all have to some degree and how that little voice in your head can cause you to see things in the exact wrong light. Self Esteme has been a transforming insight into silencing the critic and moving on with my life in a way that does not create drama where none existed. It has had an amazingly positive impact on my marriage and the overall level of joy I feel on a daily basis. Since reading this book and doing the excersizes within, I am a better person that I was. And it shows.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted June 10, 2004

    The Best Book

    I was just browsing the book store and saw this book. It called out to me and I now do the exercises in each chapter. This book has taught me so much and has opened my eyes to things that I never even realized. I have recommened it to others. Highly effective !!

    2 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted November 9, 2003

    Amazing ...

    I have struggled with my self-esteem for years. I decided that I couldn't keep ruining relationships and friendships because I needed to fix *me*. I went to the book store and saw 'Self-Esteem'. Out of all the other self-esteem books out there, I had no idea if this was any better or worse than the others. I liked that it has techniques and work areas to actually DO the exercises .. and work through your issues. I would recommend this book to anyone who needs help discovering their own self-worth.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 29, 2012

    Contains Truth, but......

    Content -A+ Mechanics - C- Spelling errors, poor punctuation, poor syntax (no pun intended) make it difficult to read. Much seems as if one person dictated, but no one went back through to edit. I find it easier to take a "positon" paper seriously if it is well-written.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 17, 2009

    Revealing! May need help...

    Self Esteem is a self-help book for the "regular" person. It is offered as "do-it-yourself" therapy w/o the therapist, although I really feel a therapist would help a great deal in explaining a lot of the reasons the book offers as to why we have such low opinions of ourselves. I needed to re-read the chapters several times to understand some of the concepts, but then, I am not a therapist or psych major who would be more familiar with the reasoning behind these explanations. This is not a quick fix type of book and involves a lot of time and dedication to be successful in building the readers' self-esteem, let alone the constant practicing of the concepts to ensure the concepts "work" and take hold. I think this book would work best for the reader when done in a program with a therapist.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted December 15, 2008

    more from this reviewer

    An instructive guide on enhancing self-esteem

    Each individual manifests self-esteem, or the lack of it, differently. Generally, people with strong self-esteem had parents who nurtured them constantly during their early childhood, while those with low self-esteem often did not. Can people with low self-esteem build it as adults? Yes, because self-esteem is how you feel about yourself, and your thoughts control your feelings. If you take command of your thoughts, you can take command of your feelings, including your sense of self. In this fine book on self-esteem, Matthew McKay and Patrick Fanning show you how to banish regressive ¿stinking thinking¿ and the nasty inner critic that inevitably tries to flatten your self-esteem. You can use their instructive ¿cognitive techniques¿ to elevate your self-esteem, develop self-assurance and feel better about yourself. getAbstract finds McKay and Fanning¿s book warm and practical. If their self-esteem is high, there¿s a good reason.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted March 28, 2012

    I purchased this but unfortunately it can't be read on iPad or iPhone nook. Wonder if I can get money back.

    I purchased this but unfortunately it can't be read on iPad or iPhone nook. Wonder if I can get money back.

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted July 17, 2009

    GREAT book for those of us who struggle with low self-esteem!

    I just checked this out from the library at my college and the introduction alone got me interested. At 19 y.o. (after years of being weighted down by lack of esteem and a sense of self-worth) I'm so excited to read this book, but I'm going to have to purchase it, seeing that it's due back in less than two weeks.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
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    Posted February 7, 2011

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    Posted December 29, 2010

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    Posted October 20, 2010

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    Posted May 24, 2010

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    Posted January 9, 2010

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    Posted January 15, 2009

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    Posted May 1, 2010

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