Setting Limits With Your Strong-Willed Child: Eliminating Conflict By Establishing Clear, Firm, And Respectful Boundaries

Setting Limits With Your Strong-Willed Child: Eliminating Conflict By Establishing Clear, Firm, And Respectful Boundaries

3.6 36
by Robert J. Mackenzie, Robert J. MacKenzie
     
 

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Now You Can Effectively Parent Your Strong-Willed Child Does your child constantly misbehave and ignore or refuse your requests for proper behavior? Is your relationship with your child based on conflict instead of mutual respect and cooperation? With the help of this groundbreaking book, you can create a positive, respectful, and rewarding relationship with your

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Overview

Now You Can Effectively Parent Your Strong-Willed Child Does your child constantly misbehave and ignore or refuse your requests for proper behavior? Is your relationship with your child based on conflict instead of mutual respect and cooperation? With the help of this groundbreaking book, you can create a positive, respectful, and rewarding relationship with your child. Inside are proven techniques and procedures that provide a refreshing alternative to the ineffective extremes of punishment and permissiveness. Parents and teachers alike will discover how to effectively motivate the strong-willed child and achieve proper conduct.

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From the Publisher
Now You Can Effectively Parent Your Strong-Willed Child

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9780761521365
Publisher:
Crown Publishing Group
Publication date:
01/25/2001
Series:
Setting Limits Series
Pages:
288
Product dimensions:
5.49(w) x 8.45(h) x 0.63(d)

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From the Publisher
Now You Can Effectively Parent Your Strong-Willed Child

Meet the Author

ROBERT J. MACKENZIE, EdD, is an educational psychologist and family therapist who founded the Setting Limits program. He is the author of Setting Limits and Setting Limits with Your Strong-Willed Child.

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Setting Limits With Your Strong-Willed Child 3.7 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 36 reviews.
Guest More than 1 year ago
As a kindergarten teacher as well as a parent of strong-willed 5-year-old twin boys, I too often found myself yelling louder, reminding more often and searching for stricter punishments to get the children to cooperate...Nothing was working! I needed a new approach...and Dr. MacKenzie has given me the understanding and the tools to set limits effectively without losing my sanity. I learned how I was part of 'the dance' of non-compliance and I realized that I would have to change my behavior first before I got a positive change in the behavior from the children. I learned the difference between 'soft limits' and 'firm limits' and the importance of my actions supporting my words; then, the kids began respecting the rules because they knew I would follow through with consequences. It was an eye-opener to realize that by me constantly reminding...I was actually teaching the children to ignore (at least the first few times because they knew more reminding was coming)...by giving unclear open-ended directions...I was actually setting the situation up for clarification, testing and conflict...and by bargaining and making deals out of desperation...I was actually giving the kids the opportunity to control the situation as they decided to up the ante the next time! The best part of this book is the real life examples of exactly what to say and not say to the kids. It is as if the author has been looking in my windows as my twins defy me in so many of the exact same situations. I was immediately comforted by the fact that I am not alone in trying to get compliance instead of defiance from my boys. I also would like to recommend another very helpful A-Z compendium entitled 'The Pocket Parent', a convenient pocket-guide with a very similar philosophy that is exclusively written for parents of normal but often challenging 2- to 5-year-olds. If you have toddlers and preschoolers, it is a great practical companion book to 'Setting Limits' because you can simply turn to the specific challenging behavior of the moment (like hitting, morning crazies, interrupting, bad words, lying, whining, etc.) and get some quick bulleted suggestions to try. You do not have to read 'Pocket Parent' cover to cover...but rather consult each chapter topic as you need it. Both books have great anecdotes and a welcome sense of humor throughout. 'Setting Limits' and 'The Pocket Parent' have helped me get more cooperation at home and at school and are both worthwhile additions to a home or school reference library!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I highly recommend this book for all parents. As a teacher, who was able to effectively control large groups of children in school, I was very surprised to realize that I was struggling so much with my own child. Even though I tried many different strategies, I could not seem to get a handle on my daughter's behavior. Not only did this book give me effective strategies and techniques to use with my daughter, it helped me understand how I was contributing to the problem. This is an excellent book with lots of useful information for all parents, especially those ones dealing with children who have minds of their own.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
It was out of desperation that I bought this book, but I cannot rave enough about it. Setting Limits is clear, helpful, insightful, and instructive. My 3 year old son had me convinced that I was failing and destined to be a very poor parent, even though I felt like I was doing all the "right things." Setting Limits helped me to see that my son was not out to get me, but that I was not only NOT communicating clearly to him what I expected, I was NOT acting consistently with my words. Setting Limits has taught me that it is possible to be clear, firm, and helpful and loving all at the same time. I am so grateful that I found this book.
Kenthree More than 1 year ago
Excellent information for setting clear and consistant boundaries with not just strong willed children but all children. Teachers and parents this book is a must.
orphan71 More than 1 year ago
This book uses very practical common sense style parenting...many of the suggestions I already use with my daughter, but it gives a nice explanation on how to be a great parent...I highly suggest that if you are looking to purchase a book to help with your strong willed child this is the one. I've purchase 4 others and so far I've used this one the most on my twins...it's also a great book just for parenting too.
Guest More than 1 year ago
I've been a teacher, raised 2 kids and I am now raising my grandchild. I'm interested in figuring out how avoid previous mistakes. This book makes me wonder what I was thinking the 1st time around. I finally get it and it tells me 'how to' . I read and reread this one all of the time. It makes common sense that had escaped me. I highly recommend this book.
Guest More than 1 year ago
I can't say enough about this book- we went from embarrasing public power struggles, constant arguing anfd reminding to, 'This is the deal.' My very loving and very strong-willed 3 yr old son now finally takes me seriously. We even had made an appt with a psychologist just to make sure he was normal, but started using the books techniques beforehand- he said it sounds like we're on the right track and to keep up the good work. Now I know how to talk my son's language.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I am surprised this was so highly reviewed. The techniques make sense, and are pretty much what we follow with our six year old anyway. What is almost amusing is so many scenarios end with the kid simply going to his room for time out, problem solved. But that is where my battles start, and why i bought the book. Oh yes, the book does say then you grab them kicking and screaming and carry them off to their rooms, and hold their door closed when they try to get out. But i cant physically handle that with a very strong, tall kid. I totally wasted my money on this one.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Theres a lot of the same story rewritten with different names and slightly different scenerios. For a book telling a parent to be direct it was a very indirect book. I wanted an explanation of how to handle a strong willed child and I got that....with a lot of extra filler. The entire book could be sumed up in a few sentences, maybe even one. Tell your child what you expect when you expect it and follow through on consquences. This may take years to accomplish since your child is collecting behavorial data but will eventually learn what is expected of him....in the mean time, good luck.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This book is good for all parents. It present basics of discipline in an easy to understand format. Great advice that works.
Guest More than 1 year ago
I have two 2 yr olds with very different personalities. My boy is the strong willed one. I loved the new ideas this book gave me to help end the 'dances' he engages us in. It helped us learn how WE were contributing to his behavior as well with how we disciplined. I recommend this book to anyone who has a strong willed child. I wanted to start now while they are young as opposed to many of his examples in the book of parents who waited until their child was 12 to get a handle on the discipline.
Guest More than 1 year ago
My husband and I have read many books but this spelled out for us how to deal with the toughest power struggles and out of control behavior. We have revisited the book often and when we consistently apply the techniques and avoid the 'dance' our son is much easier and our family is calmer and happier.
Guest More than 1 year ago
to raising your spirited/strong-willed child. His ideas are so simple and straightforward that I was amazed I hadn't thought of them myself. My only complaint is that, despite the pictures of toddlers on the cover, really not too much info on the younger set. Glad I bought the book though, and looking forward to applying the ideas!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This books is amazing! My child and I had a terrible relationship a month ago. I was getting frustrated because nothing I was doing would work. He wouldn't listen to anything I asked, would throw tantrums anywhere we would be and his behavior was draining me each day. This book is full of fast working ideas and strategies to work with your child, not against them. My son is a different child now and give most of the credit to this book. We have a solid rock foundation to build his life on.
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