"Finally, here is a look at the overwhelmingly positive effects of sexual expression in our lives, including increased self-esteem, feelings of personal fulfillment, and sexual ecstasy."
Whole Life Times
SEXUAL PLEASURE is for everyone interested in experiencing a deeply satisfying sex life. To experience deep sexual pleasure, you must explore your ability to enjoy - openly and sensually - basic human touch and relaxed, anxiety-free caressing. This book shows how to fully appreciate the pleasure of touching and being touched. SEXUAL PLEASURE encourages you to focus on your own sexual desire, rather than looking for ways to please your partner. This permission to be more in touch with what you enjoy actually leads to greater passion, sensitivity, and pleasure for both you and your partner.
The book includes the latest information and exercises on achieving mutual arousal and orgasm, including advanced lovemaking techniques such as shifting focus, peaking and plateauing. The exercises in the book can be used by people of any sexual orientation, and by those who have physical limitations, or who are just learning about their sexuality.
This new edition focuses more than ever on pleasure, contains two new chapters (one on oral sex, one on intercourse) and 20 new exercises. The text has a flowing reader-friendly approach. See Publishing History for further details of this revision.
This is a book about how to fall in love -- together -- with the pleasures of the body.
It is about coming home to what pleases you and achieving the mastery over your body that will take your love-making to new heights. It is about letting go of agendas, or trying to "turn on" your partner. It is about unlearning all of the attitudes that keep you from fully enjoying yourself, and each other.
SEXUAL PLEASURE's philosophy is quite controversial in this regard. Yet it has been proven repeatedly by many sex therapists and researchers. The philosophy is this: by learning to focus on your own sensations and enjoyment, you will actually become more sensitive to your partner's feelings and needs. Discovering what you enjoy can build your confidence, make it easier to ask for what you want, and bring a new sense of freedom in bed.
Many other sexual advice books emphasize the need to pleasure your partner at the expense of pleasing yourself. Credentialed therapists and self-styled experts alike may peddle this approach. I think it's harmful. I have seen it lead to performance anxiety. I have seen it alienate lovers who are simply trying to get closer.
Let me tell you what else doesn't work. I do not believe in the "try this position" or "try this technique" cookbook approach to sex. Developing your lovemaking to the point where it is as pleasurable and mutually satisfying as possible takes more than a positive attitude, an erotic setting, or a specific technique. The real secret is in developing sensuality -- an appreciation for the many nuances of feeling and the exquisite range of sensation of which the body is capable. The only real essentials of sexual pleasure, which you can develop with experience and practice, are:
** fully enjoying touching, your partner or yourself
** fully enjoying being touched, by your partner or yourself
** fully enjoying yourself during lovemaking, without anxiety or guilt
With these three basics, touch and feeling merge as a medium of experience and expression, and lovemaking becomes a deeply physical and emotional exchange that revitalizes and sustains you at all levels of being.
Isn't this refreshingly simple?
Barbara Keesling, Ph.D., has more than twenty years experience as a sex therapist and surrogate partner. She has taught sexuality courses at several universities, and also maintains a private sexual therapy practice. She currently teaches at California State University, Fullerton. She is the author of many popular sexuality titles, which have sold more than a million copies worldwide. She also has appeared often on television and radio. Her experience with hundreds of clients makes her uniquely qualified in the fields of sexuality and sexual pleasure.
Books include: Sexual Healing; How To Make Love All Night (And Drive A Woman Wild); Talk Sexy to the One You Love; Super Sexual Orgasm; Making Love Better Than Ever; Getting Close; Discover Your Sensual Potential: A Woman's Guide to Guaranteed Satisfaction; RxSex: Making love is the Best Medicine; All Night Long; How to Make Love to a Man Over Fifty; The Good Girl's Guide to Bad Girl Sex.
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