Read an Excerpt
After two failed marriages, I found myself single again. I had married the same type of man the second time around. I really had to take time to soul search. I felt I was a good person and worthy of "love". I only wanted what "every girl" wants: To be loved by her prince charming, have children and live happily ever after. Obviously, it sounds like a Cinderella story, but as women, we still hold on to that fantasy. We all want to become Cinderellas.
What if marriage, children or even wealth is not God's plan for you?
Would you be willing to settle for less than God's Best in order to fulfill your own desires?
Is there such a place called destiny?
I believe there is. Jeremiah 29:11 it states: "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
God is our Creator and He is also the Creator of our destiny. As Christians, we owe it to ourselves to find out God's plans for us instead of seeking our own.
I can recall something the Lord gave me a long time ago. I understood it then, but I did not think it applied to me until now: "Whatever you assume would bring you ultimate happiness, success or perfection, you will spend a lifetime trying to attain it; What if your assumptions are based on illusions? Your whole life will have revolved around a lie and you will never attain ultimate satisfaction."
When I looked into this further, I could see how many are victims of this world's illusions: "The American dream", "Pie in the sky", "Riches & Fame", just to name a few. All around us, the print media, television, music and even our culture, help to define, create and feed those illusions.
So, what is a Christian woman to do with all these influences of the day? My answer to you is to walk with God, in truth and in knowledge. Eph. 5:1-21 sums it up so well: We live in an evil time. A time in which evil is called good and good is called evil. People are most likely to go with the flow instead of stopping it.
As Christians, God expects us to be different. He expects us to be like Him. Even in today's society we still have Christian people getting into relationships for all the wrong reasons and doing things they ought not do, all for the sake of Love, Wealth, etc. We have young girls, who do not value themselves or their God enough to wait for marriage before giving up their virginity and older women, who do not teach by example to be holy, chaste women of God. Keep in mind, we still have women who do. Nevertheless, society's norm is, do whatever it takes to get whatever you want.
When we revisit Jeremiah 29:11, God tells us that the plans He has for us, are His. So stop wanting and start praying. Seek God's will for your life and let Him show you His plan. You will find that He has truly taken thought to what is best for you and what will fulfill you in every way, but you must wait on Him. It is too bad we can't have smooth sailing in our course of life. There is always opposition. But those that wait on the Lord will have renewed strength and will soar like Eagles unto the higher plans of God. (Ish.40: 31) It is my prayer that you will not settle for less than God's best. "Come, O house of Jacob, let us walk in the light of the LORD."(Ish.2: 5)
I was very young and still in high school when I met my first husband. There were so many choices at that age and choosing which guy to date was difficult. I chose a guy who was older than I and not a player. He had a stable family and seemed to be in control of everything including me.
I did not know what I was doing. I just figured those things were important to me. After all, he seemed like a good guy who was sincere with his feelings. We eventually married and through the physical and mental abuse, jealousy, possessiveness and isolation, I was blessed with two beautiful children. I was on a dead-end course with no way out. Then I remembered something my mother had taught me as a child; she taught me to pray. I prayed to God to deliver my children and I from that very real hell. He heard my cry and answered my prayer. My children and I were on a plane headed for California within two weeks, leaving everything behind. "Thank you Jesus!"
It took me a long time to get over that ordeal and I just knew I would never get married again. Through the love of the Lord, God restored me and gave me a new life. I was on my way and determined to raise my children unto the Lord as a single mom dedicated to the work of the Lord. Years had passed and people would ask me, why I was not thinking about marriage? I told them I was waiting on the Lord. In actuality, I did want a second chance at love but I was too afraid to risk being hurt again. Then I met husband #2. He was an older man, a minister in my church and was very well respected. He had a good job, very stable and most of all he said he was the one for me. I felt he must be the one. After all, he was in the church and even a minister. I just knew he would do right. So I took a chance on love again, but this time I hoped it was for keeps.
Unfortunately, my dreams were shattered as he shared with me on the same night of our wedding, something that would haunt me throughout the marriage. He said," I am just like your first husband." What a blow to my heart! I was devastated. Even though he was cruel and abusive, I tried to love him and be a faithful Christian wife. I felt that because I was married as a Christian now I had to make it work at all cost. Unfortunately, it only prolonged the years we were married, but it did not stop his behavior. I prayed and prayed for God to change him but he was fully set in his ways. I would see how God would deal with him but he would not listen. Eventually, God delivered my children and I again. " I thank the Lord!"
I can remember asking God, why where things so wrong when I tried so hard to be so faithful to God in serving my husband? The Holy Spirit gave me this scripture: "Unless the Lord builds the house they that labor, labor in vain." (Ps. 127:1) Even though I thought I trusted the Lord to build my house, the evidence still remained, an un-built home.
With that understanding, I had to accept the fact, I had made another bad choice and this was not God's plan for me. The scripture holds true: "We perish due to lack of knowledge". If I would have known what I know now, I would not have experienced those things, but thanks be to God for not allowing any experiences to be wasted.
It is by "experience", I share this book with you so you can have the tools necessary not to settle for less than God's best. To get the full benefit out of this book please read the Scriptural references.