Straight Talk with Gay Guys: What Girlfriends Can't Tell You and Straight Men Won't

( 2 )

Overview

Gay Men Can Be a Girl's Best Friend!

"You deserve to be treated like a queen—or at least be complimented by one. Keep a gay man on hand for self-esteem emergencies."

—Randy, one of the 33 gay guys featured in Straight Talk with Gay Guys

You're about to get the inside scoop on men! And who better to tell you everything you need and want to ...

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Straight Talk with Gay Guys: What Girlfriends Can't Tell You and Straight Men Won't

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Overview

Gay Men Can Be a Girl's Best Friend!

"You deserve to be treated like a queen—or at least be complimented by one. Keep a gay man on hand for self-esteem emergencies."

—Randy, one of the 33 gay guys featured in Straight Talk with Gay Guys

You're about to get the inside scoop on men! And who better to tell you everything you need and want to know about the opposite sex than gay guys?

Straight Talk with Gay Guys, written by a relationship expert and author of the megahit All Men Are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise, gives you the real deal on how and why men think and act as they do. Featuring constructive advice from experts on masculine behavior—33 smart, hilarious, observant, and caring gay men who are corporate executives, journalists, musicians, hairstylists, and a variety of other professions—this empowering guide offers the most insightful relationship advice you've ever had.


  • Learn to set boundaries for inappropriate behavior and stop jerks in their tracks

  • Hone skills for avoiding sexual mishaps and being manipulated into bed

  • Learn how to translate "manspeak"

  • Discover what women do that drives men away

  • Quit searching for Mr. Right and start having more fun dating

  • Identify and avoid the "now you see him–now you don't" guy

  • Close the book on Prince Charming and the Cinderella fairy-tale ending

Straight Talk with Gay Guys is a fun and eye-opening discussion that will help you improve your self-esteem, heat up the bedroom, and take control of yourown behavior with men to get more of what you want.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780757305764
  • Publisher: Health Communications, Incorporated
  • Publication date: 2/1/2007
  • Pages: 256
  • Product dimensions: 5.60 (w) x 8.52 (h) x 0.74 (d)

Meet the Author

Daylle Deanna Schwartz is the author two bestselling dating/relationship books, All Men Are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise and How to Please a Woman In & Out of Bed. Schwartz is known for her straightforward, friendly style of communicating and mixes a good dose of practicality and spirituality into all of her lectures. When she was on The Howard Stern Show radio program, Stern repeatedly said,"This woman knows what she's talking about."

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Read an Excerpt

Excerpts from Straight Talk with Gay Guys

Many gay guys are straight chick magnets, with loads of female friends who cry on their shoulders and welcome the practical advice given. The wonderful characters on the long-running TV show Will & Grace are an example of how advice from a gay friend is like no other. While gay guys are more sensitive and more straightforward in their assessment of a situation, they're still guys and part of the man club, and they're going to let us in!

Let's face it: We often need that swift kick in the ass to stop our moaning and complaining—and defending HIS inexcusable behavior. And this kick is what I and the thirty-three men involved in this book hope you will get out of this. You won't find step-by-step 'get that man' techniques, nor is this a self-help book that analyzes your dating behavior in a psychological way. This is just real reactions to some of our actions when it comes to figuring out guys, what they want, and how we should or should not think about any perspective mate. The advice is what you'd hear over a three-martini dinner with your gay guy friend. The mission of this book is to help you change your response to men in a way that will empower, not frustrate you.

Don't have a gay friend? Well, you've come to the right place. Now you have thirty-three, and they won't hold back what they want you to know! Where did I find guys to interview for this book? They come from all over. Some have been in relationships with, or were even married to, women. Others are insightful in their observations because they have experience hearing women complain about scenarios that have driven them crazy time and time again. I made sure to enlist the help of guys with female friends who come to them regularly with guy problems. They were excited to advise women for this book and were more than happy to share perspectives on straight relationships.

Why a Man as Your #1 Goal Sabotages Happiness

'Women sometimes go out of their way to find this Mr. Right, to the point where it becomes a vocation for them.' —Alex

Do you search for Mr. Right? Is each outing with friends another opportunity to scope out a potential partner? When finding a man dominates your life, you devalue yourself and compromise your happiness. The stereotype goes like this: Men are brought up believing that much of their self-worth comes from accomplishments; women are taught that theirs comes from an ability to get a man and get more points if he has an impressive career and money. So women often put most of their energy into finding and keeping a man, while men put their energy into proving how much they can achieve. A man's self-esteem increases with each career milestone, salary raise, victory over something, woman he scores with, or extra pounds he lifts in the gym. A woman's self-esteem goes down with each man who does her wrong.

Making Men the Center of Your Universe

The relationship sections in bookstores teem with material on how to find and keep a man. Why do we spend so much money and time learning strategies to handle men and keep them content? Most men don't go to these lengths to keep us happy! The exception is reading sex tips so they can get more. All of this reinforces the inflated importance of men. Rick gets frustrated when he sees women put their needs aside to cater to a man's. He explains: 'As a designer, one of the most painful things I see is women designing their apartment like some great, big mantrap. I had a client who asked me specifically to choose furnishings for her home in which a man would feel comfortable because she was preparing her home for a man. I said, 'How about you in the meantime? What are you going to enjoy?' That didn't matter to her. It was all about somebody else.'

Men aren't prizes. Many books encourage us to try hard to hunt him down and play games to lure him in. What is the value of that prize? Staying in a role to keep the games going? Catering to him? Going along with his whims? Putting up with bad behavior? Unhappiness with some delicious crumbs thrown in? Make yourself a prize that he'll want to have! We won't tell you how to find and keep a man. Instead, we encourage you to take the emphasis off of HIM, and put it on YOU. Find yourself first—create your own happiness. Open your eyes and pay attention! The better-than-nothing guy will leave you wallowing in regrets later. Being impatient about finding a man leads to unsatisfying choices, as Patrick points out: 'Whether through social hardwiring, an unwillingness to deal with any potential fear, or uncertainty and loneliness caused by seeking out a decent and intelligent man, many well-meaning, heterosexual women continue to sell themselves short—settling into a loveless marriage and subservient homemaker mode with the first or second cretin to satisfy them sexually. Don't do it! Good things come to women who wait.'

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 26, 2013

    This book has been like a really good friend to me. I first was

    This book has been like a really good friend to me. I first was introduced to this book through my public library. After I read the book, I by no means want to return this insightful book back, but I had to if I wanted to keep my library account in good standing status. So I made a promise to myself that I would go on the hunt to purchase this book myself. From my perspective this fabulous book offers such sound advise that it crosses genders and sexual orientations and reach hits the human heart. From my opinion, Daylle Deanna Schwartz has really did an excellent job with her book! I highly recommend this book!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted September 16, 2012

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