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Stupid White Men: And Other Sorry Excuses for the State of the Nation!

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Product Details

Read an Excerpt

Stupid White Men


By Michael Moore

Thorndike Press

Copyright © 2002 Michael Moore
All right reserved.

ISBN: 0786244046

Chapter One

A Very
American Coup

The following message was intercepted by U.N. forces on 9/1/01, at 0600 hours, from somewhere within the North American continent:

I am a citizen of the United States of America. Our government has been overthrown. Our elected President has been exiled. Old white men wielding martinis and wearing dickies have occupied our nation's capital.

We are under siege. We are the United States Government-in-Exile.

Our numbers are not insignificant. There are over 154 million adults among us, and 80 million children. That's 234 million people who did not vote for, and are not represented by, the regime that has placed itself in power.

Al Gore is the elected President of the United States. He received 539,898 more votes than George W. Bush. But he does not sit tonight in the Oval Office. Instead our elected President roams the country without purpose or mission, surfacing only to lecture college students and replenish his stash of Little Debbie's Snack Cakes.

Al Gore won. Al Gore, President-in-Exile. Long live El Presidente Albertooooooo Gorrrrrrrrrrre!

So who, then, is the man that now occupies 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue? I'll tell you who:

He is George W. Bush, "President" of the United States. The Thief-in-Chief.

It used to be that politicians would wait until they were in office before they became crooks. This one came prepackaged. Now he is a trespasser on federal land, a squatter in the Oval Office. If I told you this was Guatemala, you'd believe it in a heartbeat, no matter what your political stripe. But because this coup was wrapped in an American flag, delivered in your choice of red, white, or blue, those responsible believe they're going to get away with it.

That's why, on behalf of 234 million Americans held hostage, I have requested that NATO do what it did in Bosnia and Kosovo, what America did in Haiti, what Lee Marvin did in The Dirty Dozen:

Send in the Marines! Launch the SCUD missiles! Bring us the head of Antonin Scalia!

I have sent a personal request to U.N. Secretary General Kofi Annan to hear our plea. We are no longer able to govern ourselves or to hold free and fair elections. We need U.N. observers, U.N. troops, U.N. resolutions!

Dammit, we need Jimmy Carter!

We are now finally no better than a backwater banana republic. We are asking ourselves why any of us should bother to get up in the morning to work our asses off to produce goods and services that only serve to make the junta and its cohorts in Corporate America (a separate, autonomous fiefdom within the United States that has been allowed to run on its own for some time) even richer. Why should we pay our taxes to finance their coup? Can we ever again send our sons off into battle to give their lives defending "our way of life" -- when all that really means is the lifestyle of the gray old men holed up in the headquarters they seized by the Potomac?

Oh JesusMaryAndJoseph, I can't take it! Somebody pass me the universal remote! I need to switch back to the fairy tale that I was a citizen in a democracy with an inalienable right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of Happy Meals. The story I was told as a child said that I mattered, that I was equal to every one of my fellow citizens -- and that not a single one of us was to be treated differently or unfairly, that no one was to wield power over others without their consent. The will of the people. America the Beautiful. Land that I love. Twilight's...last...gleaming. Oh, say, can you see -- are the Belgian peacekeepers on their way? Hurry!

The coup began long before the shenanigans on Election Day 2000. In the summer of 1999 Katherine Harris, an honorary Stupid White Man who was both George W. Bush's presidential campaign cochairwoman and the Florida secretary of state in charge of elections, paid $4 million to Database Technologies to go through Florida's voter rolls and remove anyone "suspected" of being a former felon. She did so with the blessing of the governor of Florida, George W.'s brother Jeb Bush -- whose own wife was caught by immigration officials trying to sneak $19,000 worth of jewelry into the country without declaring and paying tax on it...a felony in its own right. But hey, this is America. We don't prosecute felons if they're rich or married to a governing Bush.

The law states that ex-felons cannot vote in Florida. And sadly (though I'm confident that Florida's justice system was always unimpeachably fair), that means 31 percent of all black men in Florida are prohibited from voting because they have a felony on their record. Harris and Bush knew that removing the names of ex-felons from the voter rolls would keep thousands of black citizens out of the voting booth.

Black Floridians, overwhelmingly, are Democrats -- and sure enough, Al Gore received the votes of more than 90 percent of them on November 7, 2000.

That is, 90 percent of those who were allowed to vote.

In what appears to be a mass fraud committed by the state of Florida, Bush, Harris, and company not only removed thousands of black felons from the rolls, they also removed thousands of black citizens who had never committed a crime in their lives -- along with thousands of eligible voters who had committed only misdemeanors.

How did this happen? Harris's office told Database -- a firm with strong Republican ties -- to cast as wide a net as possible to get rid of these voters. Her minions instructed the company to include even people with "similar" names to those of the actual felons. They insisted Database check people with the same birth... Continues...

Continues...


Excerpted from Stupid White Men by Michael Moore Copyright © 2002 by Michael Moore.
Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 126 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 20, 2010

    Nathan R McIntyre 3

    Stupid White Men is a book full of very interesting facts that involves Moore's entertaining sense of humor. He discusses many stupid white men from those behind the 2000 election of the "thief in chief" George Bush, to those involved with the mad cow disease outbreak. Moore is very serious about all that he advocates for which makes it hard to tell when he's joking. Such as when he encourages you to write letters to your elected officials, and soon there after advises you to save gas by hitch hiking. Some of his ideas seem some what over the top, such as blacks should put inflatable white dolls in their cars so racist cops will think they're chauffeurs. All in all, Stupid White Men is a good read that makes you look at the world a little differently.

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  • Posted January 19, 2009

    Very interesting and informing.

    This book caught my just by the title, Stupid White Men. I have always believed that there were a lot of stupid people out there, but I never put it into consideration that most of these people were white males. I agreed with just about everything that Michael Moore said in this book and it gave me a better understanding of how corrupt the government can be. I especially liked the letter he sent George Bush asking him if he was illiterate. I would definitely recommend this book, whether your democrat or republican.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 3, 2008

    You must read Stupid White Men

    I enjoyed reading Michael Moore's book, and I admire him for his sarcastic and witty style of writing. He wasn't afraid of speaking out his mind regarding those politicians 'Bush and Cheney' and CEO's who are running the country as they are responsible for polluting the environment and cutting funding for health and education, he also discusses other topics that deal with race, human rights and foreign policy. It's a good book full of shocking facts and statistics.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 8, 2007

    Read for the Contrary

    If you can See, then this book is for you.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 23, 2007

    A crazy, engaging and at times funny book that doesn't pull any punches.

    Stupid White Men is an aoutstanding acheivement by Michael Moore. I have watched Bowling for Columbine and I thought it was interesting and very truthful. Having seen Bowling for Columbine I dove right into this book and any doubts about this book that I had were thrown out the window when I started reading the first few pages. This book is politically intense throughout and it definitely will stimulate anyone's mind. A major factor that makes this book so brilliant is the tone that Michael Moore uses. Michael Moore is not a serious tone type of author. He is quite the sarcastic writer making his writing even more enjoyable and funny. One of the most memorable parts of the book for me was when Moore lists off all of the actions and laws that George W. Bush passed in his first few months of office. I'm not a Bush enthusiast whatsoever but I couldn't believe it when I read that Bush cut funding for programs dealing with child abuse and neglect by $15.7 million dollars. This is not the only shocking moment in the book. The whole book is astounding and it will leave you thinking in one way or another. So before you go calling Michael Moore a radical or extremist go read this book, you just might be intrigued.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted October 27, 2004

    sick of conspiracy theories

    This book is not one of Mr Moore's best. OK, we get the point...he hates conservatives, but do we democrats really want to have this guy as our 'mascot'? I would rather he be more focused on things that ACTUALLY happen, instead of all of his conspiracy theories. And dare I ask, what about all of the sordid things were going on in the White House before dubya? One (though it may be the only) thing he has on Clinton is that he's never LIED under oath while holding the office of Commander-in-chief because he was cheating on his wife! For shame! Moore is an embarassment...I want to read a book with truth, Mr. Moore. I guess that means reading no more of yours.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted October 28, 2004

    Great Stuff Michael

    If Moore were running for President I'm sure he'd have a lot of followers. Although I must admit some details can be a tad exaggerated, I stand up for this man who stood up to the world's 'most powerful' government and showed the nation how unperfect and dirty it really is. Thanks to Moore, the U.S. government has been revealed as the third-world banana republic it really is. (Weren't the 2000 elections enough?) I think this book crosses the boundaries that Democrats and Republicans alike have put up and presents another way of viewing this pathetic excuse of a democracy (or should I say bureaucracy). This certainly is a book I can relate to. A+

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 5, 2004

    A witty critique of American politics and society

    Before you blindly believe all the criticisms of Moore, you should at least read one of his books. This is a pretty good one. Sure, he goes overboard at time, but his criticism of Bush and his agenda is right on. Lost in the shuffle of most bush bashing is the fact that Americans bear some responsibility for the shameful decisions made by Bush. Moore points out that we are the ones who were duped by Bush's empty lip service to 'compassionate conservatism'

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 5, 2004

    ral

    i felt this book was a great book for the type of person that enjoys the true facts about things. I personally enjoyed it because it taught me all diferent types of new things concerning our country and world.this book touched all different areas of controveries while giving complete details giving something to go from when getting in an argument with others about these topics. its great for debates and maybee even to better yourselves mentaly, physically, and personably.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 28, 2004

    AWESOME! YOU CAN LEARN ALOT!

    It's BIAS. But If you are still trying to figure out an opinion on any number of issues; THIS book can HELP! I RECOMMEND FOR ANYONE GRADUATING FROM HIGH SCHOOL OR TURNING 18 OR ARE OLD ENOUGH TO VOTE! THE BOOK CAN HELP YOU CHOSE YOUTR OPINION ON ISSUES, IF YOUR TRYING TO DECIDE TO GO THRID PARTY, REPUBLICAN, DEMOCRAT, ETC.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted August 2, 2004

    Let the truth be known...

    Michael Moore is very honest in this must have book. This piece of literature is one of the most eye-opening books I have read. Moore takes his work very serious and yet makes modern politics (by modern I mean the Bush Administration), by stating the facts, seem like a real life Saturday Night Live skit! Michael Moore shows the honest ways of which 'president' Bush has conqured the constitution during the so called 'election'. This book is a must read for every American who is PATRIOTIC enough to question the whats-if's and future of our nation.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted August 22, 2004

    The Usual Liberal-Sided Exaggeration

    A lot of facts and things Americans should know, but obviously strongly biased by his political agenda.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 18, 2004

    People forget, these books are long editorials...

    Someone complained that Moore had a selective take on history, the books by stossel, o'reilly and hannity are no different (oh yeah, don't forget rush). Yeah, that's reality folks, people just cannot agree and there are enough facts that go either way. I must say, I enjoyed the book though and I highly recommend this book. Moore comes across as patriotic as Hannity, ironic isn't it?

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 13, 2004

    Humorous Yet Bold

    ¿Stupid White Men¿¿ is spewing with facts about all of the disgusting things that we might or might not know that our government is doing or has done since Bush was elected. Although the things Moore talks about are all of things that are wrong with this nation, he presents the facts in a very humorous way. He is trying to create awareness of our rights so they will not be taken away and he does so in a very bold way. In the book, there are wallet sized amendment cutouts. This is an example of how Moore is pushing people to practice their rights in real life. He wants people to make a stand in what they believe in, and this book gives several examples of how they can make a difference or just be heard. This book is a very good example of domacracy and it gives a lot of information. This book is recommended to anyone who likes humorous yet bold facts about the state of the nation.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted February 18, 2004

    Good Book

    A+, Great book, well thought out and researched. Nothing more to say.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 4, 2004

    Earth to Moore, come in Moore...aw, never mind...

    This book was just like the rest of Mr. Moore's efforts; funny because he takes it so seriously. With his selective take on history and jaundiced eye toward anything remotely conservative, he simply shows the hysteria of the left and his own lack of touch with 'real' Americans. Get out of the penthouse there, big boy. 2 stars simply because it got me laughing so hard. What? It wasn't a comedy? Pity.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 7, 2004

    Paranoia reigns supreme!

    This is an interesting book, highlighting the paranoia of the extreme left. Mr. Moore apparently believes in the 'vast, right-wing conspiracy', against which he views himself as a bastion of truth. The hypocrisy, paranoia, and sometimes sheer idiocy of his statements make this a great book if it was meant to be humorous... but scary as a indicator of the modern liberal mind.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 18, 2003

    brilliant

    Easily one of the best political satires in recent years, Michael Moore presents an ironclad case against the Bush Administration. Perhaps even better than books by contemporaries like Al Franken, Moore examines every aspect of Bush, Clinton, and America and tears them to hilarious shreds. A definite read for anyone left or right wing, or who is at all interested in politicals. Viva la Mike!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 4, 2003

    Hypocrisy

    This books serves as an interesting window into the mind of a liberal. It's hard not to agree with some of Mr. Moore's views however his over the top style is discouraging. He proudly displays the faults of our government, but is short on solutions. Out-of-context statistics run awry in this book. Another example of someone enjoying the privilages of this country while slandering it's integrity.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 1, 2003

    Moore the bore

    Same rehash as the left usually spreads around. They remind me of a manure spreader.

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