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Surviving a Borderline Parent: How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds and Build Trust, Boundaries, and Self-Esteem

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Overview

Surviving a Borderline Parent is the first step-by-step guide for adult children of parents with borderline personality disorder.

Between 6 and 10 million people in the US suffer from borderline personality disorder. This book teaches adult children how to overcome the devastating effects of growing up with a parent who suffers from BPD.

Although relatively common, borderline personality disorder (BPD) is ...

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Surviving a Borderline Parent: How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds and Build Trust, Boundaries, and Self-Esteem

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Overview

Surviving a Borderline Parent is the first step-by-step guide for adult children of parents with borderline personality disorder.

Between 6 and 10 million people in the US suffer from borderline personality disorder. This book teaches adult children how to overcome the devastating effects of growing up with a parent who suffers from BPD.

Although relatively common, borderline personality disorder (BPD) is often overlooked or misdiagnosed by therapists and clinicians and denied by those who suffer from it.

Symptoms of this problem include unpredictability, violence and uncontrollable anger, deep depression and self-abuse. Parents with BPD are often unable to provide for the basic physical and emotional needs of their children. In an ironic and painful role reversal, BPD parents can actually raise children to be their caretakers. They may burden even very young children with adult responsibilities.

If you were raised by a BPD parent, your childhood was a volatile and painful time. This book, the first written specifically for children of borderline parents, offers step-by-step guidance to understanding and overcoming the lasting effects of being raised by a person suffering from this disorder. Discover specific coping strategies for dealing with issues common to children of borderline parents: low self-esteem, lack of trust, guilt, and hypersensitivity. Make the major decision whether to confront your parent about his or her condition.

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Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher
“If Stop Walking on Eggshells has become the bible for people with a borderline family member, I predict that Surviving a Borderline Parent will become the ‘must have’ book for people who have a parent with borderline traits. Authors Kimberlee Roth and Freda Friedman have done a stunning job of validating the isolating experience of these ‘adult children,’ and more importnantly, shown them how to overcome the constant feelings of guilt, abnormality, and self-doubt. This book belongs on the shelf of every clinician and adult child with a borderline parent.”
—Randi Kreger, author of Stop Walking on Eggshells

“Kimberlee Roth and Freda Friedman provide comprehensive guidelines for adult children with borderline parents that help create balance and boundaries in these tumultuous relationships. The authors point to the need to break the ‘silent treatment’ around Borderline Personality Disorder and encourage clinicians to educate patients and family members about this diagnosis. This book is well worth the investment for any adult child with a borderline parent.”
—Christine A. Lawson, Ph.D., author of Understanding the Borderline Mother

“Life with a ‘normal’ parent can be hard enough. All of us have stories about low points in growing up. But ultimately we can look back on childhood with a warm feeling about our parents and feel that we were loved and nurtured. Not so for children of a parent with Borderline Personality Disorder. These adult kids may need to do years of work to recover from the narcissism of their caregivers. Surviving a Borderline Parent provides life-affirming signposts to the road back to emotional health.”
—Ross Werland, health editor for the Chicago Tribune

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781572243286
  • Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
  • Publication date: 10/20/2003
  • Series: Unassigned Series
  • Pages: 208
  • Sales rank: 130,251
  • Product dimensions: 6.10 (w) x 9.00 (h) x 0.45 (d)

Meet the Author

Kimberlee Roth is a health writer and journalist. She has written about Borderline Personality Disorder and topics related to physical and emotional well being for numerous newspapers and magazines, including the Chicago Tribune.

Freda Friedman, Ph.D., LCSW, is in private practice and a member of the Phoenix Institute in Chicago, Illinois. For the past twenty years, her primary clinical focus has been with Borderline Personality Disorder, providing treatment, education, support and consultation to people suffering from the disorder, their families and health care professionals working with them. She is on the board of several professional health care organizations and has developed BPD programs in New York and Chicago.

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4.5
( 10 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 10 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted September 16, 2011

    Excellent.

    I grew up with a borderline mother. This book really helps you understand the illogical thinking that goes behind a borderline's brain. I've found it extremely helpful. And no, you're NOT the one who's crazy....don't ever let a borderline parent tell you that are you because you might just end up believing it. They're the ones with issue. Just exercise distance from your parent and refuse to tolerate anymore antagonistic behavior from them. Trust me, you'll be saner in no time.

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 20, 2006

    Very Practical and Supportive

    This book was very helpful to me as an adult child of a borderline parent. It gave me validation, the secure sense that I was not going crazy through all this time of the tough experiences in this relationship with my mother. Reading the book was like I had told someone what I went through and they were talking to me about it. The exercises are very practical if you have the time to follow them. The only suggestion I would have for the authors would be a set of recommendations for how to connect with other family members who are not 'target' of the BPD behavior. Another aspect that would be helpful is to how to help a sibling that is going through this challenge, overcome the difficulties a BPD parent can cause to them and how they see life. Despite these two things not being part of the book, it is still a great work, a quick read, and understanding of where the adult child of a borderline parent is coming from. Also helpful for spouses of the adult children, to better understand them.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 7, 2005

    Therapy aid

    As a therapist, I have found this book to be particularly beneficial to the clients that I work with who have had abusive caregivers growing up. One client told me it helped her 'more than the Bible.'

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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