Surviving Your Adolescents

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Living with a teenager is no picnic. There are times when you must bite your tongue as they push towards independence. Or, if you sense there is trouble, there are times when you must take charge. This program gives parents a step-by-step approach that will help end the hassles and offer concrete solutions....

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Living with a teenager is no picnic. There are times when you must bite your tongue as they push towards independence. Or, if you sense there is trouble, there are times when you must take charge. This program gives parents a step-by-step approach that will help end the hassles and offer concrete solutions.

In Surviving Your Adolescents, you will learn:

  • What is normal adolescent behavior
  • How to manage teenage risk-taking
  • Exactly what problems require your "letting go"
  • The Four Cardinal Sins (What not to do)
  • The relationship between parent/teen communication and safety
  • The five ways to improve your relationship
  • What role to take: Observer, Advisor, Negotiator, Director
  • How to respond to emotional blackmail
  • From fashion to passion: guidelines to specific problems

"...understands the tests of patience adolescents can inflict on their parents and offers lessons that address not only authority and discipline, but also compassion and empathy."

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Editorial Reviews

VOYA - Debby Adams
Phelan, author of All About Attention Deficit Disorder (Child Management, 1996), begins with a clear introduction to basic adolescent psychology, with an emphasis on keeping MBAs-Minor But Aggravating behaviors-in perspective. He stresses the importance of communication between parents and teenagers and avoiding what he refers to as the Four Cardinal Sins: Spontaneous Problem discussions, Nagging, Insight Transplants (when parents expect their profound insights to be transplanted into the brain of their teen), and Arguing. By adopting these suggestions, parents can establish or repair positive relationships with their teens that will help them overcome the trouble spots. The next half of the book outlines a series of parental roles to deal with unacceptable behaviors, from Observing and Advising those MBAs, to Negotiating and Directing serious problems such as drug abuse. Phelan suggests two routes of Directing: the Major/Minor system (a penalty system set up in advance so teens know the consequences of irresponsible actions) and counseling, if all else fails or teens are putting themselves in extreme danger. Phelan reveals teens' various methods of Testing and Manipulation (buttering up, playing the martyr) and gives helpful guidelines in the last chapters for specific areas such as driving or school difficulties. Written in a friendly, approachable style, this book is full of practical advice for the overwhelmed parent of pre-teens and teens. It should be in every guidance counselor's office and public library.
Children's Literature - Kimberly Hutmacher
This book provides a map to help parents through the winding and sometimes bumpy road of their child's adolescence. Phelan begins by explaining normal teenage behavior. He goes on to explain common mistakes that parents make, referencing his "four cardinal sins" and explaining how by avoiding these sins, parents can smooth the road ahead. Phelan discusses different roles that parents should play in their children's lives: observer, adviser, negotiator, and director. He explains when each role should be used and how each one works. Specific chapters are also devoted to managing risk taking and handling testing and manipulation. The last section of the book is the one readers will reference time and time again. It provides guidelines for specific problems and several hypothetical examples detailing how to handle different situations. From fashion choices and chores, to more serious issues like smoking and depression, Phelan provides a practical common sense approach to not only parenting adolescents, but doing so while also keeping parent/child relationships strong and intact. Reviewer: Kimberly Hutmacher
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781889140100
  • Publisher: Parentmagic, Inc.
  • Publication date: 1/1/1998
  • Format: VHS - NTSC
  • Edition number: 2
  • Pages: 1
  • Product dimensions: 4.13 (w) x 7.25 (h) x 1.00 (d)

Customer Reviews

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Sort by: Showing all of 2 Customer Reviews
  • Posted August 22, 2009

    The Best Parenting Book I've Ever Read

    By far the easiest to read, put into practice and most importantly of all IT WORKS!!!!!
    This book was recommended to us while we were having some behavior problems with our youngest daughter, and the 1-2-3 prgram has worked wonders with BOTH of our childrens behavior and also has saved us 9as parents) alot of yelling, arguing and battling.
    I highly recommend this book for anyone with kids under the age of 12.
    Should be a part of ANY parents library.

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    Posted July 16, 2010

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